‘I Thought You People Didn’t Drink Soda’

I ordered a $1.65 cup for the soda fountain at a goyisha cafeteria in Norwalk this afternoon.

The friendly Hispanic lady behind the counter said to me, pulling on imaginary sidecurls (payos): "I thought you people didn’t drink soda."

"Not many of us do," I said. "Maybe a Diet Coke."

I got my drink and sat down. The radio was tuned to black music.

An overweight but cute 40ish black lady behind me started dancing.

"You go girl!" I encouraged.

She told me as she danced that she was going to really dance today but that last week in this very cafeteria, she gave a male stranger a lap dance. "But I’m not going to give you one."

I haven’t had a lap dance in my life. I have truly preserved my purity and my wife will be grateful on our wedding night.

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see Amazon.com). My work has been followed by the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (Alexander90210.com).
This entry was posted in Personal and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.