Scenes from the 85 IQ Life

FICTION:

1.

Bobby Hutchins, 26, sits at the library computer with a paper resume his sister typed and no way to hand it to anyone. The distribution center hires through a portal. The portal wants an account, an email confirmation, and then a questionnaire, sixty items, timed. I prefer tasks that require me to adapt to changing priorities. Strongly agree, agree, neutral, disagree, strongly disagree. Bobby reads it three times. He is a hard worker. Everyone who has ever worked beside him says so. He does not know what the sentence wants from him, and the clock in the corner of the screen is orange now.

The questionnaire is a screen for the screeners: it filters before any human sees an applicant, and what it filters on, beneath the personality language, is the ability to read like a college sophomore under time pressure. Bobby lifts, carries, shows up, and never calls in sick. None of those has a checkbox. At question 41 the session times out. The library computer gives him thirty more minutes a day. He walks home past the distribution center, which has a banner on the fence: NOW HIRING, APPLY ONLINE.

2.

Danny Kowalski, 26 the same spring, cousin to Dave, has the same trouble with portals and never touches one. His uncle Walt runs the counter at a machine shop that does brake work on the side, and Walt tells the owner, “My nephew. He’s slow with paper, I’ll tell you that up front. He’s never late and he doesn’t steal and he’ll do the same thing right five hundred times. You write it down for him once, you got it forever.”

The owner has been burned by quick guys who got bored. He hires Danny at $17 to sweep, stage parts, and break down cores. The interview was Walt’s sentence. The application was blood. This is the oldest hiring technology in the world, the vouch, and it carries information no questionnaire captures: someone who knows this man stakes his own name on him. Bobby has no Walt.

3.

Eighteen months in, Danny is the man the shop cannot run without. The owner learned the manual early: instructions one at a time, written on the whiteboard in order, nothing verbal past two steps, no surprises. Inside that structure Danny is a machine of reliability. Cores broken down and binned the same way every time. Floor swept in the same pattern. He notices what repetition teaches, and repetition has taught him things the quick guys never stayed long enough to learn: which supplier’s boxes come mislabeled, which bolt bins run low before anyone else sees it.

The quick guys come and go, to trade school, to better money. Danny stays, and staying is the asset. When the new kid mocks the whiteboard, the owner takes him out back. “That whiteboard runs this shop. Danny’s done more honest work by nine than you’ll do today.” At the Christmas party Danny gets the same envelope as everyone else and a louder round of applause.

4.

Bobby found work at a chain drugstore through a manager who still took paper. Then the chain changed schedulers. The new system posts shifts through an app, and the shifts float: Tuesday 2 to 10 this week, Thursday 6 a.m. next week, hours released Sunday nights, swaps and confirmations in the app, three taps deep behind a login that expires monthly.

Bobby misses a Thursday he never knew he had. The app had it. The app sent a notification, and the notification looked like the fourteen other notifications his phone sends him a day, and no one at the store thinks to say it out loud anymore because the app says it. Second miss, a write-up. Third, and the district manager, who has never met him, terminates through the same system that scheduled him. His store manager, who liked him, tells him she’s sorry, her hands are tied, the system flags attendance automatically.

The job was stocking shelves. He was good at stocking shelves. What he could not do was administer the job: the floating hours, the expiring login, the silent handoff from human speech to push notification. Linda Gottfredson’s line about modern life fits the drugstore like a work order: the job’s tasks sat inside his range, and the job’s paperwork was the harder job, unposted, unpaid, and the one that fired him.

5.

Money, both men. Danny’s checks deposit into an account his mother helped him open, and the first Sunday of each month he sits at her kitchen table while she pays the bills with him: rent to her, truck insurance, phone. She keeps a folder. When the dealership tried to put him in a loan at 21 percent, he called her from the lot, and she said put the salesman on, and the salesman, hearing the voice on the phone, found a better rate. Danny has a mother the way other men have a lawyer.

Bobby cashes checks at the place with the yellow sign, three percent off the top, because a bank once charged him $34 four times in one week for overdrafts he did not understand and he does not trust banks now. In February, short on rent, he takes a payday loan, $300, and the paper he signs says the finance charge in a box he reads and cannot hold onto. By June the $300 has cost him $510 and is still alive. The industry that wrote that paper knows its customer. It sites its stores by census tract and it prices its product to the sixteenth percentile, and no one calls Bobby from the lot, because there is no one to call.

6.

The state offers Bobby help, on the state’s terms. Medicaid renewal arrives as a ten-page packet: proof of income for a man paid in cash-checked increments, proof of address for a man between sublets, a deadline, and a phone number with a hold time of fifty minutes. He misses a required verification he did not understand was required. Coverage lapses. His tooth abscesses in October and the emergency room, the one door that never closes, treats it for nine hundred times the cost of the dentist he no longer has.

Researchers have a phrase for the packet and the portal and the hold queue: administrative burden. The programs meant for the bottom of the distribution are gated by paperwork calibrated to the middle of it. The state never decided to exclude Bobby. It decided to require forms, and the forms did the excluding, and the savings from everyone who gives up appear in no budget line as a decision anyone made.

Danny’s church runs a different program. It has no name and no forms. When his truck broke, a deacon’s brother fixed it at cost. The congregation knows what Danny is and what he is not, and it has assigned him accordingly: he sets up chairs, he ushers, he is the man who arrives first. Twice a year the pastor says from the front, “This place would not open on Sunday without Danny Kowalski,” and Danny sits up straight. He holds a position in a community, with duties and honor attached. Bobby holds a spot in a queue.

7.

Saturday night, both men, age 30 now. Danny bowls in a league with two guys from the shop and his cousin. He is not good at bowling. Nobody cares. Afterward they eat at the diner and argue about trucks, and Danny sleeps that night in a life that has a place for him shaped to his outline.

Bobby drinks alone. No shift till Tuesday, if the app is right. No one expects him anywhere until then. The unstructured hours are the dangerous country; jobs and families and leagues fence that country off, and Bobby’s fences are down. The drinking is not yet a problem the way it will be a problem. He is a friendly man with no one to be friendly to, holding a phone that mostly sends him notifications from systems that want something.

8.

An IQ of 85 sits at the sixteenth percentile, which means the two men in these scenes stand in for roughly one American in six, some fifty million people. Linda Gottfredson (b. 1947) spent a career on what that number means outside the testing room, and her finding, compressed, is that daily life in a complex society is itself a test, unstandardized, untimed on paper and timed in fact, and it is administered continuously by portals, packets, apps, leases, and loan documents. The economy meanwhile ran its own quiet redesign: it took the jobs built to Danny’s strengths, steady, structured, supervised, physical, and replaced much of that work with jobs whose hidden curriculum is self-administration.

The contrast in these scenes was between two nets. Danny’s family and church operate as his external executive function: they read the fine print, vouch, translate, schedule, and honor him, and inside that structure he is a success by any standard that matters, a reliable man, employed twelve years, loved. Bobby, the same man by every measure a psychologist would record, falls through the world alone, and the world bills him for it at the check-cashing rate. Policy debates about the bottom of the distribution argue training and benefits. The scenes argue something prior. What the sixteenth percentile needs most is what Danny has and no program has yet learned to issue: an uncle, a whiteboard, a mother with a folder, and a congregation that says his name from the front.

About Luke Ford

I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (Alexander90210.com).
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