So, you’re a sex addict. Where do you turn for help? Do you just read lukeford.net every day and go from there to shul? Or do you want to work a program?
Do you want a 12-step program? Well, which one? There are four.
The old hardy standby is Sexaholics Anonymous. These ones tend to meet in churches. They have strong Christian overtones. They’re strict. They’re for men only and pretty much for married men only and I believe their focus is on keeping married men faithful.
Ironically, this is the type of meeting where you are most likely to meet Orthodox Jews.
Then there’s Sex Addicts Anonymous. Again, this is pretty much for men. It’s not as strict and is not as Christian. The focus is strongly on sex and porn and masturbation.
Then there’s Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous. This is for men and women. There’s a lot of talk about relationships. It’s as strict or as loose as you want to be. Some hot chicks show up to these in Los Angeles so beware of sexual temptation. It can lead you down the garden path to helpless humping and that makes Jesus cry.
And there’s Sexual Compulsives Anonymous. According to the website: “Members are encouraged to develop their own sexual recovery plan and to define sexual sobriety for themselves.”
This is almost all men.
The sex addiction therapy movement is much stronger on the West Coast than on the East Coast and much stronger in the United States than elsewhere.
If you want to check out a 12-step program, an open AA meeting would probably be best. The sex programs are aimed at those with sexual addiction and many if not most meetings are closed to those who identify.
The growing number of self-help groups for sex addicts is an indicator of how much influence the religious right has in the United States. Organizations like Sex Addicts Anonymous and Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, which now has a branch in Germany, are permeated with deeply conservative ideas and see liberal attitudes toward sex and relationships as nothing less than a disease.
The pioneers at Sexaholics Anonymous warn: “Sexual desire is an unrestrained feeling that drives us to abuse ourselves, others or objects for self-involved, destructive purposes.” Sexaholics Anonymous advocates a twelve-step program based on the Alcoholics Anonymous program.
Crystal Renaud says she’s “clean” today, living an abstinent life and only sharing her apartment with her dog.
But experts have built an opposition to the new generation of anti-sex crusaders. Is “sex addiction” really a disease requiring treatment, like alcoholism? Does such a disease even exist?
