I Want To Learn How To Tell My Story

I saw a flyer yesterday for a ten-week workshop for low-income men and women to tell their stories. These poor buggers would learn about writing it up and delivering it in public.

I thought this could help me overcome my shyness, particularly with the opposite sex.

I’m poor. I figured I qualified. I figured I was a poster-boy for poverty.

So I applied and then I found out that the grant underwriting the workshop specified that low-income meant earning less than $15,000 a year.

I make more than that.

I can not tell a lie.

I guess I’ll have to figure out other ways to tell my story.

All I need is some female attention. Then I blossom and become quite gregarious.

Like the song says, I need love (but only within the strictest halachic boundaries rigorously enforced by the surliest RCC rabbis and kashrut-supervising convicted sex offender).

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see Amazon.com). My work has been followed by the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (Alexander90210.com).
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