This week’s parsha is Vayechi (Genesis 47:28-50:26).
Mahla posts to FB: I would like to propose a ridiculous game. This game will be called Torah Talk Bingo. Instead of randomized numbers in the squares, the squares will feature common occurrences that happen during the show. For example, “Luke Looks Bemus…ed at Rabbi’s Rants” or “Luke Provokes Rabbi to Talk About Sex” or “Knock on Islam” or “Smack Talk on a Liberal”. “Chatroom Guest Calls Luke or Rabbi a Douche” and “Luke Fiddles With Webcam Mid-Show” could be another couple of squares.
Any time one of these things happen, players watching and listening at home can mark off whatever inevitability just occurred and the first one to score a BINGO wins. The prize will be determined at a later date.
Alternately, I propose a Torah Talk Drinking Game along the same lines. For example, everyone watching at home would be obligated to take a shot every time hot Persian women get the shout-out, or two shots every time either Luke or the Rabbi mention how impoverished they are. Every time a guest leaves and then re-enters the chat room in a less-than-4-second period, you guessed it, another shot.
Everyone’s sure to be trashed by the end of the night!
Another benefit of the Torah Talk Drinking Game would be that it’d be 100% grade-A kosher. Jews and goyim playing at home alone could take shots of whatever they please. Jews playing with goyish friends could drink whiskey or appropriately …pasteurized wine to avoid transgressing the laws of kashrut. After all you wouldn’t want to drink wine that might have been dedicated to idolatry mere seconds before in celebration of a Torah portion. No doubt that would be doubly blasphemous, even if they didn’t think to include that part in Leviticus.