The Happiest Moment Of My Life

I knew this girl at school. She was super cute. Busty. Asian. Sweet. Shy. Christian!

Just how I love ’em!

I thought I’d never have her. That’s how my life had been — that which I wanted most — a mother, health, community, stability, friends — was always out of reach.

Surely this fine Christian girl would be no different.

We parted ways when illness forced me to drop out of school.

Somehow, I got her mailing address. Though I was feeling low, I didn’t want to come across to my dream girl as needy. So I limited myself to writing her once or twice a year.

And half the time, she wrote me back.

I had so much that I wanted to share with her. I wanted to tell her about my desperation and my fear and my loss of hope, but to the best of my ability, I kept an upbeat tone with my letters.

In the darkness of my life, however, I fantasized about her and the field of dreams that was her body.

I’d never had a busty girlfriend, you see. God hadn’t blessed me that way.

The years rolled by. I feared I’d never get well.

And then I did. Sorta. All thanks to a skinny girl 11 years my senior with A-cup breasts.

I came back to Westwood in March 1994. Staying alone in a friend’s apartment, I called my dream girl and a couple of days later, she came over.

We sat on the porch on the fourth floor and looked out at the city.

She’d aged — she was about 24 now and a recent university graduate — and she wasn’t as hot as six years previous, but she was still my fantasy.

And as we sat in the sun, I did something very unusual for me — I turned the conversation towards sex.

A few seconds later, she leaned over and kissed me on the lips.

I kissed her back and then took her in my arms — my heart swelling — and pulled her inside, slowly removing her clothes.

When the last vestige was gone and she told me she was a virgin and I lay with her on my bed, that was the happiest moment in my life. I had what I wanted most.

I was 27 years old. I had two-thirds of my health back. I was at UCLA. I had my (Reform) conversion to Judaism. And in my arms, I held my naked dream girl.

I was like the victor in World War II standing in a French wheat field in the May sun with my arms spread wide proclaiming, “Soon there will be plenty!”

That Spring of 1994, I was cock sure there’d always be plenty of love in my life.

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see My work has been followed by the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (
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