Thinking Vs Awareness

Jennifer Fine writes: Thinking is an action that is linear in nature. If I ask you to add two large numbers together, or ask you which route you take to work every morning, chances are you will pause, your facial muscles will contract ever so slightly, and your mind will take you out of the room as words and images move past your mind’s eye. Thinking often has A LOT to do with the past or the future. When my mind wanders away and I “think” about things, it usually has to do with things that have happened before this moment, or speculation about things that might be tomorrow.

Awareness is a vastly different state. Awareness can only occur in the present moment, and generally has very little to do with words that are not being said or images that are not being seen right here right now. Awareness invites us to see, hear, smell, taste, and feel. Thinking asks us to compare what is being felt now to a previous feeling or supplies us with an expectation of a feeling yet to come. Awareness knows only the feeling being felt this time.

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The Blogger With The Dragon Tattoo

I remind myself of the fictional journalist Mikael Blomkvist, but it is the girl with the dragon tattoo who really gets me going. I empathize with her rage and her fierce desire for independence.

A big part of the reason that I love blogging and teaching Alexander Technique is that nobody can tell me what to do and nobody can take away my license. I can do my own thing and for that privilege I will pay almost any price.

When I decided to train to be an Alexander teacher, I knew that I’d have to rein in many of my habitual impulses to offend. I knew the work would take place with the same people year after year in a small room.

So for three years, I largely held myself in check. It wasn’t that hard. I’ve done it many times before. I wasn’t totally successful in my goal, but the amount of offense I gave in the classroom was about one-tenth of the amount I gave outside of it.

On my first day of training, I learned the school had a policy of no public discussion of controversial issues such as sex, politics and religion because that could get in the way of the work.

For the first few months, I thought the director was a priss and I loathed the policy. Then I gradually came to see its wisdom and adopted it for my own teaching.

I never deliberately give offense to my Alexander students during their lessons. I don’t bring up sex, politics or religion unless I know the person’s boundaries. I don’t (usually) say things to distract from the work.

Outside of lessons, however, I feel about as much joy in offending as I ever did. Despite years of Alexander lessons, my bad boy posts on Facebook remain a principle source of my energy.

On my blog, I’ve calmed down, but I am still routinely giving offense.

I loathe people who abuse authority and I can’t wait to bring them down. That’s what drives me. I think. I remember figures in my early life who abused their religious authority and I hate anybody who reminds me of them.

My offensive writings curtail my success as an Alexander teacher, reduce the number of my potential students and complicate my relationships with my peers.

I wonder where I will go from here?

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What Is A ‘Soft Block’?

I was just checking out my “holds” at LAPL.org and saw that my borrower status was “soft block.”

So I Googled the matter and could find no info on what a “soft block” is and what I’ve done to enter this status. Previously, my borrower status was always “good”.

I want to be good. I don’t want to be soft.

PS. “Soft block” means I left my library card in the library.

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Iranian Bombs, Israeli Diplomats

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Does Your Home Health Aide Have Violent Hands?

Loren Shlaes, an Alexander Technique teacher and Occupational Therapist in New York City talks [to Robert Rickover] about ways the Alexander Technique can help Occupational Therapists.”

Loren: “An occupational therapist looks at who you are, what your life is, and all the things you have to do to fulfill all of your roles and responsibilities. If illness and injury comes along and disrupts your ability to do that, how can I help you get back to where you were before or find other things that will give you pleasure and make you feel useful.”

“Before I took Alexander lessons, I was in pain all the time and grumpy as a result. It affected my ability to do my job. After I took lessons, I became aware of how uncomfortable I was in my body. Letting some of that go improved my ability to be an effective therapist.”

“It can be a physical job. I was lifting patients all day. Every time I touched a patient was another opportunity to hurt myself.”

“When I worked with patients in bed, I would be hunched over. I would bend at the waist. And I would come home every day with a terrible back ache.

“After taking lessons, instead of bending over at my waist and hunching in my spine, I would use my legs instead to bend over and my back stopped hurting.”

“The last staff job I had at a big hospital, there would constantly be [employees] on the disabled list. They would be hurting themselves.”

