7.2 Earthquake Hits Mexicali

3:40 pm. I’m lying down watching “The Raid on Entebbe” when my hovel starts shaking. I feel like I’m riding a horse. The shaking goes on for about 30 seconds, about the longest I ever remember. Report

My movie — streamed instantly on Netflix — was not interrupted and nothing fell in my hovel.

I sleep beside my refrigerator. When the 2 a.m. earthquake hit a few weeks ago, I woke up and put my hands on the frig to make sure it didn’t topple over on to me.

I’ve stored about five gallons of water (in jugs in the bathroom) for emergencies.

Posted in Los Angeles, Personal | Tagged , , , , | Comments Off on 7.2 Earthquake Hits Mexicali

The Beard

An Orthodox friend calls. “I apologize for making fun of your beard. I was going crazy about charedi Jews. It had nothing to do with you personally. I was at the time ticked off about charedi beards but for you it’s funny. It’s really comical. I’m trying to think of who else has a big shtick like that. Al Gore tried to grow a beard but yours is much more striking.”

Posted in Orthodoxy, Personal | Tagged , , , , | Comments Off on The Beard

See Great Rabbis Naked!

An Orthodox friend calls. “Do you know how you can see great rabbis naked every day? Go to the mikveh. The Hasidim believe in going every morning. Go to the mikveh in the early morning and you can see great rabbis naked.”

Posted in Rabbis | Comments Off on See Great Rabbis Naked!

The Predator

As I walked the mean streets of Pico-Robertson today, I felt weak, tired and vulnerable. I was exhausted. I didn’t want to talk to anyone. I just wanted to run my errands, to pick up my groceries, and to retreat home for the final two days of Passover (holy days when work is forbidden).

I got home and returned to George Gilder‘s book, The Israel Test.

I’m fascinated by its description of game theory (from pages 194-200).

If you are unlikely to have future transactions with somebody, the rational policy is to be predatory. Get all you can get.

The more often you expect to interact with somebody, the more incentive you have to treat them well.

That’s Orthodox Judaism. It is a small world. You repeatedly run into the same people. You have a high incentive to treat them well.

By contrast, when you go to a nightclub in a big city and just look to get laid, you don’t have a lot of incentive to be ethical in your dealings.

Anonymity breeds disgusting behavior.

Posted in Ethics, George Gilder, Personal | Tagged , , , , | Comments Off on The Predator

The David Rubin Story

Bloomberg News reports:

Rubin grew up in L.A.

Posted in David Rubin | Tagged , , , , , | Comments Off on The David Rubin Story

Time To Replace The Church Window?

It probably seemed like a good idea at the time, says the mass email.

Posted in Christianity | Comments Off on Time To Replace The Church Window?

I’ll Always Be There For You

Dear reader, I know that there have been times when I’ve gotten busy and I have not paid as much attention to you as you need, and I want you to know right now that that will end. From now on, I will always be there for you.

Meanwhile, I’m thrilled to discover that all seven seasons of “24” are now available on Netflix’s instant streaming option. I’ve always wanted to see this show and now I can.

I admit I’ve got high expectations. I’m 16 episodes into the first season and I have to admit that I am disappointed. It doesn’t stack up to the BBC show “Spooks” aka “MI-5”.

The writing on 24 is terrible. It’s filled with cliches. The main characters are always telling each other, “I love you.” It’s ludicrous. The writing is too on the button. It’s dull.

My least favorite cliche of this first season is the black presidential candidate telling his son, “I will always be there for you.”

There’s no way that any of us can always be there for anyone. Expecting your spouse or your parent or your friend or your boss to always be there for you is ludicrous. Everybody has multiple demands on his time and there’s no way that any of us can always be available.

We each have to learn to stand on our own two feet and not expect others to always be there for us and we should not promise to always be there for anyone else.

When we feel betrayed, it usually means that somebody who we thought owed us supreme allegiance had competing claims to juggle and chose someone else instead of us.

There’s no point in extracting promises from our loved ones to always be faithful to us, to always be there for us, to never leave us.

Posted in Personal, TV | Tagged , , , , | Comments Off on I’ll Always Be There For You

A Dominican-American Convert To Orthodox Judaism

From The Jewish Press:

Why did you start blogging?

I started the conversion process; I was 25 years old. Every Shabbat meal, someone would ask me, “Why are you in the conversion process?” One of my friends, Drew Kaplan, was a rabbinical student at the time and a blogger, and he said it’d be easier if I just wrote a blog. After Shabbos I could send people to the blog, and it would explain everything . A mission of my blog is to make people more sensitive. The first thing you say is “Hi and welcome,” not “Are you Jewish?”

