The “Everything is Bullshit” blog by UCLA psychologist David Pinsof is my most exciting discovery since I found Aaron Renn profiled in the New York Times March 10, 2025 and subscribed to his Substack.
I love this guy’s claim that happiness is a status game. By conventional standards, I do not have high status, but I tell myself I have status because I’m happy.
In 2010, I was talking to some Seventh-Day Adventist faculty at Loma Linda University who knew my dad. One of them said, and I think the rest agreed, that I seemed much happier than my standard. So I stored up that comment and use it bolster my sense of self. Sure, I don’t have my dad’s accomplishments, but darn it, I’m happier than him! And for that, I want you to award me status!
We love to brag about our happiness and we tend to award status to people who embody happiness but it is not clear where there is an evolutionary payoff for happiness.
I am the easiest person in the world to manipulate. Just ask me, “What do you think about X?” Nothing intoxicates me more than your attention.
David Pinsof writes: We want sex. We want to be sexy. We want tasty yum yums for our face-holes. We want to establish dominance, or we want to display submission. We want to stay warm, avoid snakes, use tools, support our tribes, not be on fire, ascend social hierarchies, form alliances, show off our health and virtue, nurture cute babies (preferably ones that share our DNA), and make people feel indebted to us (so they’ll help us in the future when we’re sick or injured).
These are the sorts of things we want—the things that helped our ancestors survive and reproduce. Not happiness.
Once we accept this fact, everything starts to make sense. Why do we read so much bad news? Because scary stuff can kill us and happy stuff can’t. Why are we bored by Positive Psychology? No sex or death in it. Why do we work too much? Status anxiety. Why do we simmer in anger and shitpost on Twitter? Dominance. Why do we beat ourselves up and stay friends with assholes? Submission. Why do we have kids, even though they make us miserable? Come on.
The actual motives of human primates are pretty unflattering, and we would prefer not to talk about them. That’s why we pretend that happiness (or self-actualization or whatever) is the reason for everything we do. It’s the perfect PR story. We run cancer marathons not to show off our health and virtue, but because we find it “rewarding.” We help our friends not to make them feel indebted to us, but because we’re “happy” to do it. “So glad you could make it,” we say to the asshole. “Happy to take care of it,” we say to our boss. We tell people we want to be happy because it sounds good.
