Israel’s New York Times

Jason Maoz — the most underrated writer in the Jewish media — writes for The Jewish Press:

It takes a time like this for the full fury of Israel’s leftists to erupt in the face of their own country and government. While it’s true that, at least for now, Israel’s anti-Hamas offensive has garnered widespread domestic support, that’s hardly been the case among the country’s left-wing elite.

Many of the Monitor’s readers may have read some of the op-ed pieces that have appeared in Haaretz since the Gaza operation began, and it’s not exactly news that the Israeli daily is a hothouse of far-left sensibilities (hence its popularity among foreign journalists and pro-Palestinian bloggers).

But to truly get an appreciation for the depths of pathology routinely exhibited by Haaretz’s opinion columnists, one needs to look at several days’ worth of their work product. Drowning out the occasional token centrist or rightist perspective are waves of anti-Israel invective of which the following is just a representative sampling. Read it and weep.

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Bibliyoga With Marcus F. Freed

Here is his site Bibliyoga.com. I met Marcus at LimmudLA last February. Video.

We started our conversation at Jeff’s Gourmet Sunday evening. It was cold and windy.

Marcus: "Bibliyoga is a body-soul workout….[connecting] spirituality to the body. "

Luke: "Can straight people do this too?"

Marcus: "It’s for everyone who wants that sense of eternal peace, healing and oneness."

Luke: "When did you get into yoga?"

Marcus: "It was about six years ago."

Loud speaker: "Marcus, your order is ready."

Marcus runs a lot of classes for men-only, "making men feel comfortable with their own bodies. …Not having to do difficult hip openers, at least at the beginning. …One problem with many exercise classes is that they make people feel less comfortable with their bodies, but this is about peace at every level."

Luke: "Men-only classes? I thought the whole point of yoga was to meet women?"

Marcus: "The whole point of yoga is to feel some enlightenment, to feel at one."

Luke: "So you don’t have to meet women to feel whole?"

Marcus: "There is an ancient yoga principle of modesty. It’s not about meeting people. It’s about meeting yourself…and through that conversation, that’s how we meet God. Through the breath, through the silence, through the calm…"

Luke: "I associate Brits with cynicism, but you’re not cynical. I don’t understand."

Marcus: "Why do you think I’m here in Los Angeles?"

Luke: "You don’t associate Brits with this more heartfelt form of communication."

Marcus: "There is a time and a place for cynicism and irony. The place isn’t America. There are good vibes here and positive energy and openness. Britain is opening up slowly."

"Here there’s much more freedom to be out and accepted."

"Spirituality is moving outside the traditional church/synagogue structure. People are looking for spirituality within physical-related things. It’s very exciting digging into the Bible, the Talmud, the Zohar and seeing all these physical references. The other thing I’m working on is one-man Biblical plays, comedies. I’ve been touring with them for around ten years now. There’s Solomon — King, Poet, Lover. Elijah, a story of prophet and loss, looking at sustainability and famine and drought issues. My latest play is The Madness of King Saul.

"I did my first one in the December of 1999 at the Limmud conference in the UK."

Luke: "How long did it take you to write that?"

Marcus: "Three months and twenty years."

Luke: "When did you get into Judaism?"

Marcus: "I was eight days old and I had a collision with a knife."

"I was raised traditional and I became more interested around age 19 at university. It was time to begin putting pieces together. It’s very much a journey. Sometimes it is more intense, sometimes it is less intense. It’s very much a relationship. It’s for the long term. There are fluctuating levels of feeling, but it is something I find grounding. It feels quite American to speak about this."

Luke: "Americans call this sharing."

Marcus: "The British don’t speak this way."

"In America, there’s this can-do attitude. That a president can get elected on the affirmation ‘Yes, we can!’ In England it would be, ‘Maybe we can. Let’s speak next week.’"

Luke: "I conceive of Orthodox Judaism as very traditional and not receptive to creativity. There’s the old joke, ‘How many Orthodox Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Change? We never change.’ So how receptive have you found Orthodox Jewish life to these creative things you’re doing?"

Marcus: "When people are comfortable in the source material and in their own skin, incredibly positive."

Luke: "And how often do you encounter that?"

Marcus: "On occasion."

"Look, it is the community I am aligned with and live with. It’s all good. Things are changing."

Luke: "How much stand-up comedy do you do?"

Marcus: "I try to minimize it."

Luke: "Why?"

Marcus: "Because it’s scary."

Luke: "Could anything be more scary?"

Marcus: "Possibly bungy-jumping without bungy."

Luke: "My LimmudLA experience was at the top of all my experiences in life and in Judaism. To me, it was the greatest thing I have ever experienced in Judaism."

Marcus: "That’s going to end up on their PR."

Luke: "No. They would never quote me. No established Jewish group will ever quote me."

