palestine4ever: oh my
palestine4ever: this is a side of luke i never intended to see
palestine4ever: LUKE
palestine4ever: WAKE UP
palestine4ever: THE HEAT IS WORKIN
palestine4ever: THE OVEN’S WORKIN
palestine4ever: WHY AIN’T YOU WORKIN
YourMoralLeader: hi
palestine4ever: wow that was creepy
YourMoralLeader: what?
palestine4ever: I didn’t know my words had such power
YourMoralLeader: you created me with your words
YourMoralLeader: You are like G-d
palestine4ever: and so will I destroy you, Jedi
YourMoralLeader: what’s the scoop?
palestine4ever: i think we should do morning ablutions like in the old days
palestine4ever: they did it with cold water and dammit there were less gays then
YourMoralLeader: good idea
CarlNKarcher: How do you do that?
palestine4ever: dunk yourself in freezing cold water for the most part
palestine4ever: there’s some spiritual mumbo jumbo that goes with it too
palestine4ever: it beats smacking yourself with a belt studded with nails as a masturbation cure, at least
palestine4ever: I enjoyed the interview with the Soviet jewess
palestine4ever: maybe homeopathy is the key to your AdSense fortune, Luke
palestine4ever: last night I found myself with insomnia and wondered what Luke Ford could recommend in a textlink to help me
palestine4ever: it’s strange, though
palestine4ever: about the Soviet jewessm.
palestine4ever: after you interview these people, I NEVER want to read their books
palestine4ever: I don’t even feel any curiosity
palestine4ever: and I’m a voracious reader
palestine4ever: this might come off as wrong
palestine4ever: but I think you out the phonies
palestine4ever: I don’t think even you’d agree with that
palestine4ever: but a lot of these folks seem to write because dental school was too hard
palestine4ever: I’m pretty sure Dostoyevsky would kill over a novel
palestine4ever: if the novel was banned tomorrow, I have the feeling that a lot of these folks would move on to flower arranging
YourMoralLeader: Emma’s gonna work at a stud farm this summer, I can’t yet afford to fly her out
palestine4ever: whoa
YourMoralLeader: She’ll be breeding
palestine4ever: Okay, I understand now
palestine4ever: But "Emma" + "stud farm" = Rob Spallone’s house?
YourMoralLeader: I have a high-powered sales guy promoting my SEO skills, we should get some serious contracts soon
palestine4ever: it dawned on me reading your advice to that weird british guy
palestine4ever: there’s probably more money in telling other people what to do than doing it yourself
palestine4ever: teachyourselfseoyouignorantba***rds.com
IknowstuntmanBurt: Burt sent me Luke! he said you would be my Moral Leader?
YourMoralLeader: Here I am!
palestine4ever: I must recommend a completely fraudulent but press-inducing ebay auction for the undertaker suit
IknowstuntmanBurt: Burt said you where ok?
palestine4ever: like did you see the Rachel Marsden thing a few weeks back, Luke?
palestine4ever: she banged Jimbo Wales, the Supreme Ayatollah of Wikipedia
palestine4ever: then leaked all of their IM conversations
palestine4ever: and put his clothes he left at her apartment up for auction
palestine4ever: sure it made her look like a bats**t crazy loon
IknowstuntmanBurt: What you eating Luke?
palestine4ever: but the undertaker suit has history, dammit!
palestine4ever: I am going to record this chat
palestine4ever: and put "Honey Bunches of Oats" as my computer alert sound
palestine4ever: http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/todays_neo_nazis_have_no
YourMoralLeader: truth there mate
palestine4ever: See, that’s what I never get about "white nationalists"
palestine4ever: It’s pretty clear to me that the Jews and Chinks are smarter
palestine4ever: http://edition.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/europe/04/29/austria.cellar.profile/
YourMoralLeader: oy
palestine4ever: This is a man who has taken the declining demographics of the white race as a personal challenge
ChaimAmalek: So what aren’t you to write about now?
QuixoticLass: life the universe and everything
QuixoticLass: did you get my email?
ChaimAmalek: No
ChaimAmalek: You never write to AMALEK
ChaimAmalek: I would like you to expose the Jeremiah Wrights of the Jewish world. Are there any?
ChaimAmalek: I want to hear about Rabbis preaching fire and brimstone against America
ChaimAmalek: Rabbis with novel ideas about 911 and AIDS, and sympathy for the downtrodden
CarlNKarcher: Chaim, is there any Rabbi you have love for?
