I’m Live On My Cam With A BBW Who Wants To Share Religious Rituals With Me!

I’m chatting with 18yo Emma from Ireland and the publisher of a Jewish newspaper in the MId-West.

Join the conversation.

Jeff emails: "I tried for a few minutes to read through the pdf files about c-cubed india, which sounds more like the name of a porn star, but I guess the issue was more simple, so yes, I can’t believe anyone allowed that a rabbi would serve as a dayan in the case of his son, that’s usually not allowed. Not that anyone cares anymore, the whole point of much of chareidi activity, particularly in the baal teshuva world, is to delegitimate learned discussion and simply have everyone follow the words of "the Rabbis". This started in earnest fairly recently, with the ArtScrolls (when they declared R. Steinsaltz’s competing Talmud not frum enough for their own economic reasons) and has become a major cancer in Jewish life, and it is similar to what Cheney tried to do for the executive branch of the US govt. As your friend pointed out, this was never true in Jewish life before. (the Cleves Get story is a poignant example of how it used to be that in every city the rabbis would have different views that could be debated and dissented from. And those were days that Rabbis actually knew how to study and read texts, not like today where its all about dressing like a 20s gangster and belonging to a certain political camp)."

YourMoralLeader:  I’m not like other men who are so visually driven and hounded by their base urges
YourMoralLeader:  Emma, you are the queen of my chat room. Anyone you want booted, you just say the word!
Emma:  Lol
Emma:  Thats your job Luke
YourMoralLeader:  I want to protect your virtue!
Emma:  lol… thanks 🙂
Emma:  Nice shirt
guest6:  You  really do this.  On webcam all the time? – Wow
Emma:  hehe
guest6:  I read your book "Yesterday’s news tomorrow."
guest6:  I enjoyed it.
guest6:  I am a publisher of a Jewish paper in the midwest.
YourMoralLeader:  wow
YourMoralLeader:  very cool
guest6:  Do you make any money from your books?
YourMoralLeader:  Can we do an interview for my blog about your experiences in Jewish journalism?
YourMoralLeader:  Very little
YourMoralLeader:  Sum total from all five, less than $3000
guest6:  Or is it more from your "industry" work?
YourMoralLeader:  I’ve made most of my money from writing on porn, yes.
YourMoralLeader:  But quit that six months ago.
Emma:  lol
YourMoralLeader:  so now I live off credit cards
guest6:  I may not be the best one for this. I am not Alana Newhouse.
YourMoralLeader:  and escort work!
YourMoralLeader:  how many papers you print each week?
YourMoralLeader:  yeah, she’s hot and funny
guest6:  I started the paper here. It competes with a PR rag.
YourMoralLeader:   how many papers you print each week?
guest6:  I come out twice a month.  It sucks. I am the pub, the editor, the layout designer and many time reporter of breaking news
GUAPO:  what it do!
guest6:  We are a small two person operation. I am considering getting out of it.  the "Calling" is gone.
guest6:  I am also a member of the local Orthodox community, so I enjoyed your observations.
GUAPO:  yo feelin well today luke?
YourMoralLeader:  6, it is a tough road, not much $$$
GUAPO:  yeah luke i felt that anger in you yesterday son
GUAPO:  it was real disapointing to find you in that condition
guest6:  What type of girl you looking for?  You are a hard shidach I am sure.
RussianDragon:  one will happen to you luke i can feel it
guest6:  You have plenty of time to grow a beard in the coming weeks.
GUAPO:  so luke you bone any b**ches lately?
RussianDragon:  lol
GUAPO:  my girl laronda feel you luke.. she wanna hook up
RussianDragon:  static is better
guest6:  static
YourMoralLeader:  6, how long you been publishing this paper?
GUAPO:  she real fine
GUAPO:  she look like tyra bank only poor
guest6:  Midwestern Orthodox women probably not for you
GUAPO:  yo luke you real cheerful today
guest6:  Shomer Negiah?
YourMoralLeader:  Emma, r u shomer negiah?
Emma:  Yes
GUAPO:  luke you you bone a porno chick?
YourMoralLeader:  a half dozen, guapo, but I was a different man then
GUAPO:  i done boned a chick who was in my local porno shop manager
SanitationEngineer:  Levi Ben Avraham, do you which sanatation engineer this is?
guest6:  Well, I got to go.  Now that I know you are here. I may return.  I can’t promise you anything about a girl.
