I’m Gonna Go ‘Kite Runner’ On You!

Here are my videos:

The SOASstudent posts about my first video: "At 3:25 you refer to his second wife as a "journalist". She wrote brief, idiotic, inane, ungrammatical, misspelled ‘think pieces’ for a rag in a town called Bahawalpur. French’s "authorized" biography is self serving and sanitized. And its not "IN Sir Vidia’s Shadow", as you call it). 9:19 you say "his race-baiting strikes me as comic". Theroux made the point that if Naipaul said about Jews what he’d said about blacks, he would be a pariah and not gotten the Nobel. do you agree?"

SOASStudent posts about my second video: "0:36 Naipaul "is a black man" now? Are you blind? Then at 1:37 you say the word nigger "can be used for good or evil". But you dont bother to give an example of how it can be used for good, and you dont even have the balls to say the word in this video. Why dont you go up to a black man and casually use the word in conversation, then if he objects, then see how he responds to this carefully thought out argument."

Luke says: Well, mate, because of hysteria like yours, the word "nigger" has mystical evil powers for many weak-minded people. All words can be used for good or for evil. When people who are friends use the word privately, particularly if everyone in the conversation is black, and no harm or dehumanization is advocated, then nobody is hurt. I certainly see nothing wrong with black friends calling each other "nigger." That’s the way they roll. Who am I to judge?

On certain streets around me, "African-American" is punk ass sissy talk that no self-respecting gangbanger would ever let upon his lips. He’d soon suck white donkey dong.

In South-Central Los Angeles, the word "nigger" is often used in a positive and life-affirming way that even Oprah would approve of, as in, "Hey nigger, give me all your money or I’ll put a cap in your ass."

On the other hand, my white Jewish boss often calls me "nigg." He says this to demean me. This is bad. He’s subtly implying that I have an African-American work ethic, which, in his view, is a bad thing and is the reason he is always late to pay me.

He’s liable to say things like, "How is a shoe store like the post office? They’re both filled with a thousand black loafers."

Given the history of race-relations in America, "nigger" is generally a bad word for non-black Americans to use on black people. On the other hand, black people raised in the darkest parts of Africa may well employ the term on each other to add some frisson to an otherwise dreary existence.

The morality of all words is determined by context. When a Jewish friend of mine vents about "kikes" and he does it in a certain private context where he’s focusing on certain Jews of the Left, I don’t take offense. There are certain bad Jews he objects to and to describe his feelings most accurately he uses the word "kike." Big deal.

I don’t use the "cunt" word, not publicly anyway, but if my lawfully wedded wife in a moment of cock-drunk ecstacy implored me to "kiss my cunt," I see no sin in her using this graphic term (though the act itself may be an abomination). On the other hand, if my rabbi said this to me in shul while I was pulling the Torah out of the ark and the entire congregation was on their feet and singing holy words, I’d be taken aback.

There is a time and a place for everything, even for playing "The Commandant and the Jew" and for acting out a certain scene from "The Kite Runner."

"Gonna go Kite Runner on you," is a delightful phrase I use on many of my dates.

I’m not sure I agree with Paul Theroux. Anti-Semitic writers have won numerous Nobel prizes for Literature, including that bloke in Portugal recently. Racism and bigotry should not disqualify someone from prizes for Literature. The Nobel Peace Prize, maybe.

Plenty of great writers have hated Jews, including many of the writers of the New Testament and of the Great Books of Western Civilization (Goethe, Hegel, Marx, etc). Great writers are still great even if they dislike Jews or blacks or Mexicans.

I don’t recall Sir Vidia advocating that anyone harm blacks or any group of people. Therefore, I think his jokes are pretty close to harmless. If they’re not funny, that’s not a big deal.

I’m sorry to use so many naughty words in this blog post, but this is the way hale and hearty heterosexual sons of the Southern Cross communicate their feelings to those they love.

So set me Abos loose, Bruce, they’re of no further use.

David Deutsch emails: "Actually, very nice.  But I would have simply replied "I refuse to respond to someone whose use of the term "rag" to refer to a newspaper in Bawalpur that employed female writers suggests that he is both racist and sexist.""

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see Amazon.com). My work has been covered in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and on 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (Alexander90210.com).
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