Click here to watch and chat with the gedolim as we analyze which outfits suit me best:
ChaimAmalek: Blessed be this chat room. Or is that too goyish a blessing?
ChaimAmalek: "May the All-Mighty keep our discourse Holy"
ChaimAmalek: I like this new look.
ChaimAmalek: All it needs is a giant rabbit to walk across the scene.
Emma: And actually Im not the type of girl who likes to get looked at thank you very much
QuixoticLass: who doesn’t like to be looked at?
QuixoticLass: it’s human nature to say "look at me!"
QuixoticLass: see, he’s saying it right now
watchingyoublog: i should totally go see the cherry blossoms
watchingyoublog: there are hordes of tourists who flocked here to see them and here i am
QuixoticLass: yeah don’t miss that
watchingyoublog: sitting here watching luke in la
watchingyoublog: today is peak blossom
QuixoticLass: then definitely don’t miss it
QuixoticLass: really pretty and it smells good too
watchingyoublog: i need to make an important decision
watchingyoublog: and i am hesitating about it
Emma: What decision?
QuixoticLass: Luke’s ass will be here tomorrow, but hte cherry blossoms wont
Emma: Yeah Luke likes to be looked at
Emma: What age are you Luke?
BarakObamaBabyMama: I know
BarakObamaBabyMama: but will not tell
BarakObamaBabyMama: There is much that I know but will not tell
Emma: Lol bara
BarakObamaBabyMama: My mother and I raised Luke since we found him in an alley.
Emma: Hello Diddy
BarakObamaBabyMama: I hear sounds in the backgroud….sounds that, in LA, are normally made by Mexicans at work
KhunDiddy: Emma..you still here…my G-d..donyou not have a life outside Luke?
User guest905 changed their name to ragheadali.
KhunDiddy: hi Emma..
Emma: Yes actually I’m not here long
KhunDiddy: Oh good
User DerangedConformist left the room.
KhunDiddy: it’s always nice to drop by and say hello..I can’t stay long myself
Emma: Too bad
KhunDiddy: how are things in The Old Sod?
BarakObamaBabyMama: I can stay for a long long time
ragheadali: i cant stay long either on a flyin mission soon
BarakObamaBabyMama: All without viagra
BarakObamaBabyMama: Luke, be sure to have the cameras rolling when you kasher your abode for Passover
Emma: Luke can you play some Libera……………
BarakObamaBabyMama: I want to see how it is done, West Coast style
BarakObamaBabyMama: to render kosher
BarakObamaBabyMama: this will involve a massive hunt for crumbs
KhunDiddy: I don’t have my Yiddisha dictionary out
BarakObamaBabyMama: Luke, did you ever have a bar mitzvah?
KhunDiddy: it’s that Hebrew equivalent of Christmas decorations
BarakObamaBabyMama: I ask, because in just a few months you turn 42, which is barmitzvah x 3.
BarakObamaBabyMama: Maybe you should mark your triple bar mitzvah,eh?
BarakObamaBabyMama: 13 years ago, were you a Jew?
KhunDiddy: 42….still a young man…but getting older…it goes fast…you better make a play for Emma and get on with it
BarakObamaBabyMama: Where will the reception be?
BarakObamaBabyMama: I want to help you write your bar mitzvah speech
KhunDiddy: Emma……could you live in Luke’s Hovel…two "bugs in a rug" as it were
BarakObamaBabyMama: "Today, I am a man"
Emma: No diddy
KhunDiddy: at 42 Luke shoud be picking a career soon
BarakObamaBabyMama: He’s young still. There is plenty of time
KhunDiddy: what you want to be when you grow up Luke?
BarakObamaBabyMama: 50 is the new 30
QuixoticLass: 42 is the answer
BarakObamaBabyMama: Luke, what vexes you?
KhunDiddy: 50 is the new 100
BarakObamaBabyMama: Is it a question of interpreting a shtickel of gemarrah?
BarakObamaBabyMama: You do have that look
Emma: You people ask too many questions lol
User guest906 left the room.
KhunDiddy: Emma…what you doing?
BarakObamaBabyMama: What else do you expect?
KhunDiddy: where are you?
BarakObamaBabyMama: When Irish eyes are smiling, the whole world smiles at you
BarakObamaBabyMama: I like the Irish.
BarakObamaBabyMama: When they are sober
KhunDiddy: Emma have you heard of Chaim Amalek…he’s a lonely Jew from new York..if you don’t want Luke there are other choices
Emma: Thank you
Emma: Diddy lol please stop
BarakObamaBabyMama: Emma, you should have my children
BarakObamaBabyMama: you too
KhunDiddy: When they are sober..hahahaha that’s not often
BarakObamaBabyMama: What do you get when you cross an Irish woman with a Jew?
