Congruence With Orthodoxy

Joe emails:

As I have told you for a long time, Orthodox Judaism is for married couples, preferably where the male carries a spare tire and the woman carries two.

Going to shul and having a place where your kids can wild with other kids so you can take a snooze or pay attention during the rabbi’s speech makes the ritual worth it. Seeing your children say the four questions makes it worth it. Having your children know the rules of hanuka makes it worth it. Orthodox people with children in a community are living in congruence.

Single people in their 40s, are just not being congruent in being Orthodox. I mean, it is fine and I love single people, but, as a single person, you have needs that are really not met by Orthodoxy. You are not in congruence. And you can only be incongruent for so long, which I estimate at just short of your entire lifespan, and when you think about it, do you want to be here in twenty years having to deprive yourself but get to learn daf yomi, or do you want to live congruently, humming some mantra and in a milieu in which your needs are addressed.

I notice that probably no orthodox shul in L.A. sponsors an official singles group. Sure, singles can go to daf yomi and shiurs and come to shul, but it lacks congruence at some point.

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see My work has been followed by the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (
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