Robert: “For self-protection purposes, the ability you get when you take some Alexander lessons could be very valuable for OTs.”

Loren: “I took a weekend class with Marie Stroud. The minute she put her hands on me, I was transformed.”

“If there are any OTs or PTs listening, [Alexander Technique] is a form of NDT (Neuro-Developmental Treatment). An NDT practiticioner will guide the body using a normal movement pattern.”

“I went to the American Center for the Alexander Technique in Manhattan. My school was 9-12 Monday through Friday.”

“I was working for a hand therapist in Manhattan. I was a little too over-eager to educate my patients about why they were getting their repetitive strain injuries. And she let me go. She got sick of me trying to convince people to go to Alexander and get some postural help. Please don’t sit like that. You’re killing your neck. She couldn’t bear it. So she fired me.”

“If you’re engaged in heavy physical labor all day, you’re going to learn [in Alexander lessons] how to use your body. This will protect you from getting injured.

“Because my own posture and use was so bad, I didn’t feel good in my body a lot of the time. I didn’t have a whole lot of energy. I was using my big muscles to hold myself up instead of my postural muscles. I was over-working my muscles. Once I let that go, I had tons of energy I had never experienced before. That made my work day more pleasant. I noticed I had more energy to play with the children I was treating than colleagues who were 10, 20, 30 years younger than I was. I’m in my 50s but I can still get down on the floor and play with the children. I’ll get down on a scooter board and play hockey with them.”

Robert: “I would imagine that your Alexander training affects how you contact your patients. I would imagine that the quality of your touch is much more pleasant.”

Loren: “I remember one of my patients telling me how much she hated her home health aide because this woman had very violent hands. I’ve had people tell me over and over, ‘Why is it that when you work on me, you do not hurt me? The other therapists always cause me pain.’

“When you’re touching a patient with a knowing hand, it’s a whole different experience for the patient.”

Robert: “To become an Alexander teacher is a long process. A lot of that is about learning how to use your hands in a way that’s going to be effective in helping your students, but that’s going to apply to any physical contact you make with your hands. When you touch somebody, information about your nervous system is being conveyed to them. If your nervous system is in better shape, they’re going to get something more pleasant than if you’re stiff or holding yourself rigidly.”

“Everything we’re talking about here could apply to any kind of body worker. Massage therapists are often in pain and can learn how to use their bodies more efficiently and get better results with less work.”

Loren: “If you specialize in pain management and ergonomics, it is important to know how critical someone’s posture is to change their repetitive strain problems. One hundred percent of repetitive strain injuries are posture and use related. If you’re changing a person’s work habits or you are good with your hands like I always was. I could work with somebody and take their pain away but I couldn’t teach them how to keep the pain away. If you’re interested in helping someone learn to take care of themselves, [Alexander Technique] is the way to do it.”

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Child Sex Abuse Case In Australia Comes To America

Two thoughts:

* This story illustrates why the Forward is the premiere Jewish news publication in the diaspora.

* Consider the eery parallels to the sexual molestation situation at Beis Midrash Toras HaShem in North Hollywood.

Email: The following note comes from someone close to the case:

A number of brief points about the link below to one of the most respected/influential global Jewish publications (Forward):

1. It further demonstrates the scandalous behaviour of the Yeshivah Centre in Melbourne (not that this is a revelation to many if us).

2. I would like to acknowledge the courage of Yaakov Wolf for publicly identifying himself as one of the many former victims. For those who may not be aware, Yaakov is the son of prominent Rabbi/philosopher etc Laibl Wolf. Importantly, he is also the nephew of Don Wolf, the Chairman of the Board of Directors at Yeshivah.

3. Some of you may not be aware of who Rabbi Meir Shlomo Kluwgant is. His father and numerous other relatives are and have been on the Yeshivah Executive, or hold/have held other senior leadership positions there, for many years. This may explain his odd comments at the end of the article.

THE FORWARD REPORTS:

A child sex abuse scandal in Australia’s Jewish community has spilled into America, as a pending extradition, arrests in Australia and a slew of cover-up allegations put that community’s response to molestation under scrutiny.