RussianDragon:  HI EMMAAAAAAAA
GUAPO:  luke how old that picture where you look real different
GUAPO:  name one porno slut  you was bangin luke
SanitationEngineer:  Luke…….
guest6:  Good meeting oyu too.  Take care.
YourMoralLeader:  Kitten Natividad, Kimberly Kummings, Kendra Jade, Hayley Rivers, Holly Randall
SanitationEngineer:  you didn’t answer my qwestion…
YourMoralLeader:  dunno
Emma:  Lol Luke
RussianDragon:  take your lithium and put your helmet on
GUAPO:  yeah the one wheree you look real proper
Emma:  And the list goes ooooooooooooooooon
YourMoralLeader:  I was a different man then Emma. I’ve changed. No longer boning sluts.
SanitationEngineer:  I am trying to sanitize the behavior of Rabbis in the hood…………
YourMoralLeader:  Thank G-d
GUAPO:  2 years old??? nigga i thought that was like 20 years ago

VladTheImpaler:  me thinks my morals are to far down in the gutter to be lead any where
CaptainObvious:  you can always be lifted up vlad, it’s never too late
User FidelGoldstein changed their name to BBW.
VladTheImpaler:  at least in the gutter you cant fall any further
CaptainObvious:  below the gutter, there is the sewer, but don’t go there
BBW:  BBW here, looking for an age appropriate man to date.  Who here measures up?
BBW:  This man with the beard looks like my level.
BBW:  I think we could be a good match.  I’m an alluring BBW who takes no guff.
BBW:  I’m so sick of men who think they are still boys.
VladTheImpaler:  hey luke looks like you’ve pulled
BBW:  I want a man who appreciates a robusto woman, a woman’s woman who is all woman.
BBW:  Luke, do you like fine dining?
BBW:  Because I do.
BBW:  Also, deep conversations.
BBW:  How deeply can you converse with a real woman?
BBW:  Why would I want a snail when there are so many snakes in the garden?
YourPersonalAdvisor:  To be a moral leader, you must have moral fiber each and every day.
YourPersonalAdvisor:  Fred Thomison has a lot of moral fiber.
BBW:  Too much moral fiber, and you have bowel problems.
VladTheImpaler:  lol
YourPersonalAdvisor:  But didn’t have the strength to press his presidency luck
BBW:  If I deigned to date you, I would make a man of you
YourPersonalAdvisor:  Too much moral fiber cause cause human growth on your face instead of you ass.
BBW:  NO more playing with yourself or toying with the affection of inappropriate girls
BBW:  To begin with, this music will change
BBW:  I prefer Dave Mathews
VladTheImpaler:  bugger off bbw i like inappropriate girls
YourPersonalAdvisor:  Music is very soothing.  It’s a lot better than the christains music called THE DONUTMAN
BBW:  I’m not looking for a gay pervert, but a real man whowill appreciate me
BBW:  Also, I am Jewish
VladTheImpaler:  yep lik i said bbw a man with a big dick
BBW:  I want to share the religious rituals together
Emma:  You sound desperate
BBW:  Every other day I will wrap the leather around MY arms, and you will clean house
VladTheImpaler:  i do religious rituals.  chopping heads of goats and abusing virgins
BBW:  I will use my mighty lulav to discipline you if I catch you looking at another
BBW:  I will make you sit on an esrog
BBW:  We will study the Talmud together
DoooDaaa:  wrf
User guest58 left the room.
BBW:  Also, I am a former Bais Yakov girl
VladTheImpaler:  lmao
BBW:  With a degree in social services
BBW:  I also expect you to get a real job
DoooDaaa:  and a red neck
VladTheImpaler:  a blow job ??
BBW:  Or to give really great back rubs
YourMoralLeader:  I want someone to pay my rent
YourMoralLeader:  I’ll compromise on the rest
BBW:  And enough with that smiling
YourPersonalAdvisor:  Pay your rent. What kind of Jewish Commandor are you?
BBW:  If I accept you into my life, rent will be no consideration
YourMoralLeader:  i like this
YourMoralLeader:  i need some discipline
DoooDaaa:  are u gay bbw?
YourPersonalAdvisor:  I better report this to your General Massage.
