The other day I was in the house of God worshiping the Almighty according to the strictest strictures of his Immutable Moral Law — written and oral — when I stumbled over the unlikeliest of creatures — a friend.
He started saying the weirdest things to me. Very disturbing. I almost called the security guard to escort him out but then I’d be utterly bereft.
My friend said that God loves us unconditionally.
Then why do the mitzvot (divine commandments)?
To show God that we love Him.
What if the mitzvot are too much bother and I’d rather sit at the beach on Shabbos mornings in a speedo and read Playboy?
Will God still love me?
Yes.
Just as much?
Yes.
What if I murder someone?
God will still love me.
Just as much?
Yes. I’m a creature of God. We are all creatures of God.
Does God love Hitler and Mother Theresa equally (Dennis Prager’s question)?
That stumped him. Reluctantly my friend said yes. Hitler is also made in the image of God.
So God’s just a big love machine, pumping out love irrespective of our behavior (Dennis Prager’s question)?
Yes.
So God’s love is amoral?
He’ll have to think about that.
I’ve sent in an email to the RCC asking to be appointed the Grand Inquisitor of Pico/Robertson with the right to burst into any home and examine it and its occupants for any signs of latitudarianism, which we have far too much of in this modern neighborhood. Think of me as a Torquemada for the 21st Century.