Do you ever worry that being so frank in a public sphere could harm your husband’s odds of getting a pulpit?

I worry about that every day. You know, it’s been interesting. My mother-in-law’s friends read my blog. My husband applied for an internship and the rabbi read the blog. I guess I’m kind of lucky they liked the blog. It’s not always the case. I get hate mail. Everything from “You’re not being Orthodox” to “You’re not being Dominican.”

What do you gain from the experience?

I keep doing it because you get these letters from all over the world, and people are like, “Thank you for sharing that little bit of yourself with me,” because people can relate – from child abuse, converts, multiple identities; that’s why I keep doing it.

What topics do you cover during your speaking engagements?

The more I come into contact with other converts of color, [I find] a lot of them have had racist experiences. Jews have been blatantly racist to them or they’ve gone to a synagogue event and people have assumed that they’re the help or the janitor. My husband and I use sources, but [also] just telling people how difficult it is, coming in from a different religion, different planet, or how converts cope. We tell one story where a convert’s mother called her to her deathbed and asked that she convert back to Christianity. I don’t think people really understand that – how hard some converts have it.

Posted in Aliza Hausman, Conversion, Orthodoxy, Race | Tagged , , , , , | Comments Off on A Dominican-American Convert To Orthodox Judaism

Converting The Mentally Ill

Orthodox Jews don’t look for converts among non-Jews. They typically turn away three times Gentiles seeking conversion and then only convert them after they have proved themselves.

Now what happens if the convert is sincere but mentally ill?

Different Batei Din (Jewish law courts) and different rabbis have different approaches.

The typical rabbi and the typical Jewish law court are going to be asking themselves if a prospective convert will be more of an asset or a liability to the Jewish people.

In May 2001, when I revealed to the Rabbinical Council of California (RCC) Beit Din that I’d had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome since 1988, Rabbi Avrohom Union raised his hand and said, “That’s a yellow light. It’s not a red light automatically stopping your conversion, it is a caution. Leading a Jewish life is very expensive.”

(Also on my RCC Beit Din that day were Rabbi Daniel Korobkin and, I think, Rabbi Gershon Bess.)

Oh man, did I hate Rabbi Union for that. I started feeling very sorry for myself and sent off an email to my family about this mean rabbi and his insensitivity to my health struggles.

A Jewish conversion court typically asks you in the application if you are in therapy and if you are on any medication.

(I answered honestly in my applications. Some people do and some people don’t answer honestly. Some people are too honest in their applications, listing psycho-tropic medications that Rabbi Union and other rabbis may find disturbing and automatic grounds for expulsion.)

The RCC is about the strictest Beit Din about not allowing people with mental illness convert but even the head of the Los Angeles Beit Din told the Jewish Journal that many of the people who come to him to convert have mental illness.

“My real feeling is if the proper job has been in the conversion process, then [Jews-by-choice] are inherently going to be the most active members of the Jewish community,” said Rabbi David Rue, the head rabbi of the Bet Din of Los Angeles, an Orthodox religious court. “Most members of the Jewish community are not particularly active. But people who go through the conversion process — the men end up going to shul every day, the women go every Shabbos, and they are more active than then vast majority of the people in their communities. If the person doesn’t have a Jewish identity, then why are you converting them?”

Rue said that his court receives 1,500 conversion applications every year. Of those, he said, one-third of the applications come from Christians trying to infiltrate the Jewish community to convert other Jews, and another third come from people “that are crazy.” Of the remaining third, half drop out after an initial interview, where Rue explains the kind of commitment required to lead an Orthodox life.

“That cuts it down to 200 people, and then you get all sorts of reasons why things don’t work out,” Rue said. “So we [ended up with] 64 conversions out of 1,500 applicants [a year]. But I can say that after five years, at least 95 percent [of the people his court converted] are still observant.”

When Rabbi Abner Weiss ran the Los Angeles Beit Din conversion program, he converted several people with mental health issues. To the best of my knowledge, these people went on to lead observant lives and to integrate themselves to the best of their ability into the Orthodox Jewish community.

A few years ago, Rabbi Avrohom Union got burned. He converted a woman who was bipolar and she went on, five years later, to live with a shvartze (non-Jewish black guy).

So these days, Rabbi Union has little compunction about declaring somebody mentally ill and using that as reason to eject him from his conversion program.

Rabbi Union has a masters degree in Psychology from Pepperdine and he seems to have confidence in his ability weed out the mentally ill from his program.

