Tag Archives: quot

Molesting Girls

I was crashing with this girl a few years ago. I was being all honorable and just trying to get to sleep when she said to me, "Why aren’t you trying to molest me?" She was hurt that I hadn’t … Continue reading

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Absolute Civet Comes From A Dark Place

According to Rabbi Eidlitz’s book, "Is It Kosher?", Absolute Civet is secreted from a receptacle between the anus and the genitals of cats. Sounds yummy to me. I wonder how this miraculous flavoring material was discovered? According to this Oregon … Continue reading

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Without His Mistress Margaret, There Would’ve Been No Great Naipaul Novels After 1970

Was Naipaul’s great writing worth the sin of his passionate illicit relationship with Margaret of Argentina? Perhaps what I need to spark my writing is a good affair. Such a shame I am so moral, so corralled by the Holy … Continue reading

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‘Much to Your Chagrin: A Memoir of Embarrassment’

I interviewed first-time author Suzanne Guillette Monday afternoon. Buy her memoir here. Luke: "Suzanne, when you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?" Suzanne: "I had always written, but I wouldn’t say that I … Continue reading

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The Joy Of Yoga – Have You Noticed My Spiritual Growth?

I was Marc Germain’s radio show Thursday night for 30 minutes. Marc: "What’s happening with you?" Luke: "I just got back from yoga. Have you noticed a certain spiritual change in me?" Marc: "You dabble in almost everything." "Have you … Continue reading

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A Black Day for the White Man

Chaim Amalek emails: "Whither the White Man on this day, he who is neither a Hollywood celebrity nor a hipster nor a homosexual nor a Hebrew? What has he to look to on this day? This is a black day … Continue reading

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No, I Am Not Going To Text You Nude Photos Of Myself

Why not? Because on his radio show today, Dennis Prager came out against sexting (texting nude photos of yourself). I haven’t heard much of this show but I suspecting Prager will blame sexting on the breakdown of organized religion. Dennis: … Continue reading

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Yoga Makes Me Feel On Top Of The World

I just went up to the Hollywood Hills for this shot: Amalek emails: "OK, how flexible are you to begin with? How advanced is your class? What is the fit there?" I am completely inflexible. I take all manner of … Continue reading

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Luke Ford On The Yellow Peril

From my live cam: ChaimAmalek:  If I had a pal like Rod Blagojevich, I might be a US Seantor today ChaimAmalek:  You should write more about the economy ChaimAmalek:  Make predictions that if true, you can use to boost your … Continue reading

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How Come We Ain’t Got No Hot Chanies In LA?

From the website FrumSlang.com: n. "Hot Chanies are married women who supposedly adhere to the laws of modesty by dressing in wigs and skirts, but usually the skirts are tight and short and the wigs are sexy. Hot Chanies reside … Continue reading

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