The Remains Of A Bat Mitzvah

I am told: I went yesterday to Sportsmen’s Lodge and I found the the remains of a bat mitzvah from this past Saturday. Approximately 500 copies of a pink pamphlet were scattered all over floor. Each booklet had on the cover a quite provocative picture of the bat mitzvah girl and contained several pages of holy writings and prayers with G-d’s name. The papers say that the bat mitzvah was officiated by cantor Judy Fox. It seems like the bat mitzvah girl grew up in a lesbian family, both parents names were female names. The girl’s name was “Jordan Kass Ellison” and her parents signed their names as “Jane and Carrie.”