Emma:  lol
BBW:  I have a Ford Escort that I will let you drive
BBW:  1989 model runs well enough for you
YourPersonalAdvisor:  Only gay people choose old models.
BBW:  I wish you were here with me so that I could show you the way of life
BBW:  It was not old when I bought it used
BBW:  Old models for old people.
YourPersonalAdvisor:  You are old.
BBW:  That’s why my old Escort is just the car Luke needs
YourPersonalAdvisor:  You account is about to expire.
YourPersonalAdvisor:  That’s why you’re old.
YourMoralLeader:  I’m tempted
BBW:  YOu should be tempted
YourPersonalAdvisor:  You need to re-register on moral leader site to get his forgiveness.
BBW:  I am raw woman.
DoooDaaa:  ?
BBW:  Do you like oysters?
Emma:  lmfao
YourMoralLeader:  no
BBW:  We could eat them together and have long walks along the beach as we plan our future together
YourPersonalAdvisor:  BBW = Barbra Bushu White
VladTheImpaler:  bbw how do you feel about sex
BBW:  I want to sit on your face.  Bush against bush.
YourPersonalAdvisor:  Raw women has good raw materials.
YourMoralLeader:  I’m just a boy
BBW:  I do not shave. It disgusts me that women do.
Emma:  lol!!
BBW:  God made me with a very hairy bush and legs
BBW:  And that’s how things will stay
VladTheImpaler:  i like what women do
guest57:  lmao
BBW:  But I expect you to shave your chest
DoooDaaa:  god help me
YourPersonalAdvisor:  When they do jumping jack, you can hear their "others" make noise.  It sould like a seal skipping on ice.
BBW:  Although you don’t seem like the sort who has a hairy chest
BBW:  Show us your chest NOW
guest57:  lmao
Emma:  lmao
BBW:  Also, if you have man breasts, then you will have to go on a diet.
BBW:  Fat is natural on a woman, disgusting on a man
BBW:  Ashelf of fat on the lower abdomen effectively shortens the penis, concerning which, I have additional requirements
YourPersonalAdvisor:  Also it could sound like a Ketchup Bottle that is nearly empty.  Trying to get that last ketchup on the buns. Mmmmmmmmmmm  Thats sound like old fart.
BBW:  I will need you to dress better before I let you meet my many fabulous friends
YourPersonalAdvisor:  I advise you to start eating "Total" which give you 100 percent Fiber.
BBW:  I assume you are gay friendly, which is essential
YourPersonalAdvisor:  It’ll also give you 100 iron but that only for you ass because I’m about the boot you soon.
BBW:  You also need a haircut
BBW:  And a real job, like paralegal
YourPersonalAdvisor:  If your ass was 100 percent iron, you would go far.. So you lucky to stay.
YourPersonalAdvisor:  Allow me to give you my blessing.
YourMoralLeader:  Thank you
CaptainObvious:  watch out Luke, I think BBW is a Domme
YourPersonalAdvisor:  Dear Lord.  I blame BBW for making the movie "THE PASSION"  Please give those jews as we set BBW an example of wrongfully develope human.
BBW:  I am Rubenesque, I am the woman men really want
BBW:  Not stick figurines.
BBW:  Emma, he’s old enough to be your grandpa
YourPersonalAdvisor:  Please give BBW a guiding light to the bathroom because I can smell fart from my distance.
BBW:  Real women have curves
BBW:  I am a woman with curves in all the right places
les:  hi yourmoralleader.in bangor,wales,8o miles from manchester u stated u had visited free with your work?
Emma:  You wanna take this outside BBW?
CaptainObvious:  she’ll sit on you and win emma
YourPersonalAdvisor:  Real women?!?!?  Real women sags don’t hangs like a grandfather clock and they don’t drowl on their key board.
BBW:  Men seem to like me.  Try generous.net, and you will see there is an entire web site dedicated to the adoration of women like me
YourMoralLeader:  Les,
YourMoralLeader:  I lived in manchester 18 months
YourMoralLeader:  1970-71
BBW:  I have no shortage of men, but I want a Jewish man I can mold into the man I want him to be
BBW:  Luke seems putty-like
DoooDaaa:  generous.net  ffs
YourMoralLeader:  true
YourPersonalAdvisor:  If men like you, then why are you on here?  A computer is not a man.. It’s Man…ufactured products.
User guest57 left the room.
