Q&A With Author Deborah Schoeneman About Her New York Times Profile Of The ‘Fempire’

I email Deborah: I will publish this on my blog without any editing. It will go up as you return it (with a link to your piece, to your website, to your novel, and a note that this was done via email).

Here are her answers to all my questions:

* Can you give me any background on your NYT piece on the four screenwriters? Any story has so many buzzing variables, how did you come to choose the angle you did?

When I moved to LA last year, I started reading a ton of scripts. I was really struck by Liz’s scripts for "Sluts" and "Friends With Benefits." I think she’s a fantastic writer. I also heard about the Fempire from screenwriter friends–particularly from one guy who was jealous. I thought, well, here’s a social group and some tension and that’s always a good place to start with a styles story idea. I reached out to a publicist who was working with Diablo and Lorene, back when "Nick and Norah’s" was coming out (I wanted that to be the hook) and he said the styles section was not "serious enough" and they would only do it for the arts section. That wasn’t going to work, because I only write for styles. I ended up meeting the Fempire one day in a social setting and I just asked them directly to do the story. They were thrilled. The publicist had never even asked them to be in styles. When I met them, it was clear that Dana was the den mother/organizer, so I zoomed in on her via Facebook and that’s how it got off the ground.

* Anything that made this story distinctive for you from all your other work?

I really admire all of these women. I didn’t want to write a puff piece, but I think they work hard, produce great work and are really nice, cool and supportive. I’ve only written a few stories where I feel like everyone wins and I think this was one of them and that makes me feel good.

* One of my biggest flaws as a writer is description. I’m terrible at describing people. How do you decide when to include the beauty of a subject’s looks and how do you decide how to deal with it? Does describing male vs. female beauty have different minefields or do you approach that task the same?

My editors were more interested in my writing physical descriptions after they saw the pictures and understood that these women are really hot, not just writer hot, which is less hot than regular hot. I also find it helpful to compare subjects to celebs in some way in a description. Particularly if you’re writing something not really flattering about someone and you say they have Angelina Jolie lips or a Kate Hudson smile, that’s what they tend to remember most.

* You’ve done many different types of paid writing. Which are your favorite forms and least favorite forms?

I like to do stories where I feel like everyone wins. I win by getting a good byline and a paycheck and the subjects win by getting attention for something worthy. I hate celeb gossip reporting. It’s like eating candy—fun for a moment and then ultimately makes you sick. That’s why I stopped writing a gossip column for New York magazine. I just don’t want to be that messenger.

* I always find it amusing when women wear short skirts in public and then spend all their time trying to pull them lower. Has this ever happened to you? Can you provide us with any insight into the thinking that goes on with this habit?

I think Diablo just didn’t know she would be sitting on a high director’s chair. It’s usually an accident.

* How do you feel about these four screenwriters? How much do you let your feelings about a subject enter into your writing?

I really don’t have any need in my life and career right now to write something about someone I dislike. I just wrote a cover story for C magazine about Isla Fisher, which was also really fun because she was fun. Before I met Diablo, I expected her to be someone I wouldn’t like. I believed some of the hype of her haters from the Internet. Well, it turns out she’s exceptionally talented and warm. It was a good lesson.

* You’ve written mean things about people and glowing things about people. How does the type of writing you do affect your happiness level?

I am done writing mean things about people. It causes me great stress and unhappiness and there’s no real upside for me. Also, a good piece of journalism is not mean or glowing—it’s just honest.

* Many journalists describe the essence of their craft as "charm and betray." How do you feel about that? Do you do this?

I started at 21 at the New York Observer and I definitely charmed and betrayed a lot of people back then for the byline. Now I’m 31 and I’m over that game. It’s a sign of immaturity to play it. I believe the subject should have a very clear sense of what is going in the story before it appears in print. Have the fight in the fact checking stage. Don’t surprise people. It always comes back to haunt you.

* How did your screenwriters react to your piece?

Liz and Dana sent me nice emails. I haven’t heard from Diablo or Lorene yet, but I think I will.

* What have been the most surprising reactions you’ve received to it?

I’ve gotten a lot of kind feedback from friends. This was the first time I posted a story on Facebook.

* Is there anything terrifying about these four screenwriters? If so, what is it?

No. Their success is good for women writers everywhere. I hope women writers will read the story and feel inspired and supported and not jealous and catty. I went through the jealous and catty phase about women writers who were more successful than I. It was nothing but damaging and a waste of energy. I’d rather be on the team, even if I’m just warming the bench, than trying to beat it.

