From the Chateau: It’s a common admonition from pickup artists that you should leave a girl better than you found her. I suppose mainstream PUAs (well, as mainstream as PUA gurus can get) say this to soften the perception that game is horribly cynical and manipulative. While they are right to claim that game is a blessing to women in much the same way that women exercising to stay sexy and slender is a blessing to men, they are veering into hyperbole to suggest that leaving a girl after you have gamed her into however many nights of sweaty sex is going to make her a better person.
Let’s examine the suppositions behind this smooth but empty incantation. Assume the average pickup artist meets a girl he likes and they date (read: screw) for a few months. Because he is a guy who knows game, she really digs him. At this three-month critical juncture, he has a few options before him: he can choose to stick it out for longer in monogamous isolation chamber hell bliss, he can lie about seeing other girls, he can somehow convince her to be part of his harem, or he can dump her to chase fresh tail. That last choice is what we’re interested in. What would be the reasons a man would leave a girl he is banging?
– he found a hotter girl
– the full extent of her horrid personality came to light
– she gained weight or suffered facial disfigurement from an accident or attack (hey, it’s a cruel world)
– he is bursting with ball juice and can’t go more than three months without sampling new pussy
– a hotter ex came back into his life
– he cheated and decided leaving her was preferable to staying with her in penance prison, offering his manly dignity as sacrificial lamb
– he just got plain tired of banging her and needed his single life back
– he moved far away, or she moved far away
– she started pressing him to move the relationship forward
– he caught her cheating
There are, I’m sure, other reasons why a man would leave a chick, but I think I’ve hit upon the most common ones. Now ask yourself this simple question: under any of the above dumping scenarios where the man has dumped a girl who really liked him (excluding the scenario where he caught her cheating), do you honestly believe the girl is going to feel better about herself afterwards? Happier? More content with life? Filled with joy and whimsy? Will she be a BETTER PERSON, whatever the fuck that means?
The answer is contained in the absurdity of the question. Of course, she won’t be happy. I doubt she’ll be much of a better person, either. Most girls who have torrid flings with alphas might learn what kind of player warning signs to watch for, but their hearts will ache for one more of his touches, and they won’t be able to bond very well with any future men who don’t rise to the standards set by her alpha ex.
When women get dumped by men they love, they get hurt. Ask any woman recently dumped by an alpha boyfriend, and you will most assuredly not hear a melodious note of happiness in her voice. What you will hear is pain, sorrow, regret, an inability to focus on anything, and even a sense of guilt (“I nagged him too much!”). There will be tears, anger and spite. What there won’t be is some Anthony Robbins-like revelation of self improvement.