Other Batei Din are more lenient. They understand that someone might need to be on medication or in therapy to lead a normal life and this is not grounds for dismissal.

Email makes it easier for rabbis to spot the mentally ill, because many folks with mania (such as myself) send off long crazy emails at times.

The Orthodox Jewish law courts in Los Angeles are generally careful in who they convert. According to what I hear, more than 90% of converts in each of the Orthodox conversion programs remain Sabbath-observant.

The rabbis who run these conversion programs can seem to the prospective convert like they have a lot of power. It is easy to hate the Rabbi Unions of the world, they’ve certainly devastated the lives of many of my friends, but these guys are just gatekeepers. They are there to test your mettle.

I’ve often made the mistake in my life of hating gatekeepers. That was stupid. I think I became wiser when I learned to recognize and respect their role and to use them as spurs for my own self-improvement.

I learned about gatekeepers in a book called “The Writer’s Journey” and it helped me to come to peace with what happened to me at the RCC.

I read it in 2003, a couple of years after Rabbi Union expelled me from the RCC’s conversion program.

Here’s a good link on the hero’s journey: “A portal or threshold represents the transition into the world of adventure, the step of �Crossing the First Threshold.� A sense of danger as well as opportunity is conveyed. The threshold guardian or “gatekeeper” must test the hero�s mettle for competency before he may enter the realm. Gatekeepers are terrifying creatures such as Cerberus (the three-headed dog of the Underworld), Pan, ogres, and shape-shifters of classical mythology.”

Posted in Conversion, Personal, R. Avrohom Union, R. David Rue | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Converting The Mentally Ill

About Last Night

A former yeshiva girl writes:

My friend came back and told me the details of her night. The last time I saw her she was sitting downstairs with a couple of her friends. The night went as follows: The bartender�s name was Paul. Paul was a good-looking, Irish man in his thirties. But the best thing about Paul was not the glimmer in his brown eyes, nor the accent that made a vodka shot sound exotic, rather, it was the fact that Paul found my friend pretty cute, and gave her the drinks for free. All in all, she said, it was a great night.
A little later, another friend of mine came to my room to tell me the details of her night. She told me about the religious text that she sought to get to the bottom of. She was so excited that she set aside the entire night – a Saturday night, where bookishness is grounds for being ostracized � to give herself the proper amount of time to understand it. But instead, she told me, she spent the entire night in the study hall discussing a particularly frustrating situation that a friend of hers had put her in. I know it wasn�t really so nice, she concluded, but her friend had done something particularly Mean-Girl-esq and she really needed to vent. She came back frustrated with a bucket filled with more mean things to say about her friend.
So � who is the better Jew?
I looked at these two situations and considered what a Jewish lifestyle entails. There are the aesthetic necessities that come with being part a particular club, any club. In the Orthodox word our �costumes� are modest dress for girls and kippot for boys. The internal factors, however, we leave up to the judgment of heaven. But can you get by with just looking the part, or is there more to the production of a Godly life than the lights, hair and makeup?
Yes � in the light of what people have deemed �inappropriate,� many of the real laws and statues that we see referred to time and time again by the Big Man have been put aside by certain individuals. Instead, everyone is busy ensuring that the group of people whose approval they seek deem them �frum.�
Technically, my friend who went to a bar did nothing wrong (okay, so this isn�t exactly true � there may be issues here, but we�ll leave the nitty, gritty aside for the moment). She was wearing her skirt, refrained from touching any members of the opposite sex, and even with a drink or two inside of her � there was no coyote ugly action going on. In fact, she told me, her friends even mocked her as she ensured to say a blessing before downing her shots.
And my other friend, in her long black skirt, sitting in the study hall with her religious text in front of her, spent the entire night bad mouthing another girl � who, between you and I, didn�t actually do anything wrong.
Chances are, many people would look at my friend who went to a bar one night and deem her � �not that frum.� And then take a look at my bookish friend and say � �wow, ain�t that a nice maidel?�
So, while I�m still leaving the judgment of the internal up to God, I can�t help but ask myself � is it finally time we stop looking at how long our tzitzit strings are and remind ourselves of what we�re really supposed to be doing here?
I recently heard Chief Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks says: �God�s the judge � leave it up to Him.�
I really tried to � but then I realized that over the course of writing this observation � I have judged both my friends, neither of who deserves to be judged; certainly not by me. Shoot.
Maybe I�m the one who has to work on getting into character a bit more.

Posted in Jews | Tagged , , , , , | Comments Off on About Last Night