Australian police are seeking to extradite convicted child molester David Kramer, currently in jail in Farmington, Mo., on suspicion of having abused children at a Chabad school in Melbourne during the 1990s.
Kramer, who was reportedly spirited out of Australia by one of Melbourne’s Chabad leaders following abuse allegations, is halfway through a seven-year prison sentence for sodomizing a 12-year-old boy in St. Louis.
According to members of the Australian community, he is not the only molester to end up in the United States after Australian community leaders failed to report them to legal authorities. Other molesters fled the country more recently as suspicion of abuse fell on them, community members say.
The Forward has learned that at least two suspected molesters from the Australian Jewish community are living in the United States while they are under investigation in Australia.
Meanwhile, Manny Waks, a former vice president of the Executive Council of Australian Jewry, accused an Australian living in New York of molesting him when he was a boy.
Waks, 35, who has been the catalyst for revelations about the Melbourne abuse scandal, told the Forward he was molested by Velvel Serebryanski, son of a prominent Chabad rabbi, at two Melbourne synagogues during the late 1980s.
…Australian police are currently investigating more than a dozen Orthodox individuals suspected of child abuse in Australia, according to Joel Berman, a Los Angeles activist who has been in touch with detectives on aspects of the cases in the United States.
…Sexual abuse is difficult enough for many victims to report, but Orthodox Jewish survivors and their families often find it much harder, because of the tight-knit nature of their communities and because of concerns that they are violating religious laws such as mesirah, which prohibits reporting on a fellow Jew to secular authorities. Many are also worried about committing a chilul Hashem, a desecration of God’s name.
Some Haredi, or ultra-Orthodox, organizations, such as Agudath Israel of America, still instruct people that unless one has direct knowledge of abuse, such as being a victim himself or herself or personally witnessing such an incident, that person must consult a rabbi before reporting suspicions to the authorities.
Chabad institutions have taken a more liberal approach. A beit din, or religious court, in the Crown Heights section of Brooklyn issued a ruling around the time that the Melbourne scandal broke, telling followers who suspect abuse that they are not violating religious laws by reporting their suspicions to the police.
Nevertheless, many survivors and their families fear being kicked out of synagogues and schools, or ruining marriage opportunities because of the taint of an abuse allegation.
Smason said people are often reticent to report because they don’t want to sully Judaism’s name, “not realizing that the ultimate chilul Hashem is that these things are kept quiet — and in the process, individuals bounce from community to community.”

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Sitting In A Chair Is One Of The Worst Things You Can Do For Your Back

Loren Shlaes, an Alexander Technique teacher and Occupational Therapist in New York City talks with Robert Rickover about ways that parents can help their children develop good posture.”

Loren: “When you’re carried in a car seat, you’re moving in one plane. When you’re carried on your mother’s hip, every time your mother turns, you turn. Every time your mother bends, you bend. You have to constantly adjust your head position against gravity. That’s how you learn about your body in relation to the rest of the world. If you’re constantly strolled or carried in just one direction, you’re not going to learn about your position in space. That delays the maturation of your postural reflexes.”

Robert: “For parents — is your child spending an enormous amount of time just sitting and being moved around?”

Loren: “Everything the child knows before about the age of six comes from his physical relationship with the world. For him to know those things, he has to move through it freely. If we are impeding his ability to do that by strolling him everywhere, strapping him in a car seat, we’re denying the child an opportunity to develop his intellect and strength.”

“Get rid of the video games, turn the TV off, and organize a touch football game with the other kids in the neighborhood.”

Robert: “Furniture is chosen for schools from the point of view of what is most efficient for stacking and moving. For the custodial staff. From the perspective of different-sized children all sitting in these desks…”

Loren: “Chairs are hideously not user friendly. Societies that don’t depend on chairs don’t have back problems. Sitting in a chair is one of the worst things you can do for your back. It just encourages slumping.”

“If you are so small that your feet don’t touch the ground… There’s a postural signal that happens when your feet are flat on the floor. It sends an extensor signal up your legs and up your spine. It helps you to sit up.

