Category Archives: Personal

My Sore Stomach

Posted on September 1, 2009 by Luke Ford

"Do you have any thoughts on stomach aches?" I ask my Alexander Technique teacher today. "When do you get them?" he asks. "When I start worrying. I find myself clenching." "Well, what would you say to a friend with this … Continue reading →

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Everyone Asks Me If I’m Jewish

Posted on September 1, 2009 by Luke Ford

I wear a yarmulke and tzitzit and a beard and people still ask me if I’m Jewish. I don’t get it. I’m the Jewiest Jew around. Is it my Aryan looks? Is there something off about my demeanor? Is my … Continue reading →

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‘Don’t You Want To Marry Someone Jewish?’

Posted on August 29, 2009 by Luke Ford

Havdalah. Four hot chix hold the candle. My friend Susie* says, "Raise it up high to the height of your bashert." She turns to me and says, "How tall are you?" She raises her hand to the height of the … Continue reading →

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Saturday Night I Crashed Their Party

Posted on August 29, 2009 by Luke Ford

I noticed three women in their twenties move next door Thursday. On my way to shul for Shalosh Sheudos this afternoon, I noticed a party beginning there. "I’m gonna crash it!" I resolved. I’m gonna overcome my fears and I’m … Continue reading →

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Vishnu Luke Visits First Happy Minyan Banquet

Posted on August 27, 2009 by Luke Ford

Behind my computer keyboard, I feel like Vishnu. I feel like the All-Pervading essence, the master of—and beyond—the past, present and future, the creator and destroyer of all existences, one who supports, sustains and governs the Universe and originates and … Continue reading →

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Faux Calls For Dialogue

Posted on August 26, 2009 by Luke Ford

Lawrence Grossman writes in the Forward: "Is it too much to hope that it also might encourage steps toward renewing respectful dialogue between Orthodox and non-Orthodox Jews?" When I was interviewing people in 2004 for my book on American Jewish … Continue reading →

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Fireproof

Posted on August 26, 2009 by Luke Ford

I just watched this hokey Christian melodrama about saving your marriage through practicing the 40-Day Love Dare. If you want to save your relationship, try watching this movie together and discussing it. If you are not a Christian, skip the … Continue reading →

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It’s Better Than Sleeping Alone

Posted on August 26, 2009 by Luke Ford

Tuesday. 9:30 pm. My yoga teacher reminds us of the next morning’s celebration of Yogi Bhajan‘s 80th birthday. It begins at 2:40 with Japji. I’m not the kind of guy who likes to miss Japji. I am so excited by … Continue reading →

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‘I Can’t Talk To You Anymore’

Posted on August 25, 2009 by Luke Ford

I said that to a woman this year after we had been very close. I was that hurt after learning she had been with someone else when I had thought she was all mine. Guru Singh (formerly Gerry Pond) says: … Continue reading →

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Torah Lessons

Posted on August 24, 2009 by Luke Ford

When I won’t send the requisite emails begging for payment, my boss says, "Fine. I’ll pay you in Torah lessons."

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