How to Live in a Lower Trust Nation

Aaron Renn writes:

Loyalty is the coin of the realm. Disclosing personal emails, even if from an ex-friend, to the media in order to try to harm someone is treasonous.

It’s also to be expected. In a lower trust society, we can no longer assume that even our friends won’t betray us. This is doubly true if the friend has different politics from you. And it’s triply true if you are a conservative and your friend is a liberal, because liberals are more likely to unfriend you over politics…

We have to take stock of the new reality and simply put less trust in other people. It’s a good rule of thumb that you should not put anything in an email, text, or group chat unless you think you could handle the heat if it were published in the Times. Again, you especially can’t fully trust anyone with the opposite politics here.

We have to take account of the cold reality that we no longer live in a world of gentlemen, or one that lives by the old values…

[We should] find ways to build our own moral communities, whether in a church, a friend group, etc., where it’s possible to establish in-group standards that allow higher trust relationships to flourish.

In an essay on the quest for community, Aaron Renn wrote:

Our society deems any non-ideologically approved groups illegitimate. So any all male groups that aren’t devoted to some type of struggle sessions are going to be attacked. That’s why, as I’ve noted before, many of these men’s groups are now essentially underground and illegible.

What does it mean to be less legible?

Aaron Renn wrote:

…if you are not legible to the government and other entities, it is harder for those entities to impose their mandates on you.

One example is the growth of informal men’s retreats. As I’ve noted before, all men’s groups and organizations are heavily stigmatized in our society, and outright illegal in many cases. Church men’s groups, some remaining single sex schools, fraternities, and a few other groups are basically what’s left, and many of them have a target on their back. Witness the years long jihad the New York Times ran against the Augusta National Golf Club to bully them into admitting women.

What’s more, even if an all male organization managed to exist, becoming a member of it could be hazardous to your health, so to speak, if the media decided to make an issue of it, as they’ve been known to do.

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How Richard Reeves is making it acceptable for the center-left to address the challenges facing today’s boys and men

Aaron Renn writes:

I think it’s important to have people on the center-left talking about men’s issues. If we care about actually improving the lives of men, then we don’t want the goal of helping men flourish to become partisan coded, because if it does then Democrats will reflexively oppose it and it will become yet another victim of gridlock…

The major institutions of society, like the major media, are on the left. So naturally they are going to prefer their own. The Brookings Institution, where Reeves worked when writing his book, confers social legitimacy in the way conservative organizations apart from perhaps AEI don’t yet do so…

It’s also notable that Reeves is a man. You’ll notice that many of the people who comment on men’s issues, even in a pro-male way, are women…

You have to be willing to advocate for yourself. Men can’t outsource self-advocacy to women…

The feminist movement’s success depended on telling men they had to change, that there were certain choices and behaviors they could no longer engage in. It also explicitly reallocated resources and positions from men to women.

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Why Are Churches Anti-Men? (3-12-25)

01:00 Aaron Renn: When Selfishness Becomes Celebrated: How modern culture repackages marital abandonment as radical self-love, with little counter-narrative from religious voices,
https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/selfish-abandonment
09:00 Dennis Prager’s First Public Message
11:00 Rodney Martin needs your prayers
24:00 Aaron Renn: Tradcons Are the Enemy of the American Man, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/tradcons-are-the-enemy-of-the-american
30:00 How to navigate a low trust America, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/betrayal
39:00 There’s Never Been a Better Time to Be a Man in America, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/a-good-time-to-be-a-man
45:20 How J.D. Vance Avoided Becoming Pete Buttigieg, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/vance-buttigieg
52:00 The Basis of Attraction, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/newsletter-17-the-basis-of-attraction
57:20 The Valorization of Selfishness: Society’s message today is too often that you should care more about yourself and your own pleasure, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/selfishness
1:06:00 Christians are not persecuted in America but all is not well, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/persecution
1:15:00 NYT: At Columbia, Tension Over Gaza Protests Hits Breaking Point Under Trump, https://www.nytimes.com/2025/03/12/nyregion/columbia-university-trump-protests.html
1:22:00 The differences and implications of the buffered identity vs the porous identity, https://lukeford.net/blog/?p=159273
1:27:20 Mark Halperin on Trump’s First 100 Days, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kJC46Ng110k
1:36:00 More Universities Are Choosing to Stay Neutral on the Biggest Issues, https://www.nytimes.com/2025/03/11/us/institutional-neutrality-universities-free-speech.html
1:40:00 Women and the Attractiveness Curve, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/newsletter-18-women-and-the-attractiveness
1:55:00 Implications of the Rise of Online Dating, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/newsletter-50-the-truth-about-online
2:01:00 NYT: Ambitious Democrats Have a New Game Plan: Yak It Up About Sports, https://www.nytimes.com/2025/03/09/us/politics/democrats-sports-podcasts-male-voters.html
2:07:00 All events are ephemeral, https://www.ft.com/content/c0734fa8-9b29-4f8e-848d-589dc92edbb8
2:12:45 Why do Christian men keep proclaiming: “I’m Not Worthy of This Woman”, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/im-not-worthy-of-this-woman
2:16:20 Here’s What Conservative Institutional Capture Looks Like, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/capturing-institutions
2:21:00 Beauty Is Not Just in the Eye of the Beholder, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/beauty
2:24:00 Anti-Trump evangelicals are very organized and well-funded, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/the-resistance-will-be-organized
2:26:00 Anti-Trump evangelicals are very organized and well-funded, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/the-resistance-will-be-organized
2:31:00 Aaron Renn: Affinity Group Migration and the Quest for Community, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/the-resistance-will-be-organized
2:36:00 Become Illegible: In the negative world, people should look at ways to become less visible to governments and other entities
2:40:50 Why Men Hate Going to Church (with David Murrow), https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqeJFtMD-k4
2:48:00 The Emergence of the Post-Religious Right, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/the-emergence-of-the-post-religious
2:54:00 Conservative Elites Prefer Living in Progressive Elite Cities, https://www.aaronrenn.com/p/conservative-elites-prefer-living
3:01:00 The Kingdom, the Power, and the Glory: American Evangelicals in an Age of Extremism, https://claremontreviewofbooks.com/protestant-deformation/
3:16:00 Jesse Waters

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Democrats & MSM Rally To Defense Of Hamas Agitator Mahmoud Khalil (Columbia University) 3-12-25)

https://www.nytimes.com/2025/03/12/us/yale-suspends-scholar-terrorism.html
https://www.nytimes.com/2025/03/12/nyregion/mahmoud-khalil-detention-hearing.html

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How To Decode The News (3-12-25)

News Is A Stress Test, https://lukeford.net/blog/?p=147167
What Should You Expect From The News?, https://lukeford.net/blog/?p=146911
How The News Differs From Reality, https://lukeford.net/blog/?p=144347
HBO’s Small Town News & That Noble Dream: The ‘Objectivity Question’ (8-3-21), https://lukeford.net/blog/?p=141668
Can We Be Happy When The News Does Not Go Our Way?, https://lukeford.net/blog/?p=131747
Most News Is Unimportant, https://lukeford.net/blog/?p=131296
All events are ephemeral (so you study them if you enjoy it, not as evidence that you are superior): https://www.ft.com/content/c0734fa8-9b29-4f8e-848d-589dc92edbb8
News, goodness and great sex don’t pay for themselves (6-14-23), https://rumble.com/v2u9se9-news-goodness-and-great-sex-dont-pay-for-themselves-6-14-23.html

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