“If a child is sitting with his legs dangling, he has no chance of sitting up straight.”

“Movement activates your nervous system. It allows you to be alert and aroused. Movement sends extensor tone. That gets you up against gravity. When you force a child to sit for long periods, it’s like taking the air out of a balloon. The longer they sit, the less juice they have.”

“I recently visited a kindergarten where the teacher was telling a story and she kept telling the children over and over to stop moving. Anyone with common sense would’ve said, boy, the children need to move instead of shouting at them over and over to stop moving.

“Sitting on the floor? A lot of children don’t have the postural stability to sit in that criss-cross applesauce position. They fall over. It’s uncomfortable. If they don’t have the strength to sit like that, how much attention are they going to have for what is going on in class?”

“I remember this poor child who couldn’t sit criss-cross. He compromised by sitting on his heels. The teacher refused to go on until he sat cross-legged.”

“If somebody came up to you and said, ‘Stand up straight!’, and you were not an Alexander teacher, you’d probably do some variation of pulling your head back, arching your back, squaring your shoulders, sticking out your chest, tightening your ribs and legs. And then you would think, yech, this feels terrible, and you’d just go back.”

“I would encourage parents to give their kids as much unstructured time to play as possible. I’m not talking about sending them to soccer. I’m talking to make sure they have time to go outside to play so they’re not spending their spare time outside of school slumping in front of video games and televisions.”

Loren Shlaes blogs:

How much sleep should a child get? Toddlers and preschoolers should get about twelve hours of sleep. School aged children should get about ten hours of sleep. High school students should get about eight or nine.

Less sleep than this on a regular basis can cause a host of problems, including a compromised immune system, delays in language acquisition and neurological development, socialization and learning issues, anxiety, poor attention span and frustration tolerance, emotional fragility, impulsivity, and poor self regulation.

Many of the children I treat are not very good sleepers. They have trouble transitioning to bedtime, they have a hard time falling asleep once they get in bed, they wake up during the night, and they are crabby, irritable, and hard to get going in the morning.

If your child habitually wakes up tired, cranky, and hard to get going, he is either not getting enough sleep or the sleep that he does get is not resting him properly.

Unfortunately, modern life interferes with circadian rhythms and healthy sleep patterns. We no longer spend our time out of doors using our bodies for hunting, gathering, and planting, going to bed with the chickens and waking up with the roosters. Electric lights mean that we no longer need to obey the natural rhythms of the sun and moon, retiring when it is dark and being naturally awakened by light. Staying up late to work or read before the advent of electricity was uncomfortable, a strain on the eyes, and an enormous outlay of effort and expensive fuel. Since the advent of the light bulb and cheap electricity, it is thoughtlessly easy to stay up long past the time when we should be in bed.

Loren blogs:

Many of the children I treat can’t sit still simply because they need to move their bodies. In big cities like Manhattan, children don’t have the opportunity to run around freely, and their overscheduled parents don’t make the time to take them to the park. It often takes much convincing on my part that regular unstructured time spent out of doors, either at a park, beach, or playground, is an essential priority for children, and that constantly strapping children into strollers, car seats, high chairs, play pens, and anything else that prevents them from moving and exploring freely is impeding their neurological and cognitive development.

I often go to schools for observations and leave with the feeling that the adults who are responsible for planning the children’s days don’t always schedule activities with a realistic view of what is possible and what is not.

I recently observed a second grade classroom in which the children were required to sit quietly for 90 minutes and write without a break. After about 30 minutes had gone by, the teacher was expending a lot of energy trying to get her class to stay seated and focused. Ninety minutes for a group of seven year olds is a long, long time to sit still. Another time I observed a classroom of six year olds being given a highly structured, rather uninteresting craft activity to do. After about fifteen minutes, the teacher was working mighty hard to maintain decorum. The majority of the children had long since finished their task, and were more than ready to move on, but they were required to sit there for ten more minutes. The children got more and more restive and bored, and the teacher became sterner and sterner as she tried to force the children to sit. It would have been much less toxic to give them a second task or to give everyone a one minute structured movement break.

