‘May You Have A Sweet Year’

A lot of people have come out of the woodwork of late to wish me a good year. Some of them actually mean it. They actually believe that our fate for the next year will be sealed during the next eleven days.

I’m not much for the niceties that lubricate social life. I don’t like to say goodbye. I don’t like to say, "We must get together again soon," unless I really mean it. I don’t like to say, "Remember me to Joe."

I haven’t called or emailed anyone to wish them a sweet new year (let alone pulled anyone aside to apologize for needlessly hurting them over the past year).

I don’t deny this fundamental Jewish teaching. I just don’t understand it.

Pops emails: "That’s because you’re NOT a fair-dinkum Jew, son! You can’t even read Hebrew! You’re a phony and a fraud. I ought too bash some sense into you with a shovel."

Frankly, I don’t want to understand it. It is metaphysical and I am more interested in the physical.

guest9: Do they have any gay and lesbian shuls?
YourMoralLeader: yes
guest9: You should join one.  They would love you! 
guest9: And with them being so open and liberal, you’ll never get kicked out!
guest9: And you said before gay men flock to you.
YourMoralLeader: It’s not the kind of flocking I want.

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see Amazon.com). My work has been followed by the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (Alexander90210.com).
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