Thrashing Out Your Fantasies With Doreen Seidler-Feller

Here are my favorite sections of the Jewish Journal report on LimmudLA:

…for three days and nights of Jews doing Jewish right.

…But more than what you learn, LimmudLA is about with whom you learn: It offers a chance for Jews of various and often opposing backgrounds to study, eat or just sit together and in the process learn about one another and about things they might never have known could move them.

…If last year’s inaugural LimmudLA was characterized by a wild intensity, this year offered a more relaxed mania…

…In sessions we discussed deep — or just interesting — matters: blues music, King Solomon’s seven levels of laziness, Jewish meditation, but only rarely did follow-up conversations in the hallway produce much more.

…All due credit goes to sex therapist Doreen Seidler-Feller, who was able to facilitate several provocative and highly unusual discussions about sex that included everyone from sexually active teenagers to long-married Orthodox couples, who might believe open dialogue about sex — especially for the unmarried — is at odds with their core value of modesty.

The tension between the two poles of modesty and reality made sex a popular topic at LimmudLA. Sessions addressed boring sex, Shabbat sex, sexual repression and the influence of testosterone.

Seidler-Feller took great pains to create an atmosphere of comfort where people could thrash out their fantasies and ask intimate questions…

…Two observant Jews with the chutzpah to aim to satisfy both their ambition and their religious commitment shared their stories at LimmudLA.

…Projecting an image of femininity can be troublesome, too — how a woman looks sometimes overshadows how she performs. Working in the trenches, the newest generation is determined to change the paradigm and normalize femininity in the rabbinate.

And they are doing so with uncommon humility.

…Deep text studies and lots of grappling with God and faith were prevalent in the program.

How is such writing produced? By making your primary aim not to offend. This leads to lots of writing in the passive voice employing the jargon and outlook of the organizers. Contrast this with Danielle Berrin’s subversive cover story on Brett Ratner (having months rather than hours to work on a piece also helps).

And then there’s this from Jewlicious:

LimmudLA was a terrific success and the organizers and their sponsors should be thanked again and again. LA brought out its best and brightest for this weekend retreat. The program was alive, the vibe good, and the entertainment first rate. Sunday’s concert featured a variety of Jewish performers for a PBS style showcase. It was a unique feat, created by Robbie Helperin. Kudos to Linda Fife & Shep Rosenman, conference co-chairs, & Ruthie Rotenberg, Executive Director of LimmudLA, and all the dozens of volunteers.

I’d love to see what Borat would at LimmudLA. “Nice! High Five! Sexy Time! Her, not so much.”

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see Amazon.com). My work has been covered in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and on 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (Alexander90210.com).
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