BarakObamaBabyMama: I don’t know, but it isn’t Jewish.
KhunDiddy: stop? why…I’m trying to fix you up with an American Jew..One real…one not so real..
BarakObamaBabyMama: That’s called Torah humor
YourMoralFuhrer: lukd do you feel the impulse to commit crime is genetic in any way
BarakObamaBabyMama: Poles are good for fighting wars against Germans or Russians
BarakObamaBabyMama: My blood cholesterol levels no longer permit Mexican food….or Indian food…or Texas steak….or Cheesey pizza
YourMoralCollapse: Luke, Emma’s going to give good run for your money……..in the cam world…. 😉
BarakObamaBabyMama: Turkey turkey and chicken and other plain bland things
YourMoralOutrage: Luke, was that your lady-servant?
KhunDiddy: lololo what is that an Irish lulibye
BarakObamaBabyMama: You gotta keep the mrs out of the cam audio
YourMoralFuhrer: is that your mexican slave?
YourMoralFuhrer: that you bought in Tijuana?
BarakObamaBabyMama: Emma, what do they make of Obama in Ireland?
HankYablonski: The hovel is a clean free zone.
KhunDiddy: How’s the Van running luke?
KhunDiddy: back on the road
BarakObamaBabyMama: How do you get around without a van?
BarakObamaBabyMama: rental car?
KhunDiddy: Dominicans in the Bronx and a shvartzer in the White House
YourMoralFuhrer: i thought all this was being recorded in his van
YourMoralFuhrer: you spent tht much
YourMoralFuhrer: get a fscking rice burner
KhunDiddy: he hitch hikes
BarakObamaBabyMama: You were not wise to invest that kind of money in that kind of vehicle
BarakObamaBabyMama: What sort of mileage does that van get?
KhunDiddy: very unwise should have left it there and put the 2K down on anew one..you are not a SMART JEW
KhunDiddy: Luke is a dumb Jew and there ain’t many
YourMoralFuhrer: luke is goyischekop
BarakObamaBabyMama: The day is coming when it will cost you more in gas a day than you are earning from your web ventures.
KhunDiddy: further proof that Luke is not a REAL Jew..he got the Van fixed
BarakObamaBabyMama: Also, women these days want their men to be "green"
KhunDiddy: the Van is Green..all that MOLD
Outlaw13: DAMN ! WHAT HAPPENS !
User BarakObamaBabyMama changed their name to AMALEK.
KhunDiddy: is Emma still here..Emma don’t leave us..
Emma: emma has gone….
Emma: please leave a message
AMALEK: bye bye emma…..
KhunDiddy: Emma Emma ..I’m going to slash my writs arrrrggghhh!
User KhunDiddy left the room.
AMALEK: I would never name a girl Natalie Emma, because then her name would be N. Emma
AMALEK: badda bing!
AMALEK: Luke, someone told me you are applying to law school
AMALEK: I hear a stream of water!
YourMoralFuhrer: it’s awesome that the camera follows him into the bathroom
YourMoralFuhrer: i can hear him pissing
AMALEK: Sounds like it could be in the country somewhere
AMALEK: and now a waterfall
AMALEK: Very rustic
AMALEK: Next up, exercise!
AMALEK: Then prayer!
AMALEK: Thus does he aggrandize the name of G-d.
martha: get some weights lol
AlJolson: Seems like he is mixing it up with an invisible pole…..this is a pole dance
martha: looks like you controlling trafffic lol
Emma: Thats the best excersise Ive ever seen lol!!
martha: this way please lol
AlJolson: This sort of imagery will not chasten the enemies of Zion
martha: i think he’ll be good at the birdie song lol
martha: or superman
guest919: comming in for landing….
martha: sit down
martha: get a drink
martha: wow all those books
AlJolson: Show us a box of Matzos
AlJolson: Drinking Yellow again
martha: juice time lol
guest919: keep goin mate
martha: is it??
AlJolson: Luke’s recycled home brew
martha: oh no
martha: this song
Emma: Better song…..
martha: heart of glass
martha: noe oldie
AlJolson: Next stop: 1977.
martha: like this
AlJolson: This sounds gay
martha: it is lol
AlJolson: This is the sort of music that gays used to bugger themselves with
martha: you should know
AlJolson: Many a case of HIV was contracted with Blondie in the background
Emma: lol wtf Luke
AlJolson: oh zap
guest919: I AM HE_MAN
martha: yeah wotever lol
martha: oh listen to those groans lol
User guest921 left the room.