Marcus: "Limmud is at the top of my Jewish experience to date because it empowered and enabled and allowed me to present my new work in a very supportive atmosphere."

The phone rings. I disconnect it. "That was a friend," I say. "We were going to discuss the relative hotness of [Dennis Prager’s] ex-wives."

Marcus rolls his eye.

Luke: "That’s because I haven’t done yoga and I am not spiritually developed enough to…"

Marcus: "I’m glad I’m on a classy blog."

Luke: "We thought that one of them looked like Keira Knightly."

Marcus, impatient: "OK!"

Luke: "Sorry. We are going to elevate, elevate, elevate."

"So where are you headed?"

Marcus: "I’m headed forward."

Luke: "Was there a moment…when you felt like you discovered your life mission?"

Marcus: "Yes. I was four years old and we were doing a school play of The Nutcracker Suite and I was playing a toy soldier. I had a black fuzzy busby hat and a red military jacket and I was holding a plastic sword and we were hiding behind a castle. And just before we popped up to start waving the swords, I thought, this is what I want to do for the rest of my life. Not waving swords and fighting…"

Luke: "But acting."

Marcus: "Communicating with people. Helping people feel good."

Luke: "Where were you in your youth in the social pecking order?"

Marcus: "Surely that should be obvious. Completely on the outside, too shy to speak to girls. And not cool. Very uncool."

Luke: "Do you think that coming from that is part of your desire to communicate?"

Marcus: "When people aren’t going down the conventional route, it is easy to get socially excluded as a teenager. Or when people aren’t leading a conventional lifestyle, it is easy to feel different from everyone around you. Unless you’re living in California. If I connected better with people in real life, I wouldn’t nearly be as driven to blog."

Luke: "I know that my desire to write comes largely from social failure. If I connected better with people in real life, I would not be as driven to blog. I was not at the center of the cool kids when I was in school."

Marcus: "Cool is over-rated."

Luke: "Are you sure?"

Marcus: "Yeah! One of the beauties of growing up is feeling more comfortable and knowing that everyone’s got their match, got their place, and it is just a matter of finding where you feel comfortable and what’s right for you."

Luke: "Did your parents worry about how you were going to make a living?"

Marcus: "They still do. I do."

Marcus finds that his one-act plays are significantly better received by audiences that speak English.

Marcus: "I feel like we’re sensing our closing question. Nearly?

"The interviewer is currently stroking his beard."

Luke: "I’m thinking."

Marcus: "Don’t think too hard. Just let it happen."

Luke: "Out of all the things you do, what do you think you do best?"

Marcus: "Listen."

Luke: "OK. That didn’t work."

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Luke Ford’s Essays

Air Supply
Blogging (Jewish)
Dildos of Shame
Female Journalists
Gay Mafia
General Assembly of United Jewish Communities 2006
Gossip
Hollywood Foreign Press Association
Hollywood Jews
Entertainment Journalism
Ethical Monotheism
I Remember Me (Documentary)
Illegal Immigration Conference
Impurity
Interviewing
Jewish Journalism
Jewish Literature
Kalamazoo?
Liberty Film Festival
Luke’s Kehilla
Media Bias
National Enquirer
Pornischers
Producers
Rabbinic Sex Abuse
Right-Wing Comedy
Skid Row Policing
Orthodox Union
XXXChurch

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Luke Ford Profiles

Here are some of my interviews:

Shelby Steele
Eliot Stein
Stephen Steinlight
Jared Paul Stern
Jay Stern
Steve Stern
Tiffany Stone
Teresa Strasser
Neil Strauss
Nancy Rubin Stuart
Avrohom Stulberger
John O. Sullivan
Wafa Sultan
Ronald Suppa
Kara Swisher
Eddie Tabash
Sylvio Tabet
Alexander Tabrizi
Tom Tancredo
Sheldon Teitelbaum
Joseph Telushkin
Aron Tendler
Mordecai Tendler
Tendlers
Kevin Thomas
Andrea Thompson
Johnathan Tobin
Bill Todman Jr
Michael Tolkin
Michael Tollin
Serge Trifkovic
Tom Tugend
David Twersky
Harry Ufland
John Quinn
David Valdes
Alisa Valdes-Rodriguez
Ladd Vance
Heather Veitch
Jason Venokur
Antonio Villaraigosa
Paula Wagner
Jeff Wald
Dean Wakefield
Ayelet Waldman
Amy Wallace
Bumble Ward
Teresa Watanabe
Sharon Waxman
Katharine Weber
Steven Weil
Bernard Weinraub
Harvey Weinstein
Steven I. Weiss
Jeffrey Wells
Jay Weston
Riley Weston
Suzy Wetlaufer
Steve Sex Whacko
Leon Wieseltier
Ken Wilber
Paul Wilkes
Warren Wilson
Gary Winick
Irwin Winkler
Lauren Winner
Steven J. Wolfe
Jeremy Hershy Worch
Marvin Worth
Brad Wyman
Yori Yanover
Tamar Yellin
Yggdrasil
Toby Young
Larry Yudelson
Bryce Zabel
Richard Zanuck
Sam Zell
Frank von Zerneck
Sender Zeyv
Shelley Zimmerman
Laura Ziskin
Donald Zuckerman

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I Apologize For Being Happy

I do my best writing and my most voluminous writing (these are related because when I write a lot, some of it is good) when I feel angry and isolated.