CaptainObvious:  hardy har har
Emma:  Get your pottery wheel out then
BBW:  I see myself locking Luke in the closet when he is not working, servicing my sexual needs, or cleaning the house
BBW:  His pole is not long enough to do the job right
DoooDaaa:  looks like he woud make someone a good wife someday
YourPersonalAdvisor:  Look what you did BBW, you crap over the floor like a leaping hippo.  Shame on you sumo!
BBW:  You just know there are bedbugs in that place
YourMoralLeader:  I’m good at cleaning house
BBW:  I will dress you up in a nice maid’s outfit
Emma:  lmao
BBW:  And you will like it
YourMoralLeader:  You are right
BBW:  alas, I cannot buy you a longer pole
les:  you said u would like to visit uk again any plans when
BBW:  We will daven together on Shabbos, hand in hand
BBW:  We will have a women rabbi
BBW:  And Luke, you will go to the mikvah with me
BBW:  At night, I will stun you with my loving charms
BBW:  He will forget all about you when my musky scent fills his nostrils
BBW:  I’m glad to see that you are gay friendly, Luke
BBW:  Musky was my senator years ago
BBW:  I don’t think you are serious about being a Jewish man.
BBW:  A real Jewish man weds a real Jewish woman, which is what I am
DoooDaaa:  by the way fearless leader wheres that little beany thing u guys wear?
DoooDaaa:  on ur head
DoooDaaa:  cover up the bald spot
BBW:  That’s not remotely Jewish music
BBW:  So few of your choices in life are truly Jewish
morallyCORRUPT:  HOW FUKKING HARD DO I HAVE TO BLAST YOU, TO HAVE YOU BAN ME????!!!!!!
BBW:  Three hours with me will fix 90% of what is wrong with you and most men in the world
Lilithena:  Can we talk about nice things?  Spring is in the air
morallyCORRUPT:  ’cause this dude’s clearly a kook.
Lilithena:  I could do a paper on this
DoooDaaa:  that profile reminds me of PeeWee Herman
Lilithena:  Could someone fill me in on who is fighting with whom here?
Emma:  Nobody is fighting
DoooDaaa:  hey BBW ever been caught pleasuring urself in the closet?
BBW:  It is men who are in the closet who ask inane questions like that.  If and when I want to pleasure myself, I do it unashamedly
BBW:  The only question I have for luke is this: do you have the raw material with which to be worth my time?
BBW:  Because having had the real thing, pigs in a blanket will no longer do it for me
Emma:  Well…storms over
Lilithena:  I’m taking notes here
Lilithena:  I will write a paper on this for my psych class
BBW:  Look at him…..he thinks he is the c**k of the walk but he is c**k of nothing
BBW:  Boy-males like him are why so many terrific women out there are still single
BBW:  OMG, are you HOMOPHOBIC?
YourMoralLeader:  Why Do All Plays These Days Feature Either Gays, Jews Or AIDS?
User DoooDaaa left the room.
BBW:  Because that is a deal breaker for me
BBW:  I have many gay friends
BBW:  I’m leaving now.  You are not for me

YourMoralConfusion:  stuntman upping the calibre of discourse around here
GiaJordan:  I know Holly’s favorite movie is star wars
YourMoralConfusion:  ignore me
YourMoralConfusion:  i’m having my period
YourMoralConfusion:  im having a midol moment
StuntmanBurt:  I was only asking…….what’s a moral leader tho’
YourMoralConfusion:  star wars?
YourMoralConfusion:  oy gevalt
YourMoralConfusion:  such a goyische movie
GiaJordan:  (laughing)
GiaJordan:  Brad Pitt fan?
YourMoralConfusion:  blech
StuntmanBurt:  true
StuntmanBurt:  But your supposed to lead??
YourMoralConfusion:  luke recite one of your prayers in hebrew for us
YourMoralConfusion:  i’m keen to learn
YourMoralConfusion:  those funny little letters
YourMoralConfusion:  they are quite amusing
StuntmanBurt:  You can speak hewbrew?
GiaJordan:  If Holly went on a diet would you take her back?
YourMoralConfusion:  YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YourMoralConfusion:  FTW!!!!!!
Emma:  wow
Emma:  lol
StuntmanBurt:  Is that Jewish??
