Reverend Jeremiah Wright

Fred emails:

1. The nonsense about the government injecting blacks with aids is an example of standard left wing BS of dodging responsibility. Aids is spread by promiscuity and drugs. By blaming the government (or whites), Wright is telling the African American community to dodge responsibility for bad behavior. This is fundamentally evil for several reasons. It prevents the Black community from actually taking the only reasonable corrective action that would reduce this problem. It fosters ignorance. It fosters racial hatred. In short, Wright’s actions are evil.

2. Regarding Moyers, query: what is the purpose of interviewing someone? Is the purpose of an interview to give that person a larger pulpit from which to speak? Is the purpose of the interview to give the public some knowledge about a person?

When a person does something, you can ask,

a) Why does he say he did it?
b) Why does he think he did it?
c) Why do others think he did it?
d) Why did he do it?

Here are some possibilities:

a) Wright actually believes his own BS. (To put it charitably, he has a distorted view of reality. To put it less charitably, he’s delusional.)

b) Wright is trying to pump up his political base for political reasons. (What’s a lie here and there? We can make whitey feel guilty or defensive, and have the black community feel entitled to be more assertive.)

c) The national platform is feeding Wright’s ego.

d) Wright hates America.

It would be interesting if Moyers had actually explored these possibilities, his interview might have been interesting.

Now why did Moyers not explore any of these issues? Possibilities include:

a) Moyers is sympathetic to Wright, and is willing to excuse his delusions out of sympathy. (This might be due to Moyers’s southern white guilt when it comes to race relations.)

b) Moyers doesn’t think that Wright’s delusional outbursts are significant. (If this is Moyers’s thinking, he is wrong. If there are leaders out there who are delusional, and those leaders have a strong following, it is a matter of great public interest.)

c) Moyers is engaging in politics, trying to turn the public’s attention away from the fact that Wright is a delusional nut, and toward some other subject that Moyers finds more to his liking. (It’s sort of like when the Wizard of Oz says to Dorothy, "Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.")

d) Moyers thinks that Wright’s outbursts have already gotten plenty of media attention. (If this is his thinking, his decision is wrong. While the public has gotten an earful of Wright’s delusions, they haven’t heard Wright’s explanation.)

In any event, Moyers is like a game show host who neglects to ask the $64,000 question. That makes him a terrible interviewer.

Posted in Jeremiah Wright | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Reverend Jeremiah Wright

Sinkers Or Floaters?

From oralchelation.com:

Most people in the US, if you looked into their toilets, would have "sinkers rather than floaters!"  In other words, if your food and digestion are proper, the stool will float in the toilet water, will be light in color, will be soft, but well-formed (not watery) and will NOT have a foul smell.  How many people do you suppose have "proper stool?"  The FDA estimate is that 50% of the population, at least, have hemorrhoids — so that means even more have problems with their stools.

The most common reason for "poor stool" would be the lack of fiber in the diet and the excessive use of processed foods, particularly sugar and bread.

Bill Cork writes:

In the comments at Protocols, I did a little reminiscing with Luke Ford about his dad, Desmond (see Luke’s autobiography for his account of their relationship–and Luke’s journey in life from SDA preacher’s kid to porn journalist and J-blogger).

It was rather ironic, I told him, that a couple of posts mentioning him (one of which he linked to) were just inches from one in which I mentioned Des.

As I said to Luke,

I was a big Des Ford fan in college–Glacier View was the summer before my freshman year. What can I say? He helped turn me from a Seventh-day Adventist into a Roman Catholic. 🙂

I read everything he wrote (I even read Gill’s booklet, "The Soteriological Implications of the Human Nature of Christ" [Gillian Ford is Luke’s stepmother, whom Des married after Luke’s mom died of cancer–see Luke’s autobiography]). I got all the way through "Daniel 8:14 the Day of Atonement and the Investigative Judgment." I had all his tapes and argued with students and professors about imputed justification and the apotelesmatic principle.

I wrote a couple articles about him for my college paper (and once did a cartoon of Neal Wilson, President of the SDA General Conference (and Ford nemesis) standing on the deck of the Titanic saying, "God himself couldn’t sink this ship.")

I can’t believe how after all the SDA church did to him he insisted on staying at its fringe, preaching his own mix of vegetarianism, Sabbatarianism, and Evangelicalism.

I remember one talk he gave where he said you could tell whether your diet was right by looking in the toilet and asking, "Sinkers or Floaters?"

Yes, Luke, you have an interesting family. 🙂

Posted in Health | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Sinkers Or Floaters?

No Country For Old Cars

"There will be blood," I worried Wednesday morning and emailed Amy Alkon for a ride to David Rensin‘s party tonight at the LA Press Club.

Twice I’d emailed the club my RSVP and eight times my emails came back to me thus: "This is an automatically generated Delivery Status Notification Delivery to the following recipient failed permanently: [email protected]"

Anti-Semites refusing to take my emails!

Amy emailed back no.

She thought about setting me up with her friend Claudia for a ride but realized the two of us wouldn’t work.

WESTWOOD. 5:30 p.m. I begin the long trek to 4773 Hollywood Blvd.