This past week, I felt happy. Ergo, I did not blog much.

Every week day, I studied Alexander Technique for three hours. Every day, I took a yoga class (average length was 90 minutes). I took a gratuitous drive up the PCH Thursday night and walked on the beach. I took a Torah class. I went to acupuncture three times. I was social. I made new friends. I felt good.

I didn’t much feel like writing.

Sorry.

I’m sure my happiness is just a passing phase and I will soon get back to being mean and miserable and prolific.

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Is Yoga For Fags?

Chaim Amalek emails: "I sense a new enthusiasm that is likely to pull you away from the rabbinate and Judaism. Also, yoga and women are for fags."

Khunrum emails: "Amalek, I applaud whatever comes next, be it Yoga or Alexander, because the expiration date has long passed on Luke’s Hebrew shtick. Everyone knows that, especially the Jews who have never taken him seriously. Matter of fact he’s been as welcome in the Jewish Community as a Palestinian with dynamite strapped to his waist. Move On."

Fred emails: ""Women are for fags?" Is there something I’m not getting?"

At my yoga center Friday afternoon, I chatted with a Sikh bloke who told me about his plans to go to a Gospel Shabbat Temple Sinai that night.

I love America. Let’s go study with the rebbe at the ashram.

Max emails: "Luke, since you were an expert in the business perhaps you can answer this question: how much does the average webmaster make producing original content? i.e. like mattsmodels, or burningangel? i ask because i have been taking photos of naked girls (with id and release) and now want to cash in so i can donate some money to kollels and yeshivas. let me know if you have any kind of metrics in this area. thank you."

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Pico-Robertson’s Don Etra Goes To Bat For Client Accused Of Murder

From the Los Angeles Times:

In the filing, lawyer Donald Etra wrote that further investigation and forensic tests were required to determine the facts, but his summary of the alleged crime suggested Jassy may contend that Osnes played a more aggressive role than authorities have said. The lawyer labeled the incident a “fight” and said Osnes was “angry that his way was partially blocked” and had “pounded his fists on [Jassy’s] vehicle.”

Osnes was an inch taller than Jassy, according to jail and coroner’s records, but Jassy outweighed him by about 40 pounds. Jassy “has never been in trouble before, and, never in his wildest dreams did he ever think he would find himself in jail, especially for an offense as serious as this one,” his attorney wrote.

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The Guru and the Earthquake

I did Kundalini Yoga last night from 6 – 10 pm.

At 7:47 pm, I was in a jammed class (about 100 people) led by the Guru.

As the earthquake rolled through, I turned to the woman next to me for the first time, lifted my eyebrows, and said in my most profound voice, "Earthquake?"

It’s the best pickup line for such situations.

Anyway, the earthquake did not phase the Guru. He just kept on guruing. He didn’t miss a beat. He just kept leading us to spiritual enlightenment.

I’m still blissed out.

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Cathy Seipp Did Not Respond To My Friend Request

In her final days, Cathy Seipp did not respond to my Facebook friend request. She’s friends with Maia and Ashley and Tony and Christian but not me. Typical.

As my boss friendly reminds me when he does not like my work ethic, "Cathy never liked you."

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Andrew Sullivan & The Jews

I stopped reading Sullivan regularly when he wouldn’t get off his gay marriage kick (and there were those revelations about his personal ads, oy, couldn’t get that stuff out of my mind).

My attorney Justin Levine blogs:

First I was baffled by his continued tirade against male circumcision, even after strong scientific and medical evidence developed to show that it helps prevent a disease that has killed millions (including many of Sullivan’s own friends).

Then I grew frustrated by his emphasis on “proportionality” theory with regards to Israel’s current battle against Hamas in Gaza. My frustration stemmed not only from its flawed reasoning, and the complete malleability of the philosophy which renders it irrelevant in this instance, but also from the fact that I couldn’t seem to find in depth discussions of “proportionality” from Sullivan in the past with regards to other conflicts around the world – only when the Jews seem to be involved.

But I was REALLY forced to do a double take today when Sullivan seemed to put the blame on “Zionism” for a “constant state of war”. Am I misinterpreting him here? Read his post and decide for yourself. 

Abe Greenwald joins the international Jewish conspiracy to decipher Sullivan’s thoughts here, along with unearthing Sullivan’s contradictory views from an earlier era. Very insightful (on Abe Greenwald’s part).

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