StuntmanBurt:  Me
YourMoralConfusion:  yes
YourMoralConfusion:  it’s ‘jewish’
GiaJordan:  yes I live in LA
YourMoralConfusion:  are LA jews different than NY jews?
YourMoralConfusion:  are they more laid back?
YourMoralConfusion:  less intense?
StuntmanBurt:  Can you stop playing that, I have to stand up, everytime you play it!!
YourMoralConfusion:  smoke more pot?
YourMoralConfusion:  LOL @ stuntman
StuntmanBurt:  In fact, show some respect! stand up!!!!
GiaJordan:  I talked to holly today and she misses you Luke
YourMoralConfusion:  are those bottle filled with urine?
janice:  lol whats he doing?
User guest73 left the room.
YourMoralConfusion:  exercise
Emma:  Lol Janice Luke could teach you a thing or too about excercise
StuntmanBurt:  This should be Take you to my Leader!
GiaJordan:  Old people drink grape juice
StuntmanBurt:  me
janice:  hahahahahaha lol
Emma:  lol
janice:  he is funny
YourMoralConfusion:  lol they dont’ want to break a sweat
janice:  hahahahahahahahahahahaha
YourMoralConfusion:  that’s so funny
StuntmanBurt:  That guy f**ked up!………..ummmmmmm! you made me swear!
GiaJordan:  He used to make Holly exercise when they were dating
YourMoralConfusion:  he made holly exercise?
StuntmanBurt:  Your scaring me!
GiaJordan:  yeah he said she was getting too heavy
YourMoralConfusion:  would you make holly shave her  head and wear a wig if you married her luke?
janice:  hahahahahah
YourMoralConfusion:  that’s the orthodox way
janice:  right on luke!
janice:  this site is so funny
YourMoralConfusion:  how about intercourse in a hole in the sheet
YourMoralConfusion:  i do that now and i’m not even a jew
Emma:  Lol Jan
janice:  wow he is really moving
Emma:  lmao
YourMoralConfusion:  how passionate
StuntmanBurt:  This is not a good advert for becoming Jewish?
YourMoralConfusion:  you’re like a byron poem of emotion luke
janice:  hahahahahahahahahaha
janice:  oh this is great!
YourMoralConfusion:  im impressed luke, that’s more exercise than i’ve done in 3 months
Emma:  lol!
StuntmanBurt:  I don’t want to be a Jew anymore!
GiaJordan:  moral must be Holly
YourMoralConfusion:  who me?
janice:  hahahahahahahahah
YourMoralConfusion:  this webcam is every kind of awesome
janice:  wow has he been doing this all day?
Emma:  Nope he just started
Emma:  Just sit through it
YourMoralConfusion:  i dont’ want ot be a jew any more either, i want a refund on my foreskin
Emma:  Might take a while
StuntmanBurt:  lol
GiaJordan:  Take Holly back Luke
janice:  hahahahahahahahah
janice:  hahahahahahahahahaha
Emma:  lol
YourMoralConfusion:  im trying to figure out who gia is
janice:  you’re comical luke
YourMoralConfusion:  it’s not gia
StuntmanBurt:  In your closet!
Emma:  Incredible Hulk
YourMoralConfusion:  i think it’s daBurg
StuntmanBurt:  Or under your bed!
GiaJordan:  You guys are perfect together Luke. 
guest74:  how old are you then
Emma:  Getting tired now
Emma:  lol
janice:  lol emma
YourMoralConfusion:  put on some wagner luke
janice:  hahahahahahahahah
guest74:  lol
YourMoralConfusion:  not that pomp and circumstance nonsense
StuntmanBurt:  Ok, Luke, I’m going now. Maybey this Moral leading thing, really is’nt your bag??. you might want to think about another job o.k!
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  we clean your toliets!!!!!!!
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  why am I hearing music?
11ManMinyan:  Word is the Rav got the idea from watching the movie "This Is Spinal Tap"
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  is music-ala-luke-ak?
YourMoralLeader:  we have distinguished visitors tonight
11ManMinyan:  And why not?  But the fear is that the Satmars will go to a 12 man minyan just to make us look bad
Emma:  Lol Luke
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  so luke  ..  are you going to be wearing one of those funny hats soon?
YourMoralLeader:  Yet in the entire history of the Jewish people I don’t know of any source that says that it is good to be poor,
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  can I buy adspace on it?