In one ear, I’ve plugged in a headphone from my CD player so I can listen to Larry McMurtry’s novel Telegraph Days.

The 22 year old female protagonist has a fondness for fornication.

That’s funny. So do I.

Crawling along Wilshire Blvd listening to my book, I munch Orthodox Union certified trail mix from a 44 ounce jar and think about how much I’d like to deeply get to know a stranger this evening.

There will be blood!

5:45 p.m. My engine starts smoking on Santa Monica Blvd, a half mile west of La Cienega Blvd.

It must be in reaction to my thoughts!

I look at my gauge and see I’ve overheated.

After inching a hundred yards through billowing smoke, I pull off to the side at the first empty parking space and pop the hood.

The plastic (?) container labeled coolant is boiling and steaming.

Steam, not smoke! Thank the good L-rd!

I pop the radiator cap then pick up my book on narcissism (Why is it Always About You?) and read for five minutes while the engine cools.

Other people are as real as I am.

Whoa!

When I finally open the radiator, I see it is empty.

After just paying $3000 for a new engine, you’d think they’d have spared me a little water.

I can’t believe I’ve broken down again.

I knew this would happen.

There will be blood!

I am driving through the Valley of the Shadow of Death yet I will fear no evil. HaShem is with me!

That rock there, I will speak to it. Must not stroke it. Nor strike it.

Lo, there’s a fountain. There are two fountains!

Across the sidewalk, there are bloody fountains!

I fill my water bottle and pour it into the radiator. It makes no dent in the existential emptiness.

The waters from the Almighty barely cover the ripples at the bottom of my tank.

I go back to the fountain and drink deeply from the wellsprings of life.

I feel purified.

Staring at a dead car and seeing expensive repairs ahead, I no longer lust!

I no longer want to bang shiksas!

I no longer thirst for blowjobs!

Glory, hallelujah! I’ve been redeemed. I’ve been washed in the blood of the lamb. I’ve been justified by faith. All my good deeds are like filthy rags. But I believe and my faith is accounted to me as righteousness.

I’ve been transformed by suffering, saved by grace!

Amazing grace!

I’m like Jewry after the Holocaust!

He prepareth a table for me in the midst of mine enemies.

My water bottle runneth over (along with my radiator)!

Surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life and I will live in the house of HaShem forever!

I pour my bounty into the radiator and over the engine, trying to cool things down.

I feel like a priest in the ancient temple performing some water ritual from Leviticus.

Hurrah! I notice a centimeter of water remains at the bottom of my radiator.

I look under the car and see streams of water.

I must’ve punctured something.

All those thoughts about busting through into the promised land, they were sins!

I’m paying the penalty of my ardor in my engine. It bears the marks of my unrestrained lust throbbing against my firm morals. My face may look saintly but all the wicked things I want to do, they get acted out up front on my mechanics (not the Mexican ones). That’s why I have constant car trouble!

I must wash away my sins.

I go back to the fountain and refill my water bottle.

I pour it into the radiator and — praise the good L-rd — the thing’s filling up.

I’m saved.

I look under the engine. There are drips of water, but no streams.

Floaters, not sinkers!

Maybe my radiator is OK after all. I haven’t checked its water level since getting my van back from the shop a month ago.

After my fourth trip to the fountain, my engine’s got all the water it can handle. With a fresh bottle for the road, I pull back on to Santa Monica Blvd.

Maybe I can make a bracha on this water and then sell it for its salvific properties!

At a break in the traffic, I take a hard left and climb towards Sunset Blvd.

I notice my heat gauge heading up, way up.

My engine’s about to explode again.

Oh wretched man that I am, who will deliver me from this burden of sin?

I received a miracle of divine grace, a fountain in the midst of a desert, and instead of prudently heading home, I turned towards David Rensin’s party.

Deep in my unconscious, was I fantasizing about hot slutty secular chicks?

Is that why I’ve behaved so recklessly?

Oh, down, down, down damn spot!

Wicked wanton little alliterative wanker.

What would Rabbi Akiva do?

I figure he’d turn down La Cienega Blvd and head for home.

It’s time to admit defeat.

I can do no good deed through my own power.

Salvation must come from above.

My heat gauge is almost at the top and getting hotter every minute.

I roll downhill, keeping my foot off the accelerator.

I don’t need any more testosterone pills. I shouldn’t take so many Pure MSM capsules. They rev my engine too high. They provoke lustful thoughts. They overflow my radiator. They spill my coolant all over the dusty soil.

I coast past Melrose Blvd and notice my heat gauge sliding down.

It’s now normal.

I’m OK.

I’m just like everyone else.

I’m not being tortured by a capricious deity.

Did the coolant kick in?

I wanna go see my buddy David!

I pull a hard left and head for the press club.

It’s 6:15 p.m.

The traffic flows like wine. I arrive at 6:30.

Coming out of the bathroom, I sneak up on resolute atheist Amy Alkon and run my finger up her spine.

She freaks out until she recognizes the hairy Jew.

I tell her how HaShem saved me with a miraculous fountain and supple traffic.

