The Jewish Walk Of Shame

I usually leave the house by 6 a.m. weekdays so I can walk to shul and learn Talmud and say the morning prayers with my community.

Convinced of my own righteousness, I pay little attention to the noise I make walking down the stairs in the morning until the goyim complain.

“Every day you’ve made progressively more noise going down the stairs in the morning,” said a neighbor.

Oy, I don’t want a pogrom in Pico-Robertson. I better think less about my own righteousness and more about the blissful sleep of the Gentiles. When they get grouchy, it’s not good for the Jews. Better to have them remain in their moral stupor. Better for me to walk down the stairs in the morning like I am deeply ashamed.

God chose the Jews to be the MasterRace of mankind. However, He soon realized that this had cruel consequences for the less intelligent goyim of creation, so to protect them from the depredations of the Jews while still providing free will to one and all, he gave the Jews the Torah (both written and oral) by which they might be fenced in. Rest assured that those Jews who today live on the Torah Corral (like myself and Chaim Amalek) are no threat to the gentle gentiles of the world. It is the secular liberal Jew, with his notions of Marxism, tolerance of the sodomite and the transgendered, creator both of socialism and feminism, who is the mortal enemy of the gentile world. I say this in the hope that when you goyim awake from your deep moral stupor (an increasingly unlikely event) and begin dealing with the Jew problem in your midst, you will leave me alone. I hope this clears everything up.

Pornographer turned pastor Donny Pauling posts to my FB: “Luke, it’s interesting that you (as a former gentile) use derogatory words for gentiles. Do you honestly think you, as a “convert”, are accepted as if born into your beliefs?”

According to, the first result for goyim is: “Used as a disparaging term for one who is not a Jew.”

This is not a primary definition. Any word, including “American” or “Christian”, for example can be used as a putdown in certain contexts, but the primary meaning of such terms is not pejorative. The Hebrew Bible calls the Jews “goy” meaning “nation.”

Converts to Judaism are usually accepted by Jews like any other Jew (according to their deeds, Judaism is much about about deeds than creeds).

Wikipedia says:

In English, the use of the word goy can be controversial. Like other common (and otherwise innocent) terms, it may be assigned pejoratively to non-Jews. To avoid any perceived offensive connotations, writers may use the English terms “gentile” or “non-Jew”.
In Yiddish, it is the only proper term for gentile and many bilingual English and Yiddish speakers use it dispassionately or even deliberately.

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see My work has been followed by the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (
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