Tag Archives: shabbos

I Got A Bracha (Blessing) On Shabbos

On Friday night, an Orthodox acquaintance walked over to me and asked, “Do you want a bracha?” “I’m sorry?” I said. “Do you want a bracha?” “Umm, yes,” I said and bowed my head. He said that he wished me … Continue reading

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Parashat Va’etchannan (Deuteronomy 3:23-7:11)

I discuss the weekly Torah portion with Rabbi Rabbs this Monday at 12:30 pm PST on my live cam and on YouTube. Facebook Fan Page. This week we study Parashat Va’etchannan (Deuteronomy 3:23-7:11). Kirk emails: Is someone allowed to make … Continue reading

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Converting To Orthodox Judaism Is Hard

How come a lot of people — maybe most people — don’t find converting to Orthodox Judaism more difficult than getting an AA degree from a community college? I think it depends a lot on a person’s temperament. You can … Continue reading

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Orthodox Jews Have Their Own Language

Heshy Fried — the most consistently amusing Jewish blogger — writes: Orthodox Jews have their own language, some call it yinglish, but we really add English, Yiddish, Hebrew, Aramaic and random terms from the Torah into out lingo. Where else … Continue reading

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I Might Be Lazydox

Heshy Fried writes: You tend to only wear tzitzis on shabbos or when you want to make people think you are frummer than you really are, like at shachris You want to daven maariv, but are so damned tired that … Continue reading

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Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

I was talking to a girl motzi Shabbos. She wanted to break up. She said we had no future together. Afterwards, I went to take a cold shower. I noticed my chest was covered in red welts. For the past … Continue reading

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She Purrs

She called Friday at 8:08 pm. He couldn’t pick up the phone because it was the Sabbath, but it was their pre-arranged signal for him to come out to get her. He wouldn’t get to listen to her message until … Continue reading

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Should One Say Gut Shabbos To A Member Of The Opposite Sex Who You Don’t Know?

In my experience, saying "Gut Shabbos" to a member of the opposite sex who you don’t know too often leads to the grossest forms of immorality. As I walk down Pico Blvd on a Shabbos, I only say hello to … Continue reading

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Musings

* Rabbi Kalman Topp is off to a great start at Beth Jacob. He seems warm, sincere. He gave an excellent sermon. He has big shoes to fill — previous rabbis of Beth Jacob include Steven Weil, Abner Weiss, Maurice … Continue reading

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Lending A Hand On Shabbos

Just a few minutes before Shuvuot, as I was walking to a friend’s home for dinner, I passed two Mexicans in an alley with a beat-up old truck. A middle-aged man and woman were straining and failing to put a … Continue reading

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