AlJolson: We are the enablers of this man’s life
martha: put some new music on#
AlJolson: But for us, he would either kill himself or make something of himself
User guest925 left the room.
martha: six pack
AlJolson: Play "Afternoon Delight"
guest924: excuse me for asking, but what the f**k’s going on here like?
User guest923 left the room.
martha: do you ever tidy up it looks like a bomb site behind you
guest919: ask luke
Emma: lol 92
martha: this is the moral leader performing lol
AlJolson: This is a Jew, exercising
martha: it’s fun
AlJolson: Bottles of his own urine in each hand
guest924: I daren’t
User guest922 left the room.
martha: sit down now u scaring us lol
martha: steady on
AlJolson: Somehow, I don’t think Arnold Swartzennegar got his start this way
guest919: omg he dyin
guest924: nice moves
martha: yes lol
martha: i think you look hot
guest924: tell me how the f**k this can benefit anyone ffs?
martha: take your shirt off lol
guest919: ahhhh workin out is that what ya call it
martha: now wheres he gone ??
guest924: he’s off his tits
guest919: 924 it has to me
martha: hi Emma#
Emma: hello lol
martha: how u doin?
guest919: im doin it rite now as i type
Emma: Grand ta
martha: it’s good harmless fun winding him up of course lol
guest924: it’s made me wanna go for a s**t
AlJolson: Do any of the women here find themselves oddly attracted to the package before them? Be honest now
martha: yes cool
guest924: and that’s just the music ffs
martha: def not
guest926: lol 924
AlJolson: I say you are, for why else would you be here?
martha: wots he bloody doin now?
AlJolson: You want to mother him
martha: nope lol
AlJolson: I don’t like this voice
AlJolson: Who is this?
martha: could destroy his music collection though
AlJolson: This is seventies music.
guest924: you got any harpo marx mate?
guest931: LUKE love see you soon xxxxxxx
guest931: night night
guest919: luke ur scaring me
AlJolson: NEWS FLASH: Michael Jackson is the Bee’s Knees
guest931: send me a kiss please!!!
guest919: oh he waves like the queen
guest931: THANK YOUXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
guest919: luke wave
guest931: NO HE DOESNT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
martha: wot have i missed
guest919: ahhh luke waved….and no much else
guest919: ahhh i think he farted….had a strange look on his face
guest924: you’re zooming in and out like an autistic savant rocks back and forth luke
guest924: should I make associations here?
guest931: LUKE!!!!!! TAKE NO NOTICE OF THE FU>> ING IDIOTS!!
Emma: lol he is loving this
guest919: 931…….are u his mum
guest931: JUST LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
guest924: too right 931, he should take more notice of you…….say, you made a paypal donation to him yet?
guest924: you sure 931?
guest919: luke ur mas here
guest919: hi Mrs Ford
guest924: no s**t 919
guest924: you wanna nuture him 931?
guest924: sorry, was going for ‘torture’ and I typoed
guest919: awwww….put him on the tit
User Emma left the room.
guest924: so luke, how many asbestos chips do you eat a day?
AlJolson: It’s his wife
guest919: yeah…like …like …yeah
guest924: tell us how you made the transgression from hollywood pornographic interveiwer to Judaism luke
AlJolson: He is so dismissive of her
guest931: WHY DONT YOU TALK WITH EACH OTHER AND NOT TAKE P*SS OUT
AlJolson: Just because she is Mexican
Emma: LOL luke
guest931: OF LUKE????
guest919: awww see 931 he is taken
guest924: natural career progression huh?
AlJolson: I’m NOT taken
AlJolson: I’m fully available and I’m allman
AlJolson: I don’t normally listen to this sort of music
guest924: is that like Islam al?
guest919: luke who were u chattin to
Emma: Its raining men lmao
guest924: whoever it is, they got his back to him 919
guest919: cool AL send me a pic
guest924: and he to us in turn
guest924: s**t rolls down hill you know
AlJolson: See, I’m a real man
guest919: OMG hes GAY
guest924: he does look kinda happy, I grant you that
guest931: NIGHT NIGHT LUKE XXXXXXXXX
AlJolson: Luke is on some special pills these days.
guest919: 931 u said that 20 mins ago
guest919: just go
guest924: you think al?
