Even If The Jews Won’t Have Me…

From my live cam chat:

ChaimAmalek:  Luke, if the haredim declare that you are not a Jew, would you continue to regard yourself as one?
ChaimAmalek:  Is there a point where, having been stripped of your status by orthodox bet din, you would concede that you are not Jewish according to Jewish law as you have articulated it on your blog?
ChaimAmalek:  Emma, there is a set of psychological disorders which can be grouped under the rubrik of body dismorphology perceptions, or something of that sort, where a man is born with male parts and Y chromosomes, but thinks he was meant to be a woman.
YourMoralLeader:  I am my own rebbe, I’m Jewish for life baby and nobody can take it away from me
ChaimAmalek:  Luke may have something similar in the spiritual realm – a goy who in the face of all that he is told, still thinks that he was meant to be a Jew, even though the Jews won’t have him.
ChaimAmalek:  Perhaps the All-Mightly, taking pity on His son Luke, has sent you to him as a salve.
Emma:  Perhaps
ChaimAmalek:  "Emma, I send you to Luke to be a comfort unto him as Lot’s Daughters once were to Lot, that he may be content to be the Noahide Jew he was meant to be."
Emma:  Ok Chaim I hear you…
ChaimAmalek:  Now Luke, you are the first to acknowledge that you are not your own rebbe.
YourMoralLeader:  OK, true
ChaimAmalek:  If the Rabbis whose word you respect on these matters all or mostly declare themselves that you are not a valid convert to Judaism, the brain that is processing information within your head and writing your blog would have no choice to agree with them,
YourMoralLeader:  hmm
ChaimAmalek:  Just as the trans-man who thinks he is a woman acknowledges that he does not thereby acquire the right to use the ladies bathroom at Disneyland
Emma:  lol
ChaimAmalek:  So rather than be a real Jew, Luke is a transJew.  A post-op transgoy.
ChaimAmalek:  Sure, we will let him eat whatever leftover kosher food is on the table at communal gatherings, but we won’t let him make our wine.
ChaimAmalek:  Emma, you will be his solace. 
ChaimAmalek:  Whenever his heart breaks late at night, and you hear him moaning in his sleep, it will be your task to take matters in hand and make him feel better.
Emma:  lmao
ChaimAmalek:  Man cannot long be alone
Emma:  Ok I’m pretty sure I will carry out that task well
ChaimAmalek:  Man must have his Emma
ChaimAmalek:  I’ve no doubt that you shall do your duty as a Noahidic wife
ChaimAmalek:  So when you see Luke putting on his Jewish garb in the privacy of his home/web cam, you should be as understanding as you would be if you were to marry another sort of transman, the kind that wears women’s clothes.

YourGreatBarrierReefLeader: I just checked into your room. Chaim is the most enjoyably crazy guy I have ever read.
YourGreatBarrierReefLeader: Using transgender as a way of describing you…is simply brilliant.
YourGreatBarrierReefLeader: I was just laughing so hard…….my stomach hurts
YourMoralLeader: he’s my best friend
YourGreatBarrierReefLeader: I can’t keep reading him………I don’t have the ‘stomach’ for this….

ChaimAmalek:  Sex means less to me than seeing to it that we finally have a Black Man in the White House
ChaimAmalek:  Once we have that, then maybe the shvartzes will stop complaining about everything.
ChaimAmalek:  On the other hand, what if a Jew had become president?  Would we then have stopped our whining?  I say not.
ChaimAmalek:  IZ there a whore in the house?
guest121:  zona in the hovel
guest121:  zonalicious
ChaimAmalek:  I’m one, in spirit.  If Heather Graham, the actress, were to contact me via email and offer to pay me to have sex with her, I would agree to it.
Emma:  post sexual?
ChaimAmalek:  So in principle, I am a whore
ChaimAmalek:  Well Emma, for the money, for the money
ChaimAmalek:  Not to satisfy any base lust, of which I feel none
Emma:  Never for the money Chaim
Emma:  Denial
ChaimAmalek:  You see, that’s where we differ
ChaimAmalek:  I am willing to have sex with  a Heather Graham if she pays me for the inconvenience of having to undress and take a shower.
ChaimAmalek:  What, you thought I would have sex without first cleaning myself?
ChaimAmalek:  No, I am thoughtful that way.

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see Amazon.com). My work has been covered in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and on 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (Alexander90210.com).
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