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Novel Interpretation of the Purim Story

Joe* emails: Here is a good question for anyone with a deep understanding of Megillat Esther (the Scroll of Esther).

At the second feast prepared by Esther for the King and Haman, Esther reveals that she is a Jew and that Haman has plotted to kill her people. The King is enraged and leaves the feast to the garden. Haman pleads for mercy from Esther and while pleading with Esther, Haman falls on the bed so that when the King returns from his spell, he sees Haman, who has plotted to kill his wife’s people, actually trying to sleep with his wife. He utters a famous statement “Will you also conquer the queen with me in the house”?

Immediately Haman’s face was covered, signifying that he would be executed, but it was not clear how.

All of a sudden, into a very private party enters Charvona, “one of the king’s chamberlains” and said to the king:

“There is a gallows that Haman made for Mordecai( who spoke well for the king) standing at Haman’s house at a height of some 75 feet.”

Immediately upon getting wind of this juicy information, the King ordered Haman executed on those gallows. In a snuff, and just like that, Haman was dead and the plot to kill the Jews was decapitated. It was tantamount to killing Hitler and Himmler and their ilk with a grenade. Had Haman been allowed to linger, he might have argued his way out of sudden death and the plot against the Jews may not have been foiled.

So, the question is, how does Charvona know that Haman made the gallows explicitly for Mordecai at a height of 75 feet (did he have a measuring tape?). The gallows were constructed earlier that morning. The only people who actually know the purpose of the gallows belong to a select group, namely, Haman, his wife, and his sons/advisers (these were the people who were at the meeting at Haman’s house when the hanging of Mordecai was conceived).

So assuming Charvona was not one in that group, how did he find out the purpose of the gallows? Haman did not tell anyone, the minute he tried to tell the King he wanted to hang Mordecai, he was forced to lead Mordecai on the King’s horse, so obviously Haman knew that Mordecai was not going to be hanged that same day.

Haman’s wife would not have betrayed him and she realized as well that the plot to hang Mordecai was probably suspended.

His advisers might have told someone of the plan to kill Mordecai, but there is no evidence of that – plus there was not a lot of time to spread the word and surely, had the advisers thought the gallows was known about outside of the group, they would have taken it down because they knew the plot was suspended.

So, absent some Midrashic supernatural explanation that Charvona was in fact Elijah the Prophet, how would Charvona know. Remember the timeline.

At night following the first feast, Haman is riding high. He comes home and says that the only thing awry is Mordecai. SO his advisers tell him to make the gallows and go in the morning to the King.

So, the gallows are constructed and then Haman goes to the King and the turnabout occurs with Mordecai being led on the horse with Haman crying out in front of him that Mordecai is the King’s favorite.

He then comes back home, and his advisers tell him that if he has begun to fall before Mordecai, it will only get worse. Before plans could be made to deal with the turn of events, Haman is hurried to the feast, probably about late afternoon.

There is simply no way that any of Haman’s advisers would inform anyone of what seems to be a terrible idea to hang Mordecai.

So, again, how does Charvona seem to be such a font of information?

I have a pretty good theory, and the actual clues are part of a much larger plot encoded in certain words and phrases in the scroll. Maybe I will share that over the weekend.

* Going back to the mystery of Charvona’s incredible information gathering ability, one thing to notice is the incredible security detail the King has.

If you want to see the King, you must be invited. Just showing up to see the King, without the proper invitation, results in death.

This applies to everyone, with the only after the fact exception, perhaps, being for Esther (who got lucky and was granted an exception) and Haman, who shows up unannounced to ask to have Mordecai hanged. These are the only exceptions, and, just to show how important this security detail is, even Haman is only brought to the King’s feasts by having the “chamberlains” bring him to the King. Haman is the prime minister, but even he is only allowed to get near the King under escort of chamberlains of the King.

It is clear that the King trusts this security detail, and that these chamberlains have earned the trust of the king.

However, there was an attempted act of betrayal. Early on, two of the chamberlains responsible for monetary matters, Bigtan and Teresh, hatched a plot to kill the King. Mordecai uncovers the plot, and in what makes absolutely no sense, he tells Esther who then relays it to the King in the name of Mordecai.

