This National Review-style Twitter feed is brilliant!
* Wishing all my fellow Americans a Merry Traditional Holiday Greetings! Enjoy your Winter Season Festivities! Happy Hanukkah! Happy Kwanzaa!
* Sometimes Trump speaks frankly to his supporters, without artifice, almost as if they’re his co-citizens. Weird. Truly a #ChaosCandidate!
* The Great Schlong Debacle of 2015 highlights the importance of politicians adequately focus-grouping and rehearsing their every soundbite.
* The American on the street prefers political candidates whose attacks on their opponents are equal parts sanctimony and passive aggression.
* I think I speak for all red-blooded Americans when I say icky language is a total dealbreaker when we’re looking for strong leadership.
* I like my Christianity like I like my conservatism: with a keen eye on the vicissitudes of public opinion and an eagerness to apologize.
* Yes! There’s still a future for us Christians if we get the courage to admit some of God’s words were kinda bigoted.
* This Trump/Putin backpatting is scary. American needs a POTUS who’s unremittingly hostile to the world’s second-biggest nuclear superpower.
* It’s not for us citizens to pry into affairs above our heads. Our officials know what they’re doing.
* People you vote into office should look out for your interests? Heh. Take that naivete back to whatever hicktown you crawled from, buddy.
* This why you have to take layman opinions of Congressional deals with a grain of salt. It’s all very complex stuff. Advanced. Not for rubes.
* Might seem counter-intuitive, but sometimes the best move in politics is to cede everything to your opponents while shitting on your voters.
* Glad to see @SpeakerRyan is already continuing the spirit of compromise and goodwill that served us so well during the Boehner years.
* The reason my timeline is filled with tweets about Donald Trump is that he’s a total clown and beneath contempt and not a serious candidate.
* Think of the planning it would take to get someone to walk into a rally and shout “Sieg Heil” on camera. Not buying this “plant” conspiracy.
* Cruz’s performance in the debate tonight was masterful, nay, presidential! I expect to his numbers surge in the coming weeks.
* All I know is that when Jeb draws crowds in the tens of thousands, no individual in *them* ever shouts “Sieg Heil.” Riddle me that.
* Arriving at opinions about your country is best done under the supervision of trained professionals.
* Once again I have literally shit my pants over something an alleged Trump supporter said at a rally, and I bet Trump won’t even apologize!
* We need someone with a demonstrated capacity to make brave stands and rally support in the face of withering opposition. We need Ted Cruz!
* A POTUS bold enough to stop the ongoing Third World invasion of the US would be nice… but only if his messaging meets GOP brand standards.
* I don’t see how you can even call yourself conservative unless your candidate passes my 117-item ideological purity checklist.
* If Trump were really pro-jobs, you think he’d be a little more respectful of people in keystone American industries like political punditry.
* Couldn’t be more excited to be aboard the J̶e̶b̶ ̶W̶a̶l̶k̶e̶r̶ ̶F̶i̶o̶r̶i̶n̶a̶ ̶C̶a̶r̶s̶o̶n̶ ̶R̶u̶b̶i̶o̶ Cruz train!
* Sad to see that the fear of strong women extends even to our most elite warfighters. I hope to see them man up soon!
* Can’t wait until the RNC bans all Trump supporters, and we can get back to politely losing the culture war and whining about the lib media.
* We have a system. The DC machine picks your candidate. You vote for them. It works! What kind of demagogue monster would disrupt that?
* Demagoguery is the low down dirty trick where you hijack the democratic process by appealing directly to the interests of your constituents.
* How does Democrat-run Portland differ from, say, Chicago, Detroit, New Orleans, or Baltimore… Why isn’t it just as violent? Total mystery.
* I know it’s Democrat governance that turns US cities into warzones, I’m just trying to figure out how Portland escaped that fate… Hmmm…
* My interest is in preserving the conservative movement and whichever of our values liberals decide I’m allowed to hold in polite society.
* So if I’m reading this Constitution correctly, the phrase “free exercise of religion” means anyone gets to move here. Checkmate, Trumpkins.
* Where will it end? The GOP extremist fringe is alienating our very best pre-pubescent Youtube celebrities of color.
* I’m devastated. Devastated. A fellow pundit I loved for his brilliant political mind (and not his race) has left us.
