Bring Emma To America

I deserve some happiness in my old age.

Click on the paypal button on the top left. All donaters of $100 or more will get a personal phone call from Emma while she’s live on her cam.

We’re going to bring her out here in June, please G-d.

From my live cam chat:

Emma:  I will bring plenty of poatos for you Luke
guest6:  enough potatoes to feed 8 kids +
Emma:  My parents don’t like technology
guest6:  do they like potatoes?
Emma:  Yes they like potatoes
Emma:  hmm… they would want to know every last detail
guest6:  emma big birthday plans next month?
Emma:  No plans yet
Emma:  Do you want to see me Luke? If you do I won’t be saying I met a guy off the internet haha
Emma:  lmao
Emma:  Oh I dunno.. I will think of something
Emma:  lool
Emma:  I have an idea
Emma:  My sister could come… and I could say it’s our first holiday to L.A!!!!!!!!
Emma:  lmao sarcasim
Emma:  Yeah I bring my dogs too
Emma:  I dunno I haven’t been able to see her
Emma:  She is getting an op
Emma:  It’s complicated
Emma:  Yeah Luke sure I could
YML: Tell your parents that your entire college class is going to LA for the summer
Emma:  With a free 41 year old for every student
Emma:  More like I will be your singing coach
Emma:  lol free jew
Emma:  Green tea – great for your skin
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  OPEN UP!
YourMoralLeader:  is there a problem here?
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  HEY BUSTER OPEN UP!
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  WE GOT A WARRANT
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  GET THE CHICK OUTTA HERE
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  THIS PLACE IS A HEALTH HAZARD
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  HOW MANY PEOPLE LIVE HERE?
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  WE GOTTA DELOUSE THE WHOLE PLACE
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  YOU DO NOT HAVE TO SAY ANYTHING
YourMoralLeader:  OK
YourMoralLeader:  it’s clean in here
YourMoralLeader:  I cleaned for passover
YourMoralLeader:  kinda
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  BUT IT MAY HARM YOUR DEFENCE
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  WHAT’S A NICE JEWISH BOY DOING IN A DUMP LIKE THIS?
YourMoralLeader:  I’m poor
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  THAT’S NO EXCUSE
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  MOSES WAS POOR
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  HE LED US OUT OF SLAVERY – HE DIDNT BUM AROUND SOME DUMP ALL DAY
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  I HOPE WE DON’T FIND ANYTHING WE SHOULDN’T
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  WHERE IS THE CHICK?
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  WE NEED TO QUESTION HER
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  WE GOT 235 INFRINGEMENTS OF HEALTH LAWS
YourMoralLeader:  she’s getting me some matza
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  GET HER HERE NOW
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  AND SOME DODGY OLD VIDEOS]
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  AY YAY YAY
PUBLICHEALTHDEPARTMENT:  LISTEN WE WILL BE BACK LATER
Emma:  It takes 7 weeks to process a passport
QuixoticLass:  so I really do need an au pair…I just can’t pay you, what do you say?
QuixoticLass:  a little indentured servitude?
QuixoticLass:  YML will tell you tis hard work caring for my midget army
YourMoralLeader:  Emma, just tell your parents you’ll be working the summer in LA and I’ll be your baby

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see Amazon.com). My work has been followed by the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (Alexander90210.com).
This entry was posted in Emma and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.