Anything Wrong With A Girl Going For Drinks With A Married Guy?

Men and women who spend a lot of time alone together (or just having private conversations on Facebook or at a bar or a restaurant) are likely to cross the line from just being friends to more.

Therefore, in my view it is a bad idea generally for someone to go for drinks or lunch with a married member of the opposite sex or simply to engage in frequent private conversations with the person.

(I can see many exceptions to my principle. If you are doing a business deal and some socializing is required, OK. If you guys have been friends for a long time, I see nothing wrong with occasionally getting together for drinks or a meal or a FB chat, but it is dangerous to a marriage. The more private time you spend with an attractive member of the opposite sex, the more you endanger your marriage.)

I was asked by a 20-something single female friend about if there was anything wrong with her taking up a married guy’s offer to have drinks.

I said yes. She said, ‘But he has a bad marriage and he’s suffering.”

I said, let him go have drinks with his male friends. She said, he said he didn’t have male friends.

I said, this guy is bad news. Stay far away.

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see My work has been noted in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (
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