ChaimAmalek: Hmmmmmm
CarlNKarcher: Orthodox, that is.
ChaimAmalek: Rabbi Gadol is cool
CarlNKarcher: Are they all cast in the same mold?
ChaimAmalek: If Luke were an orthodox rabbi, I might daven in his shul
CarlNKarcher: CA, what Yeshivahs did you attend?
ElShaddai: haha do you always move your lips when you read?
QuixoticLass: do you always look like a jerk when you type?
QuixoticLass: "may I speak to the director of your religious school?"
ElShaddai: to whom do you type, lass? to me?
QuixoticLass: "we don’t have a religious school"
QuixoticLass: "I’m sorry"
QuixoticLass: "that’s ok, we’re fine with it"
QuixoticLass: yes shaddai, you were making fun of YML and that is not nice
ElShaddai: He’s my Moral Leader as well as yours
ElShaddai: and I hold my moral leaders to high standards
ElShaddai: including being able to read torah without moving their lips
QuixoticLass: religious jews move their lips when praying/studying torah
willied: luke, do you own any non-blue polos?
QuixoticLass: it is tradition
ElShaddai: yes but he wasn’t actually praying or studying torah- he was reading a blogservice called fleshbot
QuixoticLass: do you have a cam that can see his screen?
ElShaddai: i can see his screen reflected in the glass behind him, cant you?
QuixoticLass: there is no glass behind him
willied: terri reador hates luke
YourMoralLeader: Greetings
YourMoralLeader: why hate on terri?
ElShaddai: ahhh LAss. You are a glass half empty lass, to be sure
YourMoralSchvartze: luke doesn’t Torah forbit talking to shiksas
Sugartits: I kissed you on the cheek at AEE Vegas once several years ago
willied: we’ll read your essay ‘dildos of shame’ on the webcam
YourMoralLeader: whoa
YourMoralLeader: are you female?
Sugartits: yes
YourMoralLeader: awesome
YourMoralLeader: how about a pic for old time’s sake?
ElShaddai: again with the jug of urine
Sugartits: You’d remember if a dude had kissed your face, right?
YourMoralLeader: not really
Sugartits: haha
YourMoralLeader: been so many
Sugartits: Ew. lol
ElShaddai: of course its a female- with a name like sugartits.
Sugartits: I admire your austere lifestyle of self-denial.
YourMoralSchvartze: luke lives more like a trappist monk
YourMoralLeader: Thank you
YourMoralLeader: I try to stay firm.
Sugartits: Is that what is in the jug?
Sugartits: I thought it was urine.
YourMoralLeader: green tea my dear, wan a sip?
willied: i like the blue label
Sugartits: I’d like a sip
willied: with some chimay cheese
willied: religion and intoxication
Sugartits: don’t stand… don’t stand so… don’t stand so close to me…
Sugartits: you just leaned in really close
Sugartits: whoa
YourMoralLeader: is that ok?
willied: wtf just happened?
willied: my monitor just vomited
ElShaddai: I’m not quite sure
Sugartits: I saw belly and I liked it.
ElShaddai: mine too- there was a stop action sequence of luke checking his navel for lint
YourMoralLeader: Sugar, did I ever address you by this name?
Sugartits: not to my knowledge, but we didn’t spend much time talking. 🙂
YourMoralLeader: what were we mainly doing aside from smooching?
QuixoticLass: Luke and sugartits sitting in a tree
Sugartits: It wasn’t a tree, Lass.
bipolardragon: is that a tale
QuixoticLass: it’s a rhyme kids sing
willied: dirty deeds…done dirt cheap
bipolardragon: do you tell that story to your children
Sugartits: Was he sitting in my tail? perhaps
bipolardragon: about luke and the sugartits
bipolardragon: in a tree?
bipolardragon: seems a very postmodern story
Sugartits: I’ve always admired you.
QuixoticLass: luke and sugartits sitting in a tree, k – i – s – s – i – n – g, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage.
YourMoralSchvartze: sugartits is someone from spt
bipolardragon: it’s like a lafontaine story
ElShaddai: what shall they name the baby?