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Rabbi Moshe Tendler Ascends The Temple Mount

From WorldNetDaily.com:

A prominent U.S. rabbi recently ascended the Temple Mount – Judaism’s most revered site – stirring a quiet debate among some within the Jewish religious community about whether Jews should be permitted to enter the mount.

Some rabbis forbid Jewish entry, while others permit it. Those who oppose ascending the mount may indirectly contribute to the current Islamic consolidation of the site, argued Rabbi Moshe Dovid Tendler, a Jewish law and ethics professor and top rabbinic scholar.

"The reality is that slowly the area has become without Jews," Tendler told WND. "The claim of the Arabs that it belongs to them is being affirmed by our (Jewish) absence."

A video of Tendler visiting the Temple Mount in January was released this past week on YouTube by the Temple Institute, a nonprofit organization promoting awareness of the mount. The video can be seen below:

The video sparked controversy within the ultra-Orthodox Jewish community, where some rabbis forbid Jews to go up to the mount until the Third Temple is built, even though there are records of Jews, including some of the most prominent Jewish law scholars, visiting the Temple ruins from the Byzentine period until recently.

On Vosizneias, a popular ultra-Orthodox blog, user opinions

regarding Tendler’s visit ran the gamut from praise for the rabbi to calling for him to be excommunicated.

REPORT:

NEW YORK (JTA) — A New York City rabbi condemned the call to assassinate Palestinian leaders issued at his synagogue.

Elie Abadie of Congregation Edmond J. Safra in Manhattan said the call last week by the leader of an Israeli pro-settler organization to kill Palestinian Authority President Mahmoud Abbas and other "terrorist leaders" is "odious and repugnant."

He added the sponsoring organization, Americans for a Safe Israel, is no longer welcome to host events at his synagogue.

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Women Wanting To Be Treated With Respect

I hear a lot of complaints by women that they are only looked at as sexual objects. They wanted to be seen with respect.

Well, anyone who commands respect gets respect.

A woman with a PhD in math gets respect. A woman with no accomplishment gets no respect.

If a woman is angry that she is not getting treated with respect needs to start acting in ways that command respect.

Women want to get respect without earning it.

Danielle Berrin wrote in the Oct. 22, 2008 Jewish Journal about meeting director Brett Ratner: "He doesn’t seem to care that I’m a journalist on assignment or that when he offered to give me a tour of his Benedict Canyon manse, I was thrilled to explore the architecture: a Tudor-style estate designed by Hoover Dam architect Gordon Kaufman."

I guarantee that Danielle got treated with greater respect after she published this devastating profile.

Danielle’s gorgeous, but as she keeps accumulating journalistic scalps, even the most disreputable men will have to take her seriously. If she keeps up the good work, she’ll leave them no choice.

Here’s a summary of one of Dennis Prager’s recent shows: "Dennis opens up the lines for questions on the general subject of male female differences. Issues raised include: why do men objectify women; is the Playboy culture to blame for why so many men aren’t willing to commit to a woman; how does a woman handle a man who makes her feel uncomfortable; should husbands and wives romance their spouses after marriage."

On this show, Dennis got a heartbreaking call from someone identifying himself as Ken in New York: "Dennis, the last two women’s phone calls are a perfect dovetail for my question to you. Please help me formulate my question. I’m sitting here listening and I’m actually crying because I realized I called in just to ask a basic question about women, I realized how pervasive the titillation thing, the softcore porn, has played an effect in my life to the destruction of my marriage and to the dissolution of my family. I grew up in the Playboy era where it was natural to have Playboy books when you went to the barber. When I went to get my first haircut, it was all Playboy books. Then Penthouse came out. Even my grandparents had the magazine. Porn came in. I was programmed as a male to only look at women as sex objects. I’ve never been able to bridge that gap. It was in my marriage that I had to deal with a real live three-dimensional woman. I wasn’t up to the task. Aside from the fact that I’m bipolar and that I suffer from depression and the circumstances of my life growing up, my wife just divorced me after 20 years. That was three years ago. I haven’t had sex in years. And so I’m walking around angry and sullen and depressed repelling women. My original question to your screener was, what do women want? Do they want me to send the signal that I find them desirable? Or do I do the thing that I’ve always done and just be a perfect gentleman? And then I have no sex because I don’t send out the signal? I don’t want to be this angry guy. All during the last ten years of my marriage which were absolutely miserable, I just dreamed of pornographic fantasies being with numerous women and being a player and single. And that was going to bring my happiness.

