She emails:
I would like to pose a question to you….. my grammar sucks and I have heard that might make you crazy but deal with it. I am aware of your book Rebel without a shul. Why do you so desperately want a shul when from what I hear Rabbi’s aren’t any better than someone exploring, to make a living, the porn industry.
Frankly, why would you care that immoral men don’t accept your writings. You said yourself, "I needed to make money and thought, what is interesting that no one knows about, that I can write about."
I haven’t read your book but am acutely aware of your problem, me being a shiksah, I am shunned constantly while just walking along the street by these men in fur hats. I will be running or walking and my obvious lack of religion/clothing will make them cross the street.
I am judged by a look. We might share a court yard and they will listen to my machine to get my phone number and call me on Sat to tell me they can hear my TV and I need to turn it off and then will ask me to press the elevator button or open their refrigerator promising we will have sherry someday. Of course that never happens.
Meanwhile their new born, is placed on the floor by the sliding doors to sleep. I have a friend whom has all kinds of married Rabbi friends one who inflicted her with his sex addiction. Of course he was "going to get a separation" someday I am sure his wife will leave but meanwhile, my friend who grapples with this conundrum, goes to her long time Rabbi friend who happens to be married with 13 children for advice. He then inflicts her with disgusting sexual innuendo of his own.
Ok, I was going to write verbatim what he wrote in the 9 text messages but she thinks since, he is a Rabbi, he will speak of her in the community. Frankly, I find it reprehensible. In my writing this, I wonder, why would you want a home like this and my real intention is to expose yet again the unsavory power of religion.
Organized religion is a way to control the masses and it was invented to control man’s will to power. Give man a moral sounding board but has it? Or has it allowed men of religious power to influence their shul members without having to abstain from the very laws that we are all supposed to abide by. Who needs that shit? Do unto others as you would have others do unto you! I think god helps those who helps themselves and if your intention is to prey on the people who look up to you, I don’t have words to express my disappointment.
But I would love to see a couple of Rabbi’s in stilettos to arouse me. Or a kosher Rabbi with a predilection for sexual deviance! But Luke maybe, you can explain this to me since you seem to be THE BAD GUY! I think you are more a moral leader than most stories I have heard about Rabbi’s.
I realize this isn’t a competition but at least you don’t pretend to be a rabbi and you don’t take advantage of impressionable congregates that look up to you! But you are the bad guy looking for redemption? Good luck! Hmm, how do I end this? JUDGE NOT LEST YE BE JUDGED. I have no names and I hate coffee!
The four synagogues I was booted from — the rabbis were good guys. They were not sexual predators. About the same percentage of rabbis are sexual predators as any other profession… Overall, though, I have had good experiences with most rabbis. I like Orthodox Judaism and most of my friends are Orthodox.
Shiksa responds: "Why do you continually seek the approval of people who stand in judgement of how you have earned a living. When they themselves have not been upstanding in your community. Who knows if those Rabbi’s aren’t sexual predators? I am sure the woman I speak of thought she knew her Rabbi’s too!"
Because I admire some of such people. I want approval from those I respect.
I no longer write on porn so this is no longer an issue for me.
The rabbis who ejected me, to the best of my knowledge, are good people. I respect them…
I guess one answer to your question is psychological. I’m still seeking the approval of my strict father figure while simultaneously making rebellious choices that eliminate any chance for approval so that I will feel conflicted and unhappy and endless replay my childhood seeking healing from those early traumas.
The shiksa responds: "Why do your respect them? Why do you think they are better than you? Faith comes from within. You have to trust yourself expect good to come but not because you reformed. Give your parents a break they weren’t given a book about BEING A GOOD PARENT when you were born. They did the best they could now, your life is up to you. No one sets out to be the BAD GUY your parents weren’t trying to ruin you. Dennis Prager won’t make or break you either. Enjoy your life move toward happiness DANCE, GET DRUNK AND HAVE FUN. Your life might change! Get out of your comfort zone and maybe, get away from the people and places you know to explore the fun of life, if you fear judgement! On your death bed won’t you regret not doing everything life has to offer?"
I only respect those who are finer than I am… I don’t respect all Orthodox Jews or rabbis as better than me.
I don’t care about faith.
I dont castigate my parents.
If I lived in such fear of judgment, I couldn’t write as openly as I do.
