I’m listening to this Lifelong Success program by Igor Ledochowski.
I can’t believe I’ve listened to lecture number six on self-esteem three times!
Normally I can’t be bothered to listen to anything on self-esteem. I loathe the topic. I can’t stand talk about self-love.
But Igor Ledochowski got through to me when he made the point that when you feel solid in an area of your life, nothing people can say to you in that area can hurt you. You’re solid. You’re impervious to people putting you down in that area. You just feel sorry for people who try to shake your confidence in that area.
If you’re at peace with yourself in a part of your life, you can’t be bothered by the comments of others. This has nothing to do with being perfect, it is all about being at peace with yourself.
Here are some areas of my life where criticism does not hurt me:
* My decision to convert to Judaism.
* My beard.
* My decision to train to teach Alexander Technique.
* My blog posts where I have been fair and balanced and accurate.
* My decision to spend years in therapy.
* My decision to pray every day and to study Torah and to do mitzvahs.
Here are areas of my life where criticism does hurt me:
* When somebody points out to me how I have unnecessarily hurt someone and done harm. When I have used somebody.
* When I have written something unfair or inaccurate.
So in what areas can people hurt you? Only in those areas of your life where you don’t feel solid, where you are not at peace with yourself and the decisions you are making.
Igor made a similar point about positive mental attitude, another phrase that typically turns my mind off, but Igor points out that while not all successful people have a positive mental attitude about all of their life, all successful people have a positive mental attitude in those areas of life where they are successful.
I listen to Igor’s lectures and his guided meditations every night before I go to bed (and often listen to them more when I wake up in the night and can’t sleep).