Kate Coe joins us.

"Kiss my tzitzit you secular bitches!" I scream. "Bow down to the G-d of Israel, and to me His chosen representative!"

That’s the essence of my thought process anyway. I fear that what came out was a more desultory and assimilationist, "Would you like to kiss my tzitzit?"

They both said no.

"Kiss my ass!" says Amy.

"The Torah forbids me! But would Claudia like to kiss my tzitzit?"

Amy doubts it.

Oh ye of little faith, bet Claudia would be all over my tzitzit, pulling on my strings till I give her a bracha!

Bitches!

Kate asks me if I applied for her old position with FishbowlLA.

"I sent in an email for the job, but I’m not sending them a resume for $15 a post. I’m Luke Ford."

Kate says nobody reads my blog anymore since I’ve gone all Jewish.

I spot the rosemary on every table and decide I’ll use it as mistletoe tonight.

"I’m macking on a very high level right now," I explain.

The wine lady asks me how I liked the movie, "No Country For Old Men."

"I respect it," I say, "but I didn’t find it emotionally fulfilling. It was like dry humping."

At 8 p.m., Amy calls the crowd to order. David speaks on his book for 17 minutes. By the time, Miki Dora’s friend Gerry Kantor got the mic, people had resumed their conversations.

I get in a quick video interview with Gerry, who runs the  Leucadia Surf School.

Gerry: "It’s the book of record. We’re all going to be dead soon. We need to get this stuff out for history."

"David verified everything I said."

Here are my videos of the night.

10:30 p.m. I’m driving home alone. On Western Blvd just south of Melrose, I’m pulled over by the cops (who’ve been driving beside me and behind me for several blocks).

I sit at the wheel and look at the loud flashing lights.

There will be blood.

Two Hispanic cops approach me. I hand over my driver’s license, registration and proof of insurance to one while the other shines a light into my serial-killer van and looks around.

I’m told I committed multiple offenses such as driving erratically, speeding, and changing lanes without signalling.

After they run my information, I’m let off with a warning to fix my broken tail light.

There won’t be blood after all.

Posted in Personal | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on No Country For Old Cars

A Mighty Heart

I just watched this film.

It has the tagline: "It was an event that shocked the world. This is the story you haven’t heard."

That’s nonsense. Only someone who knows nothing about Islamic terrorism could be shocked by this.

As for telling an untold story, that’s also nonsense.

I found it a boring movie. Most of it is about Mrs. Marianne Pearl waiting around to find out what’s happened to her husband Daniel.

As we all know what happened to her husband — he had his head cut off by Muslims terrorists — this does not make for a compelling cinematic experience.

I would’ve been more interested in a movie that focused on Daniel Pearl’s final days.

I have these random thoughts:

* It felt like this movie was made so Angelina Jolie could show that she could act. I don’t find it interesting to watch people "act." I want to get swept away by a good story. The only time I got swept away by this film was in its final minutes.

* Journalists aspire to objectivity and to being above the fray. They still get murdered by evil people.

* Journalists such as Daniel Pearl deliberately put their lives at risk to get a story (and fame and fortune and significance). This was the life that Daniel and Marianne chose.

* Daniel was not a religious Jew. He married a non-Jew. Yet he was intrinsically Jewish enough to get himself killed. In his final seconds, he said, "I am a Jew, my mother is a Jew, my father is a Jew…"

* When journalists become the story, they are no more friendly to journalistic coverage than regular folks.

* When Marianne is asked by a journalist if she saw the videotape of Daniel’s final seconds, she replied, "Have you no decency?" That ended the interview. The journalist was right to ask the question. It was the question most on my mind during the movie’s conclusion.

Fred emails:

1. Re "A Mighty Heart", a good screen play makes a movie. A great actor, without a good screen play, can never make a good movie.

2. Rev. Wright has always been a bombastic jerk. Before now, having a bombastic jerk as Obama’s pastor has never been a liability. Now, for the first time, Wright is a liability, and Obama is desparately trying to get rid of Wright as if he were stepped in a pile of dog droppings and is trying to scrape off his shoe. Except Wright refuses to go silently.

3. Prager is right about Moyers.

Posted in Hollywood, Jews | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on A Mighty Heart

Jeremiah Wright Speaks For The Left

Dennis Prager writes:

When Air America, the left-wing talk radio network, began, I predicted that it would not succeed. One of the main reasons I gave was that liberals already had their views expressed in the mainstream news media — the major networks, PBS and NPR (National Public Radio), and just about every major city newspaper. Therefore, the need liberals have for liberal talk radio is nowhere near the need conservatives have for conservative talk radio.

To its credit, the New York Times — through its public editor — has acknowledged that the Times is liberal; and anyone intellectually honest understands this is true regarding virtually all of the news media. But for those still needing proof, Bill Moyers supplied it on PBS this past weekend during his interview of one of the most radically polarizing figures in America today, the Rev. Jeremiah Wright, Sen. Barack Obama’s mentor and pastor for 20 years.

