And it is the book I most need to read.
When I have love in my life, I put most of my emotions (providing that everything else in my life is in order) into that and I bob up and down depending on the success of my love life.
I don’t have a strong sense of self. I depend on the success of my love life to feel good about myself.
I’m up to page 151. Here’s an excerpt: “One property of marital systems is the vulnerability of increasing importance of one’s partner: your partner’s increasing importance over time naturally increases your vulnerability, which in turn fosters sexual boredom and low desire.”
Dr. Schnarch begins the book with this point — nobody is ready for marriage. Marriage makes you ready for marriage.