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"Luke Ford reports all of the 'juicy' quotes, and has been doing it for years." (Marc B. Shapiro)
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Monthly Archives: May 2009
Short Cuts
* About three years ago, I made the mistake of telling this nine-year-old girl that I smoke cigars (she had been propagandized at school that this was evil). I was kidding. I do not smoke anything. Ever since, however, she … Continue reading
Posted in Personal
Tagged bat mitzvah, breakfast burrito, delicious breakfast, fine spray, schwart, shiksa
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Increased Security At Synagogues This Sabbath
One prominent shul on Pico Blvd emails its members: Dear Members, In light of the Jewish Institutions security situation in New York, we will be extra cautious this Shabbat. We request your cooperation and compliance with directives. There is no … Continue reading
Posted in Synagogue
Tagged armed guard, front doors, jewish institutions, pico blvd, shabbat shalom, shul
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The Unkindest Cut?
David Deutsch writes: First of all, I don’t know if this is a reflection on you or on him, but I haven’t seen David Kelsey so excited since he got a mention from VDARE. Now, on to an important question … Continue reading
Posted in David Deutsch, David Kelsey
Tagged adult circumcision, David Deutsch, David Kelsey, five minutes, shabbos, vdare
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I Try To Lead The Jews Into The Promised Land Of Heterosexual Love
I’ve had such a trying day. I got bitten by a ferocious dog. I made several highly inappropriate remarks of a sexual nature over lunch and accidentally intimated that one or both of my hosts had lied to the other … Continue reading
Posted in Personal
Tagged biblical prophecy, clap my hands, massive headache, mortal fear, self denial, utter fool
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God’s Phallus
Do you ever go to a website or another holy site and seek words of Torah, only to have repeatedly thrust in your face the most aberrant forms of sexuality? Yeah, me too. I’m a tender soul and I’m just … Continue reading
Posted in Personal
Tagged angel heart, consonance, greek word, little dogs, mickey rourke, tender soul
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