Category Archives: Personal

The Goy

Posted on June 19, 2012 by Luke Ford

6:15 a.m. I’m studying Torah with the rabbi. There’s a loud knocking at the front door. I get up grumpily and walk to the door and open it. There’s a goy outside. A female goy. A shiksa. She looks latina … Continue reading →

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I Can’t Drink Coffee

Posted on June 19, 2012 by Luke Ford

If I drink more than a cup of regular coffee, I get jittery, anxious and don’t sleep well. I toss and turn and curse my fate. I might even get up and blog in the early morning hours. I must … Continue reading →

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Six Days Shomer Brit!

Posted on June 18, 2012 by Luke Ford

I realize I used to store up eroticized rage scenarios through the day to treasure during alone time. Now no treasuring. I wonder how this will change me? I went about 15 months in 1990-1991 as I got into Judaism. … Continue reading →

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He Left It All On The Field

Posted on June 18, 2012 by Luke Ford

“If you keep writing as you’re writing, will you accomplish the things you want to accomplish in the rest of your life?” his therapist asked him. He thought about that for a long time and finally, reluctantly, quietly, answered, “no.” … Continue reading →

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‘You’ve Put Me In A Very Awkward Position’

Posted on June 16, 2012 by Luke Ford

There are certain phrases I keep hearing throughout my life, such as “You’re not welcome here.” And then I appeal for help and I hear, “You’ve put me in a very awkward position.” The themes of my life — provocation, … Continue reading →

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