This will be my first porn-free Passover in six years, and only my second porn-free Passover since 1995.
I was so far behind with my research in 1996, I was watching hardcore on holy days.
For professional reasons purely.
I remember Peter North hooking up with Davia Ardell.
A rabbi emails:
Glad to see you cut your ties with the porn industry, that will make it easier for you to investigate your spirituality – it’s hard to ride with one foot on one horse & one foot on the other (esp. when the 2 horses are going in opposite directions).
Spirituality & sexuality are closely related, as Swaggart & Friends can tell you. But, out-of-control sexuality is probably the biggest enemy of spiritual connection.
The harder piece to shake may be the cynical attitude, esp. since you’ve seen so much hypocrisy & people not being what they claimed. If our Orthodox Jews had 100% integrity, that would be easy, but we’re as prone to human failings and hypocrisy as any other group. The only thing we claim is that we try to live with wisdom, try to do G-d’s Will, and every once in a while, get to establish a fleeting connection with the Divine (while attempting to achieve Deveikus, a constant and conscious connection with Him). It’s worth fighting that cynicism, even if only in the privacy of your mind, because the fruits of victory are close relationships with yourself, others and G-d.