The Rev. Wright’s decision to allow himself to be interviewed by Bill Moyers was, from his perspective, an excellent one. It is difficult to imagine a less challenging, more fawning, interview.

How bad was it?

Given that one of the most egregious of the Rev. Wright’s statements was his charge that the American government developed the AIDS virus and inflicted it on black Americans, one assumed that the first major reporter to interview Wright since the comments were made public would ask him about it. Not Bill Moyers. Beyond mentioning in the opening introduction, "Wright repeating the canard heard often in black communities that the U.S. government spread HIV in those communities," the subject was never raised.

But Moyers did ask Wright tough questions like these:

"When did you hear the call to ministry? How did it come?"

"What does the church service on Sunday morning mean in general to the black community?"

Instead of challenging Wright’s un-Christian, anti-American and immoral "God damn America, God damn America" statement, Moyers asked three questions about it:

Here they are (I could not make up such puffball questions):

1. "One of the most controversial sermons that you preach is the sermon you preach that ended up being that sound bite about God damn America."

Wright’s response was to deliver a 300-word indictment of America for its violence against the world.

And how then does Moyers respond? With another killer question:

2. "What did you mean when you said that?"

So Wright then delivered another, 174-word, indictment of America for its evils.

But instead of challenging Wright or defending America, Moyers’ third question was:

3. "Well, you can be almost crucified for saying what you’ve said here in this country."

Moyers changes Wright’s "God damn America" to "Poor Rev. Wright."

And why not? It is soon clear that Moyers essentially agrees with Wright about America:

"What is your notion of why so many Americans seem not to want to hear the full Monty — they don’t want to seem to acknowledge that a nation capable of greatness is also capable of cruelty?"

For the many Americans who suspect that most Americans on the left silently agree with nearly all of Wright’s views of America, Moyers provided proof.

Nevertheless, Moyers’ total failure to confront the America-hating, race-preoccupied mentor of a man who may be the next president of the United States does not mean the interview was worthless. Any time Wright speaks publicly, even with the most sympathetic of questioners, we learn more about the two motivators of his thinking: race and contempt for America.

Here is Wright in his sermon the Sunday after 9-11 as replayed during the Moyers interview:

"Terrorism! We bombed Grenada and killed innocent civilians, babies, non-military personnel. We bombed the black civilian community of Panama with stealth bombers and killed unarmed teenagers and toddlers, pregnant mothers and hardworking fathers. We bombed Gadafi’s home and killed his child. ‘Blessed are they who bash your children’s head against a rock!’ We bombed Iraq. We killed unarmed civilians trying to make a living. We bombed a plant in Sudan to pay back for the attack on our embassy. Killed hundreds of hardworking people; mothers and fathers who left home to go that day, not knowing that they would never get back home. We bombed Hiroshima! We bombed Nagasaki, and we nuked far more than the thousands in New York and the Pentagon, and we never batted an eye! Kids playing in the playground, mothers picking up children after school, civilians — not soldiers — people just trying to make it day by day. We have supported state terrorism against the Palestinians and black South Africans, and now we are indignant? Because the stuff we have done overseas has now been brought back into our own front yards! America’s chickens are coming home to roost! Violence begets violence. Hatred begets hatred and terrorism begets terrorism."

To which Moyers offered another lacerating response:

"You preached that sermon on the Sunday after 9-11, almost seven years ago. When people saw the sound bites from it this year, they were upset because you seemed to be blaming America. Did you somehow fail to communicate?"

Finally, as regards the Rev. Wright’s Africa-centric form of Christianity, this was Wright’s explanation to his young church members as shown during the PBS interview:

"We wanted our stained-glass windows to tell the story of the centrality of Africans in the role of Christianity from its inception up until the present day. We play some interesting games educationally with the kids to help kids understand — ‘Can you name the seven continents?’ As a kid, you learn that in school. All right, on what continent did everything in the Bible from Genesis to Malachi take place?"

And, of course, the Reverend and his church’s answer is: Africa.

Now, as it happens, the Middle East is not Africa. It is Asia Minor, or Southwest Asia, if one must have an identifying continent. And Jesus was not black, nor were the apostles. It’s all racial pride. And not true. Africa in the Bible is overwhelmingly Egypt, which was not black and not a moral model.

In sum: PBS has done some wonderful programming. But when it comes to the news or anything controversial, it is as politically correct and liberal as the rest of the news media. As for Bill Moyers, had Mrs. Wright interviewed the Rev. Wright, the questions and reactions could not have been less challenging or even supportive. And as regards the Rev. Wright, the more he talks, the more one worries about Barack Obama’s values.

Posted in Dennis Prager | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Jeremiah Wright Speaks For The Left

Guilt By Association

Evan Gahr writes:

The New York Times has turned Barack Obama’s denunciation of Jeremiah Wright into a racial injustice.

The paper of record’s editorial today on Obama finally heeding calls to break with his race-baiting minister bitches that "African-Americans are regularly called upon to explain or repudiate what other black Americans have to say, while white public figures are rarely, if ever, handed that burden."

It takes a willful disregard of recent history to make that claim. When the white supremacist David Duke ran for Louisiana State Representative in Louisiana almost two decades ago the national GOP and then-President George H. W. Bush unequivocally denounced him, as liberals demanded.