"Once the marriage was over, I realized, wow, that is not what I want. Now that I have the opportunity to go on the internet and swing and do all this stuff, it’s the last thing I want. My fantasy now is to meet a woman who I can actually reveal every part of me to without fear of being rejected or judged."

The man chokes up.

Dennis: "What do you do for a living?"

Ken: "I have my own business. I’m a children’s educator. I’m my own employee."

Dennis: "Are you making a living?"

Ken: "Yeah."

"I’m renting a basement apartment somewhere. I’m not a player. I don’t have money."

After the break, Dennis said there are any number of men who have seen such magazines as Penthouse and have had beautiful marriages and many men who have never seen the magazines have had horrible marriages. "I don’t like it when people blame outside things."

"At your age, in your mid-forties, living in a basement apartment is going to be a challenge in attracting women. She’s going to want to see a more stable life, a life that has shown more that has been accomplished. There are a lot of things you have to work through."

Ken calls back to say he feels humiliated.

Dennis: "I never [humiliate]."

Butch up, Ken!

Austin in Anchorage says: "Nowadays it appears that women, I’ve had it happen to me personally, that women, once they get their husband, no longer maintain the effort to stay thin and beautiful. Men are automatically supposed to love them no matter what. Is that wrong for men to want their wives to stay beautiful?"

Dennis: "I can’t think of anything more wrong than trying to look your best to catch a man, catch a man, and then not trying to look your best again."

"People should date while they are married just as they dated before marriage. They should never take the other for granted, not for one second."

"If what you describe is accurate, you have to say, ‘You have cheated me. You took me for granted. You deceived me. You advertised yourself as X and then when I bought the product, I got Y."

"Nobody should think that no matter how they act, they have tenure in marriage."

Dennis then got a call from a woman taking him to task.

DP: "If the man is decent, he knows whether she is trying to look her best."

"You should act like you have to earn the love of your spouse every day of your marriage. Taking your spouse’s love for granted is a prescription for disaster."

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Great Questions For A First Date

Gambler writes:

Great questions fall into a number of categories. They all share a few traits:

  • They are original.
  • They bring out an old memory.
  • They bring out a positive emotion.
  • They challenge her.

Let’s get onto the questions:

1. Did you have an Imaginary friend when you were young?

2. Do you remember your first day at school?

This is a question that brings out strong emotions because it is something that they probably haven’t talked about for a long time, but that has strong emotions attached to it.

3. If you could wake up tomorrow anywhere in the world, where would it be?

This is another good question and replaces boring questions on this subject such as “do you like travel?” and “did you go on holiday this year”. Get her to describe the place vividly until she feels like she is there!

4. Are your friends mostly men or women?

This tells you something about their character and also gets them talking about people they care about and their friends.

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Child Brides On Pico Blvd

Walk Pico Blvd near Robertson Blvd on Shabbat and you’ll see some Orthodox women who look about 16 pushing baby carriages.

These are Orthodox girls around 18 years of age who’ve married young and started having kids.

In my experience, these women (and couples) tend to be formidably competent and mature beyond their years.

Many will say they are too immature to raise kids, but Dennis Prager argues that getting married and having kids in your late teens is probably the fastest way to grow up.

Dennis says it is far better to have kids raised by married teens than by single mothers.

The latest figures show that 40% of new births are to unmarried mothers. Prager said that what was as important as the statistic was the AP refusing to list this as something bad.

REPORT:

ATLANTA (AP) – More babies were born in the United States in 2007 than any year in the nation’s history, topping the peak during the baby boom 50 years earlier, federal researchers reported Wednesday.

There is both good and bad news from the more than 4.3 million births:

_The U.S. population is more than replacing itself, a healthy trend.

_However, the teen birth rate was up for the second year in a row.

The birth rate rose slightly for women of all ages, and births to unwed mothers reached an all-time high of about 40 percent, continuing a trend begun years ago. More than three-quarters of these women were 20 or older.

For a variety of reasons, it’s become more acceptable for women to have babies without a husband, said Duke University’s S. Philip Morgan, a leading fertility researcher.

Even happy couples may be living together without getting married, experts say. And more women—especially those in their 30s and 40s—are choosing to have children despite their single status.

The new numbers indicate the nation is experiencing a baby boomlet with fertility rates higher in every racial group. On average, a U.S. woman has 2.1 babies in her lifetime. The highest fertility rates were among Hispanics.