Why didn’t Mordecai take this information to the King? I mean, if you learned of a plot to have the President killed, would you tell his wife? Maybe you tell some other person if you want to remain anonymous, but Esther told the King that the source was Mordecai.

Now we begin to peel the onion. Mordecai learned of a plot to kill the King from those in his innermost security detail, the chamberlains. The King was no friend of the Jews. The sources and methods of Mordecai’s information was worth its weight in gold. Clearly, Mordecai did not want the King killed – he had already installed his cousin as the queen. However, the data he obtained on the King’s security and the ability to mount an assassination plot could not be disclosed. The way to pass on the information, but only to the extent necessary to save the King, was to use Esther as a conduit. The King learned just enough to investigate the matter, which was done immediately according to the Megillah (but Mordecai is not questioned), and have the plotters killed. Mordecai was ingenious – he saved the King’s life, got credit for doing so, and apparently was never questioned as to what he knew about the methods that could be used to kill the King.

So, while the King had impressive security, Mordecai knew the lapses in the security system. And it all rested on the “chamberlains” – the Hebrew word is “sarisim” often translated as “eunuchs” these were essentially tools of the King that formed his security entourage. In fact, the term eunuch (literally one who was castrated) is apt, these are men devoted just to the King’s security, without interference by passion (such as sexual passion) and who would not betray the King.

We now know that Mordecai knows of a way to kill the King, and in a way that a chamberlain would do so without being caught (because Bigtan and Teresh obviously thought they would get away with it, suicide killings were not in vogue in pre-medieval Persia). Only if someone else ratted on the chamberlain could the chamberlain be caught, but the king’s massive security system had a hole, and Mordecai knew it.

Now, to give you a big hint, as to Charvona’s role. When did Mordecai actually threaten to have Queen Esther killed (not the King, but the Queen), and was he bluffing?

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World Of Tension

I was feeling excited about life this afternoon. I had hope. I had joy. I had walks in the sun.

And then I made the mistake of clicking my home page (the DrudgeReport.com), and found this on top:

Suddenly, my lust for life died.

This woman badly needs Alexander Technique. Her face is filled with tension.

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Playwright With Beautiful Use

This woman is lovely! I wondered if she had Alexander Technique lessons. Her loose limbs and expressive face go together with the absence of excess tension.

It’s hard to do any decent writing when you have a teaching job as this story notes:

“Teaching — for Ms. Edson at least — is a full-time occupation. She needs the summers, she said, to do nothing, because that makes you a more interesting person in the classroom, and writing on the side is too distracting. “The presence of fictional characters in your head, especially ones who talk, is extremely preoccupying,” she said. “And the nonfictional characters in my life are abundant.””

The New York Times reports:

MARGARET EDSON is the Harper Lee of playwrights. She has had just one play produced — “Wit,” which won the Pulitzer Prize in 1999 and has been revived on Broadway in a Manhattan Theater Club production starring Cynthia Nixon — and having said what she had to say, she doesn’t feel any need to try playwriting again. She occupies herself these days with projects like learning the piano and setting the multiplication table to opera choruses. She reads Dante in Italian, a canto or so every day, and once made a scale model of Paradise with the Sun-Maid raisin lady holding a basket of souls.

But Ms. Edson hasn’t entirely abandoned the theater. Her current stage — where she is the dramatist, cast, stage manager, lighting director, prop master, usher and supply clerk — is a second-floor classroom at the Inman Middle School in the Virginia Highland neighborhood here, where she teaches sixth-grade social studies.

Except for the eyes in the back of her head, which miss nothing — not even secret fiddling with a broken zipper — Ms. Edson is the kind of teacher who makes you wish you could go back and repeat middle school. In a commencement address she gave at Smith College in 2008 she called teaching a “physical, breath-based event, eye to eye,” which is another way of saying it’s a performance. She is a very tall, slender, loose-limbed woman with a wide expressive mouth, and she works the classroom like a tummler. She mugs, does voices, makes big arm gestures and frequently pauses for dramatic effect.

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