To cite another of many examples: when right-wing commentator Pat Buchanan made blatantly anti-Semitic remarks in 1990 there were calls for conservative patriarch William F. Buckley, Jr. to condemn him. Buckley rose to the occasion with a 20,000 word essay–later turned into a book–that branded Buchanan an anti-Semite.

Ronald Reagan also unequivocally broke with the far-right John Birch society when he ran for California governor in 1966. Guilt by association is the standard by which blacks and whites are usually judged. And for good good reason. The willingness to break ranks with compatriots is a crucial moral test for anyone engaged in public ranks. It takes tremendous courage to denounce allies or associates for unconscionable behavior. You can end up with diminished influence and your former comrades new found enemies. It’s a price honorable men and women, of all ideological stripes, have willingly paid over the years.

Cold War liberals such as Joe Rauh and Arthur Schlesinger, Jr. founded Americans for Democratic Action in 1947 to separate liberals from communists. The ADA’s charter explicitly barred membership for communists.

More recently, in the 1980s, David Dinkins, the first black mayor of New York City, with little public pressure denounced Louis Farrakhan, even though Dinkins had almost nothing in common with the minister other than skin color. Renouncing allies is a rejection of the ends justify the means ethos. The demand for solidarity in the ranks, by contrast, is the stuff of totalitarians.

Posted in Blacks | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Guilt By Association

Smart People

So I was planning to stay home tonight to work on myself (if a guy ever tells you that, it means he’s boffing someone else).

But I got a last minute invite and went to see Smart People (at the Laemmle Regency where tickets before 6pm are only $3:50 and $6 normally).

I went into hysterics. I was louder than a hundred black men.

I couldn’t breathe.

My date was hushing me. People in the theater were turning around to look at me.

I was yelling at the screen "Oy ve!" Occasionally, I let loose with the f-word and "Watch out!"

I don’t know what came over me.

I didn’t sleep last night.

So I felt kinda drunk tonight.

I couldn’t stop cracking up.

I don’t know why but the sight of naked man ass just makes me scream with laughter.

The last time I went this nuts over a movie was 1999’s Walk on the Moon.

Evan Gahr emails: “I found the characters depressing and the supposedly witty dialogue quite pedestrian. The characters
were so self-absorbed they lacked any sense of irony, which made the movie all the more
unfunny.”

Posted in Personal | Tagged , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Smart People

Rev. Des Joins My Chat Room

From my live chat:

ChaimAmalek:  I mean, if you meet a man and he has perfume on him, don’t you think "it seems that other women are into him and have slimed him with their scent, so maybe I should get me some of that"
YourMoralLeader:  yeah?
Emma:  I would think… (what a faggot)
ChaimAmalek:  I am hurt
Emma:  lol
Emma:  Sorry
Emma:  Keep doing it Chaim
Emma:  You may get lucky
ChaimAmalek:  How about having a box of sanitary napkins on the floor of my car?
Emma:  Wow
ChaimAmalek:  Emma, luck is where preparation meets opportunity
Emma:  You really are desperate
ChaimAmalek:  OK, I’m just kidding here….trolling for laughs
Emma:  Sure you are hun 😉
ChaimAmalek:  For starters, I do not own a car
ChaimAmalek:  But LUKE ows a van……
Emma:  Stick them to your trousers then
ChaimAmalek:  Emma, how do you feel about men who wear shorts
Emma:  I see nothing wrong with it
Emma:  Nothing much wrong with it
ChaimAmalek:  What about men in really short shorts
Emma:  Hmmm
Emma:  If they are wearing tight short shorts
Emma:  Not good…
ChaimAmalek:  Strike two against me
Emma:  No actually its wrong….
Emma:  Short shorts
User RevDesmondFord entered the room.
Emma:  Here we go……
ChaimAmalek:  Luke, you need to hold more press conferences
Emma:  Bless you.
RevDesmondFord:  i’m glad to see that somebody called my out my sinker of a son.
ChaimAmalek:  Rev, you seem to be a sturdy son of the Southern Cross.  How is it that your son turned out as he did?
ChaimAmalek:  After all, the apple does not fall far from the tree
RevDesmondFord:  i believe it started when he gave his mum cancer.
ChaimAmalek:  Not nice
ChaimAmalek:  I blame it all on his odd diet.
RevDesmondFord:  look at the little ponce now -playing dress up with his kipah. phony.
ChaimAmalek:  I mean, what Jew wont eat beef?
RevDesmondFord:  that is irrelevant as my ponce of a son is not, and never has been jewish.
RevDesmondFord:  his brother paul is much more successful.
ChaimAmalek:  One day soon he will be a celebrity and you will think differently of him
ChaimAmalek:  He’ll have a hot teenage wife, too
RevDesmondFord:  one day soon i’ll gut him from stem to stern.
YourMoralLeader:  Hi Dad
YourMoralLeader:  It’s been too long
RevDesmondFord:  Listen up, dunny Jim.
YourMoralLeader:  Floaters today, dad
RevDesmondFord:  BLOODY LIAR!
RevDesmondFord:  how does it feel to be a slimy, creepy little anti-Semite obsessively pretending to be Jewish, son?
RevDesmondFord:  i fair-dinkum enjoyed that chap’s indictment of you today.
RevDesmondFord:  he was dead on.
RevDesmondFord:  your misguided friend Emma should smarten up.
YourMoralLeader:  she’s my only joy, dad
Emma:  I couldnt get any smarter if I tried
RevDesmondFord:  your weak response to the truth: "Because it’s FUN!" i assume this is your "hee-hee" personality manifesting itself again, boy.
YourMoralLeader:  yes dad
YourMoralLeader:  Dont worry, I’ll crash soon and get all self-loathing
RevDesmondFord:  i should have beaten that out of you with a cricket bat when you were a child.
RevDesmondFord:  My boy has proved himself a great poofy poonagger!
YourMoralLeader:  is that bad?
RevDesmondFord:  look at that smug face, the phony "jewish" costume. you loathsome little anti-semitic twat, i ought to make you eat a burst toad.
Emma:  lol burst toad
YourMoralLeader:  You raised me a vegetarian, dad.
ChaimAmalek:  I say a man who attracts so much female interest cannot be a loser
melissa:  were u from urself
RevDesmondFord:  Listen, Emma, I’d crack a fat and rub you raw…with or without the frosty whole milk. My boy wouldn’t know what to do with it. Anyone seen the shots of him being whipped by a particularly loathsome trollop while he writhed in his tighty-whiteys? Ponce.
RevDesmondFord:  you still haven’t answered my question.
RevDesmondFord:  and Union is still right about you.
YourMoralLeader:  what’s the question?
RevDesmondFord:  how does it feel to be a slimy little anti-Semitic freak obsessively pretending to be Jewish?
YourMoralLeader:  good
cuntpunt:  RevDesmondFord, ever hear of hell?
cuntpunt:  you should go sometime…
RevDesmondFord:  please elaborate, boy. Let’s hear your excuse for this behavior.
cuntpunt:  are ytou his dad?
RevDesmondFord:  yes, i am Luke’s Dad. Not that I’m proud of it.
RevDesmondFord:   I’d like to stomp my silly poofter of son like a car tyre bursting a cane toad.
cuntpunt:  Do you realize that Luke is a celebrity to us and we dont like whem people come in and bash him
RevDesmondFord:  a "celebrity" for what reason, nancy? for his distinguished history of plagiarism, his shoddy pseudo-journalism, or his deranged anti-Semitic obsessions?
cuntpunt:  who is nancy?
YourMoralLeader:  I’m gonna watch the movie "Amazing Grace"
YourMoralLeader:  I feel like it is my story and our story, dad
RevDesmondFord:  my son hides like the coward he is.
YourMoralLeader:  I wish we could watch it together.
RevDesmondFord:  there’s my son’s hideous, leering face. i wish he’d just kept hiding.
cuntpunt:  he is beautiful
RevDesmondFord:   Holly Randall’s got a bum as big all outdoors, mate.
cuntpunt:  a man of such faith as yourself Rev should find the beauty of anyone, esp your son
RevDesmondFord:  listen to his effeminate cackling.
cuntpunt:  I Love You Luke
YourMoralLeader:  I love you too!
RevDesmondFord:  let’s discuss your pseudo-intellectual right-wing opinions, son.
YourMoralLeader:  I can’t help being effeminate