 

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Barack Obama Seems Serious

He presents himself as a man with gravitas. But when he talks, he reveals himself as shallow. He doesn’t take ideas seriously.

Dennis Prager says the Wall Street bonuses, AIG bonuses, are despicable but you can’t pass a law to tax a specific group.

And then there’s no response from the President. That’s scarier than the act itself.

Jay Leno said it was scary that you could tax a group of people just because you are angry at him.

President Obama said he bowled a 129… "It was like Special Olympics."

He’s had to apologize for saying that. Why is that line offensive?

Are we supposed to hide that Special Olympics are for people with disabilities? He’s not mocking those with disabilities. He’s mocking himself.

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Nauseating Success

PS: AFTER I WROTE THIS BLOG POST, I INTERVIEWED THE AUTHOR VIA EMAIL.

This gushing profile of four female screenwriters in Hollywood made me want to retch.

There’s not one skeptical let alone critical sentiment in it.

I love this description: "Waiting to answer, cross-legged in another, was Diablo Cody, struggling to keep her short blue dress from riding up."

Why do women wear short dresses and then spend their time trying to keep them from riding up? It’s the most pathetic sight. If you don’t want to show it all, then don’t wear short dresses.

I find this description nauseating: "The two women, both 30, both screenwriters at the top of their game, both gorgeous…"

The article is headlined "Hollywood’s New Power Posse" but none of the content makes the writers seem particularly powerful. They have power over who exactly?

This also made me ill: "To see them gathered amid the dinosaur topiary around Ms. Fox’s swimming pool with their dogs (they all have dogs) is to see four distinct styles of glamour that bear little resemblance to traditional images of behind-the-scenes talent."

Four distinct styles of glamor? Just to see them around the swimming pool or at a restaurant? Few people look glamorous without considerable effort (hair, make-up, etc). Do they really look glamorous when they’re not putting effort into it?

"But these women also work hard…" Doesn’t everyone?

Dana Fox says: “It’s rare to find women who have that balance between work and life, who are really psyched for another woman’s success."

Is it that rare? Is it any more common among men? How balanced are their lives considering that it seems from this article that none of them are married and none of them have kids?

This article is just an invitation to hate these women. How would you like an article in the New York Times describing you as having it all?

"Screenwriters usually don’t have stylists or publicists, yet the women said they feel pressure to look photogenic in a way that is not demanded of male screenwriters."

Well, duh, women generally are the attracting species. Their looks matter much more than the looks of men, who are principally valued for their strength.

Here’s how the article dismisses all criticsm of the women: "But not everyone loves these four women, and plenty are happy to say so (many of them anonymously). So among them there is also a battle-scarred camaraderie. “Whenever you have a project out in wide release, there are haters,” Ms. Cody said. “Blogs, imdb, Rotten Tomatoes, reviews. It’s a lot to deal with. When most people get Googled, they get maybe a Facebook page. When we get Googled, there’s criticism, bad reviews, commentary on the way we look. You need people who have been through it.”"

YogaEnthusiast:  I think you’re just jealous of those women friends
YogaEnthusiast:  and you’d rather be rich and famous yourself
YogaEnthusiast:  but there’s no way that’s ever going to happen
YogaEnthusiast:  they’re also really cute together and 30 years old
YogaEnthusiast:  and you’re over 40 – you wasted your time while they are pretty successful

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‘The Dying Animal’

Here’s my video review of the movie ‘Elegy":

CTBatBoy comments: What struck me as laughable was the moment where David puts his hand on Consuela’s wrist and strokes it while they are sitting at the piano. His gnarled, wrinkled hand on her smooth young skin was horrifying and the contrast of that one moment– his decaying body furtively stroking her taut body -summed up the whole pathos of the film.

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The Non-Jews and the Israeli Jews

A kashurt inspector I know worked at a food establishment owned by non-Jews. They were completely respectful of the laws of kashrut.

He worked at a food establishment run by Orthodox Israelis who were constantly trying to do end-runs around the rules.

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A Miniskirt And A Sheitl

I was in the middle of the Kedusha — one of the high points of the Shabbos morning prayer service — when, out of the corner of my eye, I saw young female flesh.

I looked out the door and there was a couple walking down the street. She had gorgeous blonde hair, but it was a sheitl (wig). She was pushing a baby carriage. Her husband wore a yarmulke.

All well and good, but what shocked me was that her skirt stopped a foot above the knee.

I love living in Pico-Robertson. This is truly the hot beating heart of Modern Orthodoxy.

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