AlJolson: I know so
guest924: no s**t
guest924: me too
Emma: Air guitar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AlJolson: And they are not the kind you can buy in a store
guest931: GIVE ME A KISS GOOD NIGHT PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
guest919: omg help me im dancin to this song ….i cant help it
guest931: OR SOMETHING ELSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AlJolson: Whenever Luke and I go on the down – low, this is the song we dance to
guest919: leave him alone 931
guest924: this is a gay anthem for sure
AlJolson: Can this music get any gayer? I say no
guest919: i bet 931 is amanda
Emma: lol 931
AlJolson: 931 is a GUY
AlJolson: If we had been listening to more cowboy music back then, the Mexicans never would have dared invade
guest919: amanda is a stalker on camstreams
guest931: SOMETHING ELSE PLEASE AS I ASKED !!!!!!!!!!!!! XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Emma: lol 931 are you feeling ok hunny?
guest919: luke just do what 931 wants the they will piss off
AlJolson: I want to hear the Song of the Volga Boatmen
AlJolson: This music is why Western Man needs Viagra to do what comes naturally to the Black Man
guest924: so tell me something luke, how come your pic om the main page is of you twenty years ago?
guest931: GO ON PLEASE!!!!!!!!!
DoooDaaa: whats the matter with ur cam…keeps zooming in and out
AlJolson: I can explain that
Emma: lol doodaa
AlJolson: The cam is attached to his private parts and responds in synch with them
theactualgiajordan: luke, did u get candy for purim?
LukesBiggestFan: omg im dancin again….help me
guest924: I feel like the shoe shine guy off Police Squad
AntipodeanLuvver: Howard Jones does this to me every time
Fischel: EVERYONE: Watch this while you can: http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=7d9_1206624103
Fischel: Luke, check out that documentary. It is pretty amazing stuff.
Fischel: It’s by a Dutch group warning against the Islamization of Europe.
Fischel: It has it all – quotes from the Koran, beheadings, etc.
Fischel: This goes to your predicament in life. While you blog, they breed; and while you preach, well nothing serious, they work towards your doom.
YourMorelLeader: Rockin’ w/Luke
YourMorelLeader: nice sandals
DiscoDuck: Ground control to Major Tom
YourImperfectImperfection: Luke put on some more cheery music!
YourMorelLeader: 3-d house of luke
YourMorelLeader: oh ja
DiscoDuck: hearing yml say that with his accent a litlte drunk is funny
guest666: Junior High music
DiscoDuck: Ground control to Major Tom
guest666: This is so depressing
YourMorelLeader: does he have a close-n-play phonograph or something?
DiscoDuck: he has a walkman
YourMorelLeader: good lord
guest666: Martian music
DiscoDuck: wtf is wrong with him today
guest666: This music inspires the Saracen to cut our throats
YourMorelLeader: chemical imbalance
YourMorelLeader: let’s send Luke to Baghdad
DiscoDuck: he looks very testy
YourMorelLeader: we need his leadership
DiscoDuck: we should go out for a drink after mincha
YourMorelLeader: then frum sex
DiscoDuck: he’s not married that I know of
YourMorelLeader: not since TMFR
DiscoDuck: take a bow
YourMorelLeader: hokey schomels
YourMorelLeader: major luke
DiscoDuck: taylor raine that shiksa?
YourMorelLeader: did you comsumate the marraige?
YourMorelLeader: sorry about the spelling
QuietStorm: Hello Luke
DiscoDuck: I know I have been swamped at work
YourMorelLeader: good thing that you still have your penis
guest666: Shiksas are for practice
QuietStorm: How are you today Luke?
DiscoDuck: blie neder I’ll send the review soon
YourMorelLeader: this is your next wife Luke
YourMorelLeader: what kind of cam is that?
YourMorelLeader: it’s like porn cam qualit
guest666: contextless laughter
YourMorelLeader: hot cha
YourMorelLeader: laughing like Rasputin
Luke Ford the mad monk
DiscoDuck: It’s going to be of an Orthodox Shul in the SFV
YourMorelLeader: or whatever they call a Jewish monk
QuietStorm: Luke, why is your cam still moving in and out?
guest666: Because it goes in and out and in and out
YourMorelLeader: he’s zooming
DiscoDuck: why were you at sharey Tzedek? visiting for a simcha?
DiscoDuck: have you been back?
YourMorelLeader: sweet eva 2008
DiscoDuck: wash your hands
YourMorelLeader: is this where he slaughters a gentile baby?
User QuietStorm left the room.
YourMorelLeader: you are scaring me
YourMorelLeader: let’s eat
DiscoDuck: that is an evil drug induced laugh
User guest947 left the room.
DiscoDuck: rewash without a bracha
YourMorelLeader: I wish that I was recording this
DiscoDuck: rewash since you talked
User guest666 left the room.
YourMorelLeader: time to leave the hovel
DiscoDuck: morel leader is a posek (chas v’shalom) and that is how he rules
DiscoDuck: yml there is a dispute regarding the rewashing
DiscoDuck: the MB mentions that if the individual was careful with his hands ie:didn’t contaminate them he doesn’t need to rewash