YourMoralLeader:  Yes dad?
QuixoticLass:  hey pops
YourMoralLeader:  I’m gonna run for US Senate in 2010 for CA? Will you be my spokesman?
QuixoticLass:  hahahahaha
RevDesmondFord:  My son listens to Air Supply. I listen to AC/DC. So does his brother Paul and his half-caste children.
RevDesmondFord:  i was well pleased to see the remarks from that gentleman on your website today.
RevDesmondFord:   Anybody seen Aussie celebrity chef Kylie Kwong? That slit-eyed sheila can slather my toast with vegemite any time.
User Cami left the room.
YourMoralLeader:  Dad, I’ve missed you so much. I wwant to be just like you.
RevDesmondFord:  my son thinks his self-published anti-semitic tracts make him a "celebrity."
RevDesmondFord:  what a c u n t you are, son.
cuntpunt:  aaaahhhhh
cuntpunt:  not very nice
RevDesmondFord:  "pseudo-intellectual ultra-right Nazi newspaper that presents itself as a legitimate intellectual exercise, but is really an attempt to connect half-truths in such a way as to provide one opportunity after another to introduce your own narrow world view.
RevDesmondFord:  SPOT ON, MATE!
RevDesmondFord:  This is not journalism. This slimy, slanderous, ugly, and unskillful. And I think your attempts to project something other is – to the trained eye – just another attempt to find an audience of untrained and moderate intelligence readers who will buy into
RevDesmondFord:  SPOT ON AGAIN!
RevDesmondFord:  well, my c u n t of a son, i’m glad there are a few people out there who see your obvious true nature.
RevDesmondFord:  i’m sure your flock of chat room retards will continue to bolster your needy little ego in the manner to which you feel entitled. c u n t.
RevDesmondFord:  One of these days, boy, I’ll show up on your doorstep, cuff you a great clout upon the ear, and proceed to stomp you flat…and then you’ll replace all the food you’ve stolen from the homeless–double–and then you’ll eat one of your own sinkers just for good measure.
RevDesmondFord:  This is not journalism. This is slimy, slanderous, ugly, and unskillful.
RevDesmondFord:  And I think your attempts to project something other is – to the trained eye – just another attempt to find an audience of untrained and moderate intelligence readers who will buy into your assertions and distortions as the "real deal."
RevDesmondFord:  SPOT ON!
guest78:  this room is one fooking mess
guest78:  your a pig luke
RevDesmondFord:  my swinish son is an impotent crackpot.
RevDesmondFord:  but i’m glad somebody called him out on his rot.
RevDesmondFord:  And I think your attempts to project something other is – to the trained eye – just another attempt to find an audience of untrained and moderate intelligence readers who will buy into your assertions and distortions as the "real deal."
guest78:  cleanup
RevDesmondFord:  This is not journalism. This is slimy, slanderous, ugly, and unskillful.
cuntpunt:  RevDesmondFord is blowing of steam in here towards Luke, because he not getting his c o c k sucked at home
RevDesmondFord:  i’m here to tell the truth – something which my son claims to seek.
RevDesmondFord:  UNION WAS RIGHT
cuntpunt:  he doesnt seem too receptive to you now does he?
RevDesmondFord:  tell us about Rabbi Union, son
RevDesmondFord:  that’s how my son copes with the truth: very selectively.
cuntpunt:  I dont understand why you would confront him in such a public place
RevDesmondFord:  what a pig.
guest78:  he dosent like the truth
RevDesmondFord:  he sure doesn’t, sunny Jim!
guest78:  what a messy pig
RevDesmondFord:   Jim Dumps was a most unfriendly man, Who lived his life on the hermit plan; In his gloomy way he’d gone through life, And made the most of woe and strife; Till Force one day was served to him / Since then they’ve called him "Sunny Jim." 
guest78:  i bet he smells
RevDesmondFord:  hey, c**t!
cuntpunt:  yes, satan?
guest78:  lol
RevDesmondFord:  i’m addressing my son.
cuntpunt:  but that is my name
RevDesmondFord:  pseudo-intellectual ultra-right Nazi newspaper that presents itself as a legitimate intellectual exercise, but is really an attempt to connect half-truths in such a way as to provide one opportunity after another to introduce your own narrow world view."
RevDesmondFord:  FAIR-DINKUM RIGHT!
cuntpunt:  why do you keep repeating yourself Rev, you hit the bong too much today?
RevDesmondFord:  I’ll continue to repeat those words until my son acknowledges the truth.
RevDesmondFord:  notice how he turns away
guest78:  cant look us in the eye
RevDesmondFord:  what a sickening slob.
guest78:  ewww
RevDesmondFord:  Perhaps, had you actually graduated from college, and developed the skills appropriate to journalistic integrity, you might have been better able to balance the "darker" stuff you love to dwell upon, and balance that out with real insightful conclusions
RevDesmondFord:  rather than the spurious ones you make with gleeful abandon.
RevDesmondFord:  your entire act springs from your resentment – at not being accepted by real journalists, at being reviled by even the porn industry, at your failure with women, your Mum’s death from the cancer you gave her in the womb…
guest78:  no wonder he never go married
RevDesmondFord:   I should have throttled you at birth. To my shame, I let your dead mother talk me out of it.  I regret it to this very day. But I’ve got an abo bull-roarer that I’ll use to great effect when i see you, boy.