11ManMinyan:  But what can they do?  Suppose you have what you think are ten Jews in a minyan, and one of them turns out to be a so-so convert who listens to goyishe church music all day long?  Can such a man be trusted?
Emma:  lol
11ManMinyan:  Rather then expel him or shame him, better to have that 11th man present
YourMoralLeader:  is it against the Torah to listen to church music?
11ManMinyan:  It is not against the Torah, but it does raise questions
11ManMinyan:  What do you do with a Jew like that?
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  all I will say to luke .. allah akbar shallah!!!!!!!!
11ManMinyan:  It would be like a Rebbetzin singing songs from the Sound of Music
11ManMinyan:  It would raise questions. 
YourMoralLeader:  what about a sage sucking on a lollipop while listening to a torah lecture?
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  btw .. what does mean mean exactly .? .. I know the d-heads who kill people like to say that a lot when they are doing so.. its that a clue?
YourMoralLeader:  that bothers me
11ManMinyan:  The apple does not fall far from the tree.
YourMoralLeader:  abide with me
11ManMinyan:  They fear the outsider, the goy in his shabbos best
11ManMinyan:  I have to admit that the goyim have better music
YourMoralLeader:  you betcha
11ManMinyan:  We’ve got Rock of Ages, but that’s about that
11ManMinyan:  Also, the lure of the Shiksa is an ongoing threat, too. Between Xtian music, Xtian women, and the suspect convert, there is a real sense of paranoia in Lakewood
11ManMinyan:  It is like America in the fifties, when there was this fear of a communist under ever bed.  Now there is fear of a shiksa in every bed.
11ManMinyan:  We see this also in our food. 
11ManMinyan:  People now realize that most fruits and vegetables have tiny insects in there, so they have to inspect more and more
11ManMinyan:  So this drives up the cost of Kosher food even more.
YourMoralLeader:  lakewood goy/jew is still a crook
11ManMinyan:  Then there is that new Applied Science Mitzvah lab in Telse Yeshiva, a nightmare
YourMoralLeader:  11, I’ve learned to embrace my fears of the shiksa.
11ManMinyan:  They are studying static electricity and carpets.

MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  btw .. I know who one of the emp club hookers based in LA is ..  too bad Im low on that kinda coin (JUST KIDDING) .. she’s a hottie .. only well heeled clients can aford that kind of "personal attention" ..
11ManMinyan:  A waste of money
11ManMinyan:  Also, only an idiot uses those services, as they are totally infiltrated by every police department under the sun and beholden to the mafia
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  can’t believe you don’t read ERS much any more .. you would have seen that my Pellicano girl .. was all they said she was .. (and more) .. some great lines in her under oath testimony before the fed court
11ManMinyan:  Word is, the NY State police knew all about Eliot Spitzer well before the feds got to him
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  MAFIA! .. those are my people .. badda bing .. badda boom ..
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  yeah they probably dropped him off at the hooks house
YourMoralLeader:  oy ve
11ManMinyan:  A governor who was the AG  bad news
11ManMinyan:  So now NY has a swinger governor
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  the old yiddish I know is .. HA-KALM to LIFE .. man I always loved that telethon! .. way bette than Jerry Lewis!
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  The dancing , the music, those guys know how to party!
11ManMinyan:  It seems quiet in here.  Where is the frolicing of the young maden?
YourMoralLeader:  oy
11ManMinyan:  Luke, you should invite some Bais Yakov girls in here
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  Yakov Smirnoff?
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  I luv that guy ..
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  where did he go?
User guest87 left the room.
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  Luke .. Luke .. come out .. come out .. whereever you are!
11ManMinyan:  He went where all men must go, when their time comes
11ManMinyan:  Behold!
11ManMinyan:  Here is a man!
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  to be made into crackers? like Solent Green?
11ManMinyan:  Tam Tams
11ManMinyan:  Over what?
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  what the hell is that? . toast at 6:30?
User guest86 left the room.
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  come on luke .. be a real man and go get some TOP RAMEN .. the only thing REAL MEN eat!
11ManMinyan:  If this man ate pastrami, he would be wealthy
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  what is this? .. a cooking show?
11ManMinyan:  Vegetarianism is not Jewish. It does not make you a goy, any more than listening to goyishe music all day long makes you one, but it raises questions.
