I feel like I am more in control of my life than ever before. Through Alexander Technique, I’ve learned to inhibit many of my habitual responses that don’t serve me. Through psycho-therapy, I’ve gained clarity on my emotions, thoughts and actions. Through Orthodox Judaism, I have a clear sense of who I am and what my responsibilities are.
Is this sense of mastery I’m feeling over my life an illusion? Are my addictions running my life or am I running my life?
I feel like I am running my life. I feel like I have free will. Yet, when I look back on my life, I see that almost all of the choices I made were fated.
I was fated to break down into chronic illness. I was fated to not pursue my studies in economics. I was fated to flirt with acting before settling down to my true calling of writing. I was fated to investigate underworlds. I was fated to write about Dennis Prager.
Dennis Prager is fated to run for president in 2012.
I’m fated to do important writing on the forthcoming election.
