Category Archives: Personal

‘Not Around Here!’

* A friend was stuck at a university graduation ceremony listening to mind-numbing speeches, so he started grading the women (Cutie Pie Index) and related the scores to his son, who, a good lefty, became appalled, put his hand over … Continue reading

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I found myself giggling last night for the first time in three months

I was talking to my therapist about how it is easier to feel good about yourself when you get external validation but I’ve learned through therapy I have to build up internal validation, which is hard work. And then I … Continue reading

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Understanding My Love Life

The best book I’ve read on love is Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find and Keep Love. It answered all of my big questions and made sense of my life. For the … Continue reading

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How come there are so many hotties in Chabad?

Even the most religious Lubavitch women frequently wear tight stylish colorful outfits in the latest fashion, luxurious sheitels, high ****-me pumps and the whole megillah. Why Lord do You tempt me so sorely like this when I only want to … Continue reading

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I’m Tired Of Trying To Pass As A White Man

I’m ready to embrace my inner brotha. Bein black and representin sounds awesome. Crackin open a 40 right now, Old English is just how I roll, I’m trading in my ales for malts, nice and thick like my hos. Goin … Continue reading

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The Lentil Loaf

I had this shiksa GF Holly. She didn’t understand what I ate. She wanted to make dinner for me. I suggested she ask my mother for a recipe and provided my mom’s email address. My mom emailed Holly back a … Continue reading

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Does She Love Me Back?

Dear Diary, It’s been five weeks since I was here. Wow, what a long discouraging CFS relapse. Down over two months. But I’m back. I was struggling, feeling down and hopeless and alone. I gave up almost all writing. I … Continue reading

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My Unrighteous Mind

In Antonio Damasio’s book Descartes’ Error: Emotion, Reason, and the Human Brain, he writes about people who suffer an injury to the ventromedial pre-frontal cortex (VMPFC) just behind the bridge of the nose. “Their emotionality dropped nearly to zero. They … Continue reading

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I Want To Go South Of The Border

A few years ago, Chaim Amalek placed a singles ad for me on craigslist. The hottest date I had from it was with a Mexican lady, ten years younger than me, who appeared to be “the whole package” as she … Continue reading

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Let Me Wallow Just A Little Bit Longer

So I was whining about my sadness to my therapist tonight (this feeling was brought on by an amazing meal I had on Rosh Hashanah and how happy I am with my friend and that made me sad when I … Continue reading

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