I was having a gentle morning conversation when suddenly the woman said, "How old is the world?"
Wow. "About five billion years," I said. "I think that’s the scientific consensus."
"But what about the Torah?"
"I don’t take the first eleven chapters of Genesis literally."
"If you had said 5769 years, I don’t know how I would’ve gotten my mind around it."
"I’m embarrassed to admit this, but in college, I was the president of the Jewish student group ATID. And when we had money left over near the end of the school year, I had us buy weed. ATID Weed."
"You’re a bad girl."
"I had never gotten an aliya. I was told I would die. You can’t. Lightning would strike. I menstruate. I had a bat mitzvah. It was eye opening. I led the prayers. My best experience with Judaism was that year. For that year, I really got into non-Orthodox forms of Judaism. I became fascinated by Mordecai Kaplan and Reconstructionist Judaism."
"After 18 years in yeshiva, and a year in Israel, I was just like Captain Destructo. I was lighting fires."
"I’m having dinner tonight with author Josh Alan Friedman."
"IS HE ORTHODOX, because if so I automatically lose respect for him and his intellect.
"I’m so tired, I’m going to bed."
"I’m coming over. I want you to prepare. Say tehillim."