11ManMinyan:  Hence the need for 11ManMinyans
11ManMinyan:  Culturally, this cannot be comforting to the other nine men in any minyan Luke prays with.
11ManMinyan:  Country music,Christianity, and peanut butter
11ManMinyan:  A very stable situation. 
11ManMinyan:  You know, if one of your relatives was hell bent on having you committed, this would be just the material they’d need
YourMoralLeader:  the last supper
YourMoralLeader:  and only you are hear to witness
YourMoralLeader:  give my regards to pico/robertson
11ManMinyan:  What would the Juden have played if the Titanic had been a Jewish cruise ship?
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  YANNI!!!!
YourMoralLeader:  aleinu
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  luke wanna break a story?
YourMoralLeader:  yes
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  I will give you a tip ..
YourMoralLeader:  ok
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  the tip is a well known blogger in LA says he "shared" in pulizter prizes .. he didn’t.. lying on the resume .. not good
YourMoralLeader:  hmm
YourMoralLeader:  Kevin Roderick?
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  check it out .. I don’t know who it is yet .. but a little birdie told me so
11ManMinyan:  Eh . . . Walter Duranty actually did get a Pulitzer prize, and for covering up Stalin’s crimes.
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  like a well known blogger claiming to have won pulizters … that is one for you!
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  follow me to the promised land … oh brother Luke .. the false prophet must be sent back to where it is he came from!
guest88:  is tonights leader lession about how not to eat properly
YourMoralLeader:  y
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  yes . and luke is an A student! .. P and Jelly dinner of champions! .. elvis liked bannas on his..
guest88:  i think you know
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  Don’t let anybody otherwise .. you are the KING!  .. THE KING BABY!
11ManMinyan:  This music makes me hungry for a bag of pretzels
guest88:  time to go    great night all
guest88:  if you learn to eat better    you will be better
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  luke . this is your moral compass speaking you must go to the promised land .. you must expose the false prophet .. LEAD US TO DELIVERIENCE! (from blogger HELL!)
guest88:  this must be your mother
YourMoralLeader:  hi mom
guest88:  ha ha
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  do you need a robe? sandals? .. I know people! . i can help you dress the part!
User guest88 left the room.
11ManMinyan:  It is the warm tug of Christianity, luring Luke to a date with Destiny
11ManMinyan:  I see this man in Ireland, abandoning 15 years of work
11ManMinyan:  In an afternoon
11ManMinyan:  All the signs are here.
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  I know DESTINY .. she is HOT!  .. ya da man LUKE!
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  I think she’s LATINA TOO! (even better!)
11ManMinyan:  Jesus was more likely to have been born this time of year, so the music is, at least in that sense, appropriate
11ManMinyan:  Baby Jesus beats bearded Rabbis for warm squshy feelings
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  christmas in March .. how touching …
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  sells better too .. as we all know .. cha-ching!
11ManMinyan:  I don’t see why we cannot have Christmas twice a year.
YourMoralLeader:  beats the miami boys yeshiva choir
11ManMinyan:  Besides, the economy needs it
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  everyday is christmas at lukes havel ..  (please pass the non alch.. sparkingly cider please luke!)
User guest91 left the room.
11ManMinyan:  Luke, do you drink alcohol?
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  where have you gone havel-meister?
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  this is mission control .. capt Luke . come in do you read?
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  No … can u put on some RUN DMC?
11ManMinyan:  Play some JSBach
11ManMinyan:  Luke, coming here brings me closer to Christ
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  How bout some WHITE SNAKE? … maybe the SEX PISTOLS? ..
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  coming here brings me closer to ANYTHING but LUKE!
11ManMinyan:  Deep in his heart is the Love of Christ.
11ManMinyan:  Hence the need for 11manminyans
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  praise allah, praise buddah, praise (fill in the blank)..
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  MINTY FRESH?
11ManMinyan:  No meat, no alcohol, Christian liturgical music.
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  IM geting dizzy!
11ManMinyan:  And Shiksas Galore.
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  great special effect luke . the havel has gone hi-tech I see!
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  like that fake beard of yours? did you get that cinema secrets in Burbank.. home of OJ’s fake gotee?
MirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  I’ll buy you lunch if you shave your head and beard right now LIVE on the LUKE CAM!

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see Amazon.com). My work has been noted in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (Alexander90210.com).
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