I’m Live On My Cam And Singing ‘Jerusalem’ And ‘Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport’

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Watch the hymn Jerusalem and the Aussie favorite. There’s an old Australian stockman lying dying and he gets up on his elbow and says to his mates gathered around him… "Let me abos go loose, Lou. Let me abos go loose. They’re of no further use, Lou, so let me abos go loose."

Here’s Emma, the 18-year old queen of our chat room!


ChaimAmalek:  I see in the a form of apostacy that must be giving the Rabbinate fits.  For forming his is a new faith, and its exponent is none other than Luke Ford.
Welshdragon:  can u help me chaim?
ChaimAmalek:  Yes, you have come here to worship the Golden Calf, even if it is paper mache
ChaimAmalek:  I can help most of you, yes
wackey:  I came to look at this filthy room
ChaimAmalek:  crack?
ChaimAmalek:  I have not touched any crack in a long time
QuaxoticLass:  do you people even know who amalek is?
Welshdragon:  he’s god’s mate
ChaimAmalek:  They know not
wackey:  who are you to judge
QuaxoticLass:  I suppose that adds to your entertainment chaim
Welshdragon:  warming up nicely
ChaimAmalek:  A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down
ChaimAmalek:  QL, what is your relationship with God like?
wackey:  I will lead you if the dude with the beard won’t
QuaxoticLass:  God and I are acquaintences.  We say hello once a week.
ChaimAmalek:  This won’t help him with the rabbinate, this business of making of oneself a Golden Calf.
QuaxoticLass:  Occasionally, I’ll give Him a ring when stuff gets rough. 
ChaimAmalek:  If you are truely a friend of Luke’s, then speak of other things
Welshdragon:  how do u speak to god Chaim?
kiki:  where the gold cow im skint
ChaimAmalek:  I speak to God in a clear, non-apologetic voice.
QuaxoticLass:  He is my Rock and my Redeemer. 🙂
ChaimAmalek:  "God, please do _______ for me."
wackey:  clenliness is next to Godliness
ChaimAmalek:  Wouldn’t it be something if God had a telephone number?
Emma:  Hello Chaim. How are you?
ChaimAmalek:  I am a bit pensive about unfolding world events, but otherwise in fine spirits
ChaimAmalek:  What do you fine folk do to support yourselves in life?
wackey:  when he’s gone he should put the camera on the TV
DoooDaaa:  im a pimp
kiki:  im a hooker
ChaimAmalek:  I’m a file clerk.
ChaimAmalek:  And where are you fine folks from?
Welshdragon:  getto
kiki:  north wales
wackey:  Pennsyltuckey
DoooDaaa:  South Africa
QuaxoticLass:  my mama
ChaimAmalek:  I see.  Formerly white lands.
DoooDaaa:  Bad Lands
mee:  UK
ChaimAmalek:  I fear that expert thieves might use this feed to target Luke and steal all of his valuables.
wackey:  What valuables
ChaimAmalek:  Indeed he has.
ChaimAmalek:  There is a hole under the mattress
QuaxoticLass:  I thought WE are his valuables
ChaimAmalek:  He has one of Southern California’s finest collection of teffilin.
ChaimAmalek:  Also skull caps.
ChaimAmalek:  He spends his money judiciously
ChaimAmalek:  Adolf Hitler had digestive problems because he chose a life of veganism.
ChaimAmalek:  Be not like Hitler. Listen to the counsel of Amalek and have some salmon.
ChaimAmalek:  Women don’t trust men who won’t eat seafood.

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see Amazon.com). My work has been covered in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and on 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (Alexander90210.com).
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