Since going back to writing on —- in September of 2002 (because I needed the money), I’ve largely given up on myself.
I just couldn’t see a way that I as an independent writer could earn an honest living.
I faced a choice between honor and doing my own thing and I chose my own thing with a feeling of absolute defeat.
For most of the last six years, this website has been a giant —- you to you-know-who.
I’m a 42-year old child in the way I depend on others to show me the way.
Maybe I’m not dead and buried yet.
Maybe I’m starting a new chapter in my life that doesn’t end with complete annihilation.
My life is not on track. I’m flailing… I’m not married. I’m not on track to be married. I’m not earning a living. I’m not in good standing in my religious community. I’m sick all the time. Blah blah…