Posted in Personal | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Rev. Des Joins My Chat Room

New York Is Quiet – We Have Our Shvartzes Under Control!

From my live chat:

Emma:  How is your day going Chaimy?
YourMoralLeader:  Hymie
ChaimAmalek:  Like any of my post-sexual days
YourMoralLeader:  did she make a slur?
Emma:  lol
YourMoralLeader:  How are things in Hymie town?
Emma:  Hymie?
ChaimAmalek:  (Luke, I fear she’s another Jew hating antisemite….like all hot shiksas…doing this only to spite the Jewish woman!)
Emma:  lol… I dont hate jews
YourMoralLeader:  prove it to this jew!
Emma:  Jes are freinds
ChaimAmalek:  Things are quiet in NY.  We have our shvartzes under control
ChaimAmalek:  Of course, it might be the quiet before the storm, much like India before the great Sepoy Rebellion
ChaimAmalek:  You can never tell what those people are thinking.  Just look at Rev. Wright
ChaimAmalek:  Luke, is it too soon for you to begin thinking about Miley Cyrus?
ChaimAmalek:  About how you would bring her closer to God?
YourMoralLeader:  who dat?
ChaimAmalek:  See Emma, he exists on a higher plane.
Emma:  Ahuh
ChaimAmalek:  I am trying to package Luke for reality TV, but that’s the problem
Emma:  Package him?
ChaimAmalek:  Sell him as a concept to the Jews who run television
Emma:  Ah
YourMoralLeader:  What’s the problem?
Emma:  lol
ChaimAmalek:  They say he is not authentic enough
ChaimAmalek:  Or they want to tart it up with slutty females
ChaimAmalek:  I want it kept on a higher plane
YourMoralLeader:  Emma’s as tarty as I wll go
ChaimAmalek:  Gawker has an interesting article about a Dartmouth lecturer who is suing . . . her students for being racist and violating Title 7
ChaimAmalek:  Emma, I admit that even though I am postsexual, I still try to fool the ladies into thinkingI got game.  So when I go out, I sometimes wear women’s perfume so that women willthink I am dating women.  I ask you as a disinterested third party, how effectiv
ChaimAmalek:  is that strategy?
Emma:  lmao
Emma:  Its pathetic
ChaimAmalek:  You sure?
Emma:  Yes
YourMoralLeader:  That is pathetic
YourMoralLeader:  sheesh
YourMoralLeader:  do you smear lipstick on your cheek too?
Emma:  lol
Emma:  LMAO
ChaimAmalek:  I mean, if you meet a man and he has perfume on him, don’t you think "it seems that other women are into him and have slimed him with their scent, so maybe I should get me some of that"
YourMoralLeader:  yeah?
Emma:  I would think… (what a faggot)
ChaimAmalek:  I am hurt
Emma:  lol
Emma:  Sorry
Emma:  Keep doing it Chaim
Emma:  You may get lucky
ChaimAmalek:  How about having a box of sanitary napkins on the floor of my car?
Emma:  Wow
ChaimAmalek:  Emma, luck is where preparation meets opportunity
Emma:  You really are desperate

Posted in Personal | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on New York Is Quiet – We Have Our Shvartzes Under Control!

Should Lukeford.net Be Short & Concise Like My Davening? Even During Coitus, I’m Dictating New Commentaries

From my live chat:

YourMoralLeader:  hi Emma!
YourMoralLeader:  I’m a sensual semite!
Emma:  Hey Luke!
YourMoralLeader:  hi
YourMoralLeader:  what have i missed?
Emma:  Nothing… it’s dead in here without you.
YourMoralLeader:  aww
YourMoralLeader:  i thought it was dead without you
User ChaimAmalek  entered the room.
Emma:  Hiya Chaim
YourMoralLeader:  my leader
ChaimAmalek:  Hello Emma
ChaimAmalek:  Luke, your blog of late has too many big words and long sentences that become huge paragraphs
ChaimAmalek:  I want my lukeford.net short and concise, like my davening
ChaimAmalek:  Pared down
ChaimAmalek:  Emma, who would you like to see become the next US President: Obama, McCain, or Clinton?
Emma:  I don’t pay any attention Chaim
YourMoralLeader:  Pay attention to this baby!
ChaimAmalek:  Emma, your presence here intoxicates me so that I may forget to vote this November
e, like my davening
ChaimAmalek:  Pared down
ChaimAmalek:  Emma, who would you like to see become the next US President: Obama, McCain, or Clinton?
Emma:  I don’t pay any attention Chaim
YourMoralLeader:  Pay attention to this baby!
ChaimAmalek:  Emma, your presence here intoxicates me so that I may forget to vote this November
Emma:  Pay attention to what Luke?
ChaimAmalek:  I sense your potent pheromones ever from this vast remove
Emma:  You?
Emma:  Oh right he means him
ChaimAmalek:  If I were a married Mormon man living on a compound in Texas, I would want you to be my next wife.
ChaimAmalek:  Or my first wife
ChaimAmalek:  Emma, will you marry me?
ChaimAmalek:  PLEASE?
Emma:  No
ChaimAmalek:  My heart is crushed.
Emma:  Sorry Chaim
Emma:  I only have eyes for Luke
ChaimAmalek:  As will be two of Obama, Clinton, McCain come NOvember
ChaimAmalek:  But Luke is on an ethereal plane, far above matters of the flesh that animate other men and which delight women
YourMoralLeader:  true
Emma:  Your point is?
ChaimAmalek:  I see you together on your honeymoon, Luke having eyes only for the tiny print that is the commentary on the Talmud
Emma:  lmao
YourMoralLeader:  I love G-d so much!
Emma:  mmm
ChaimAmalek:  Even during coitus, he is apt to be dictating his new commentaries.
YourMoralLeader:  My work is v. important
guest65:  That’s a great line.
ChaimAmalek:  Not for nothing are the priests of Rome celibate
ChaimAmalek:  Luke was meant to be a priest, aloof from the passions of ordinary men
guest65:  YLM is the new Rashi; he’s so devout that even during coitus, he expands the torah.
Emma:  How is your day going Chaimy?
YourMoralLeader:  Hymie
ChaimAmalek:  Like any of my post-sexual days
YourMoralLeader:  did she make a slur?
Emma:  lol

Posted in Personal | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Should Lukeford.net Be Short & Concise Like My Davening? Even During Coitus, I’m Dictating New Commentaries