"What if I would cut off all my hair if you didn’t cut off your beard," she says.
They lie on the bed.
She knew how much he loved her long hair. Her body was his weakness. When people ask her about he feels about her lack of religiosity, she always says, "He’s more interested right now in my body than my mind."
"Hmm," he says.
"Let me try positive reinforcement," she says. "What would I have to do to get you to cut off your beard? How many ****** would I have to ******* for you to cut off your beard?"
"Hmm," he says. "I’ve often thought about this. I know you don’t like the beard. I think we have a partnership and should make these types of decisions together."
"I know your identity is wrapped up in your bed," she says.
"It’s like this," he says. "A Jew only has to give up his life rather than disobey Jewish law for three things — sexual immorality, idolatry and murder. But in tough times, the rabbis have ruled that Jews should give up their lives rather than violate any law. I feel like we’re in tough times. We have not achieved a modus vivendi about Judaism. You hate it. I love it. I try to be Orthodox. You’re passionately secular.
"If we were at peace about Judaism, then it would not be a big deal for me to cut off my beard if it would make you happy, but we’re at war over Judaism, so I can’t surrender my Golan Heights right off."
"I don’t want you to cut off your beard," she says. "I don’t want to change you."
"I have a nightmare," he says, "that I cut off my beard and you suddenly lose your attraction for me.
"I’m like your shaggy dog. A shaggy dog’s shaggy hair doesn’t look good, but when you come to love the dog, you come to love the shaggy hair that comes with the dog and you don’t want to shave him. So come here and love your shaggy dog."
