I went to UCLA. I think we called it “United Caucasians Lost Among Asians.”
Chaim Amalek emails: “There are other currents running beneath this rant, namely, the war between the White Bimbo and the Yellowoman for the affections and wealth of the White Man.”
COEDMagazine.com reports: “Turns out Allie’s also a bikini model. Since her ModelMayhem, Facebook, Twitter, and every other page affiliated with her has been pulled down, we managed to scoop up a library’s worth of her modeling photos. How should UCLA handle this? Can YOU handle this?”
Report: Meet Alexandra Wallace. She’s a UCLA political science student with something on her mind. She’s got a problem with Asians — specifically, the “hordes” of Asians (and their families) in her apartment complex and the Asians answering their phones in “ching chong ling long ting tong” at the library. The original video has been taken down, but lots of cloned videos have been re-posted. You must see it for yourself:
Here’s a transcript of the rant:
Okay, so here at UCLA it’s finals week.
So we know that I’m not the most politically correct person so don’t take this offensively. I don’t mean it toward any of my friends I mean it toward random people that I don’t even know in the library. So, you guys are not the problem.
The problem is these hordes of Asian people that UCLA accepts into our school every single year, which is fine. But if you’re going to come to UCLA then use American manners.
So it used to really bug me but it doesn’t bother me anymore the fact that all the Asian people that live in all the apartments around me — their moms and their brothers and their sisters and their grandmas and their grandpas and their cousins and everybody that they know that they’ve brought along from Asia with them – comes here on the weekends to do their laundry, buy their groceries and cook their food for the week. It’s seriously, without fail. You will always see old Asian people running around this apartment complex every weekend. That’s what they do. They don’t teach their kids to fend for themselves. You know what they don’t also teach them, is their manners.
Which brings me to my next point. Hi, in America we do not talk on our cell phones in the library. I swear every five minutes I will be — okay, not five minutes, say like fifteen minutes — I’ll be in like deep into my studying, into my political science theories and arguments and all that stuff, getting it all down, like typing away furiously, blah blah, blah, and then all of a sudden when I’m about to like reach an epiphany… Over here from somewhere, “Ooooh Ching Chong Ling Long Ting Tong, Ooohhhhh.”
Are you freaking kidding me? In the middle of finals week? So being the polite, nice American girl that my momma raised me to be, I kinda just gave him what anybody else would do that kinda like, [puts finger up to lips in a “shh” motion]. “You know it’s a library, like, we’re trying to study, thanks!” And then it’s the same thing five minutes later. But it’s somebody else, you know — I swear they’re going through their whole families, just checking on everybody from the tsunami thing. I mean I know, okay, that sounds horrible like I feel bad for all the people affected by the tsunami, but if you’re gonna go call your address book like you might as well go outside because if something is wrong you might really freak out if you’re in the library and everybody’s quiet like you seriously should go outside if you’re gonna do that.
So, thanks for listening, that was my rant. I just — even if you’re not Asian you really shouldn’t be on your cell phone in the library but I’ve just never seen that happen before so thank you for listening and have a nice day.
Steven Lu posts to the FB of the UCLA chancellor: Dear Chancellor,
What Ms. Wallace posted was very offensive and, as an Asian-American, very much upset me. In fact, I am so upset that I believe she should be punished by expulsion, public humiliation, and maybe even solitary confinement at a high security prison. You see, apart from the inevitably irreparable damages she’ll sustain from other angry Asian-Americans such as myself, I feel she deserves even more punishment from the UCLA administration. After all, there’s nothing worse for UCLA’s image than one student’s posting her opinion on the Internet–not even the hordes of people posting her contact information and planning to harass her during her final exams. Again, freedom of speech is not a right, especially for college students. Ms. Wallace should burn in hell for her actions and I will not rest or begin studying for finals until justice is had.