QuixoticLass: that’s the whole rhyme
ElShaddai: emma?
willied: sugartits = nicejewishgirl
ElShaddai: Luke seems old enough to have a child named Emma
willied: xpt did more to promote luke than luke did
QuixoticLass: Luke is old enough to have fathered Emma
bipolardragon: maybe he locks her up in his basement
Sugartits: Luke doesn’t need to self-promote. his work speaks for itself.
willied: australian…not austrian
QuixoticLass: speaking of emma
QuixoticLass: hi Em
bipolardragon: hiiiiiiiii emmaaaaaaaaaaa
Emma: Hey
QuixoticLass: you always come in right on cue
Emma: lol Yep
YourMoralLeader: Hi Emma!
bipolardragon: i think someone calls her on stage
Sugartits: Uh-oh. emma’s here. Time to cut out.
Emma: Hey Luke
YourMoralLeader: hi dear
Sugartits: *smooches* baby
Emma: You ok?
YourMoralLeader: yes
Emma: Good 🙂
QuixoticLass: He professed his love for me today.
Sugartits: I won’t tell Emma, baby. Good seeing you. I watch a lot, but don’t talk much. We need to hook up again soon. gotta run.
bipolardragon: sisterly love
Emma: lol Did he
Emma: Hey Sugar
QuixoticLass: now i’m a good "source"
YourMoralLeader: I will always love you QL for giving me that picture and story
YourMoralLeader: Sugar, don’t leave.
YourMoralLeader: When did we last hook up?
YourMoralLeader: I was a different man then.
YourMoralLeader: I have so many personalities, being with me is always exciting, you never know when my caveman will come out.
willied: did you have any hanky panky when you roomed with maja lee?
YourMoralLeader: Promiscuous sex becomes empty after several decades
QuixoticLass: He’s got the jug out again today…it’s a caveman day
ElShaddai: several decades of promiscuous sex? Man you must be carrying every std known to man
willied: did you clean the hovel for passover like moses told you?
QuixoticLass: come back when you’ve had chocolate and sex and tell us you’re still sad
QuixoticLass: so glad I got that in before he slipped out
willied: emma, what’s the weather in ulster today?
Emma: Sunny 🙂
Emma: I went cycling with my sister today… never again.
willied: great
Emma: She jumped on the back of my bike.. we both feel in a pile of netals
ElShaddai: i hear all women who live together eventual cycle together
Emma: I tired to get up and she sat on me
ElShaddai: Emma I would ease your wounds with a calming salve
willied: duct tape helps get them out
Emma: lol
willied: it prevents terrorism too
ElShaddai: where does it hurt, Emma?
willied: the extinction of duct tape will foretell the apocalypse
Emma: Lol Elshaddai
willied: luke, what’s the jewish end-of-the-world?
YourMoralSchvartze: you can’t buy under retail
QuixoticLass: how surprising Levi
QuixoticLass: I never would have seen that coming
willied: is there a jewish apocalpse
willied: like free bacon, or rob spallone get elected mayor of canoga park?
QuixoticLass: I did tell you….
ElShaddai: Levi who are you to question the Rabbi? If he says take it down, you must. Are you a Rabbi?
willied: or maybe alex panzers ‘e-train’ shows up at grand central in l.a.
ElShaddai: Luke does it occur to you that your troubles with Rabbis may be an inherent fault within yourself?
YourMoralSchvartze: luke why do you hate your father
YourMoralSchvartze: why did you convert to judaism to anger him?
Moses: luke have you read any psalms today?
YourMoralLeader: yes
YourMoralLeader: i hate the psalms
YourMoralLeader: boring
YourMoralSchvartze: they’re so cheerful
YourMoralLeader: oy
YourMoralLeader: I love my daddy
ElShaddai: and now that he has converted he exhibits the same father-issues he had with RevDes with his Rabbis
YourMoralLeader: i’m just like him
Moses: so you hate the torah…wow
ElShaddai: Face it Levi- You are a Rebel without a Shul
Moses: you should be xxxcommunicated
ElShaddai: Will there be sunbathing today?
QuixoticLass: he has a shul
Moses: they dont need any more wildfires
Moses: that shiny white skin is an ignition source
ElShaddai: QL could extinguish those fires, such a wet blanket she can be
QuixoticLass: hey!
YourMoralSchvartze: tuck in your shirt luke
QuixoticLass: I am not a wet blanket
ElShaddai: You are a scratchy woolen blanket, then?
Moses: the hovel is…a hovel
Moses: look at it
