Monthly Archives: March 2008

Strippercize

Posted on March 2, 2008 by Luke Ford

As I make my rounds of Jewish singles events, I run into a lot of women who used to be hot. Many of them toyed with me and then dumped me. Now they’re not so hot and not so married. … Continue reading →

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Which Jewish Charities Would Be Best For Laundering Money?

Posted on March 2, 2008 by Luke Ford

As a blogger, I have a ton of dirty money lying around my hovel and getting in the way of my holy work. I need to find a way to clean it. Which would be best? Etta Israel? Agudah? A … Continue reading →

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Fixing Surgically The Eyes Of Down Syndrome Girls To Marry Them Off

Posted on March 1, 2008 by Luke Ford

Have you ever heard about this? I hear it’s done in Los Angeles. They can even marry them off with large dowries.

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What Do I Need To Do To Get Back Into Young Israel of Century City/Beth Jacob?

Posted on March 1, 2008 by Luke Ford

I’m sick and when I’m sick I tend to write more honestly than normal. Less bravado and more heart. Not a day goes by without my longing to return to the shuls I used to haunt. Particularly I want to … Continue reading →

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People Who Are Infectious Shouldn’t Go Out In Public

Posted on March 1, 2008 by Luke Ford

I came down with some nasty cold or flu yesterday and couldn’t go to shul today. I went to shul to daven Wednesday evening and ran into a friend. He wouldn’t shake my hand because he was sick. So he … Continue reading →

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