Your Top 12 Defense Mechanisms

When Fox News called Arizona for Joe Biden at 8:20 PM CA time on election night, it was clear that Joe Biden was going to become the next president of the United States. However, it took me about four more days to accept that reality. Why so long? Because I was denying reality.

The weekend after the election, I read some books on voter fraud. The best two were Election Meltdown: Dirty Tricks, Distrust, and the Threat to American Democracy by Richard Hasen (published in February 2020) and The Myth of Voter Fraud by Lorraine C. Minnite (published in 2010). After reading these books, I realized that Republicans had been complaining about voter fraud since the Motor Voter Law of 1993 but that they never bothered to present strong evidence that it led to massive voter fraud. Hence, I immediately became skeptical when Republicans complained that massive voter fraud cost them the presidency in the 2020 election. So when I heard new claims of massive voter fraud, I wanted to see evidence and I was never impressed by what I saw, and I was similarly not impressed by pundits who proclaimed voter fraud in 2020 was substantial when they had no compelling evidence. I then deepened my contempt for every pundit who makes his living talking about things he knows little about, and I was re-affirmed in my preference for the scholarship of those who devote much of their adult life to certain specialties.

LCSW Kati Morton in this 2019 video says: “A defense mechanism is an unconscious psychological response that prevents us from feeling any anxiety or upset that can arise from difficult or harmful stimuli. Research shows us that these defenses happen when our amygdala is firing. Remember our amygdala, it’s that bean-shaped part of our inner brain that acts as our fire alarm and aids us in fight, flight, and freeze. So when we feel in danger, our defense mechanisms come to our aid! Even if the threat is something we are imagining.
In a way, our defense mechanisms keep us safe and happy because they prevent us from having to deal with anything that has the potential to be upsetting. But as I am sure you can see, life cannot be completely free from anxiety or upset. Life comes with its ups and downs, and we can’t just avoid everything and think it’s going to be okay. That’s why these defense mechanisms quickly become unhealthy coping skills, that after keeping us safe that one time, now just hold us back, hurt our relationships, and isolate us from our loved ones.”

So our defense mechanisms shield us, at least temporarily, from anything that might upset us such as a Joe Biden victory. I don’t want to avoid reality because these mechanisms are not helping me in the long-term. They isolate me and make me less effective. Most everything, it seems, that immediately makes one feel better is bad for you.

Mechanism 1: Denial. We refuse to acknowledge that something has happened. This is particularly common among addicts. People like to deny reality so that they can avoid doing something about it.

2: Displacement. When we redirect our upset on to another person.
3. Intellectualization. Instead of dealing with something difficult, we focus on fixing a problem or analyzing a problem instead of giving ourselves the time to feel.
4. Repression. When we take difficult feelings and push them into our subconscious. They become a black hole. This often happens as a result of trauma. This is why we have flashbacks and body memories later in life.
5. Projection. When we place our emotions or thoughts on to somebody else. We might even become upset at others when nothing is actually happening.
6. Over-compensation. When we over-compensate in one part of our life to make up for lack in another area instead of being OK with not being wonderful at everything.
7. Regression. Reverting to childhood. Name-calling and throwing tantrums.
8. Reaction formation. When we act in contrast to how we feel.
9. Rationalization. We come up with excuses. We explain away our bad behavior.
10. Sublimation. When we channel anything upsetting into something more acceptable.
11. Dissociation. When our situation becomes too much to deal with and so we either disconnect from ourselves (depersonalization) or from reality (derealization).
12. Passive aggression.

I notice a lot of my friends on the right are declaring that they are becoming non-political and yet they are still active on social media, they still listen to talk radio and watch the news and retain a passionate interest in politics. In other words, they’re fooling themselves about reality and about themselves to cope.

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see Amazon.com). My work has been covered in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and on 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (Alexander90210.com).
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