Ben Plonie writes on the Jewish Journal forum:
He was definitely inappropriate and the clue may be in his statement ""I want you to understand, just for a moment, I have never had another job". It’s not just a job, it’s his own candy store, and like many professionals who have nobody to give them proper feedback; lawyers, judges, surgeons etc. he has aged in an idiosyncratic way. The best analogy I could give you would be Imus.
Understanding what we are seeing is a beginning but not a justification. Times, society and the Jewish world have changed in the 37 years of the Rabbi’s work, and he has not changed with it. While the rules he goes by cannot be changed, his perception and his approach should have. There are dozens and hundreds in the new generation with a heightened sensitivity for the current realities.
At the unquoted end of your article, the woman had gotten in touch with another Orthodox rabbi and was considering an Orthodox conversion. Rabbi Schwartz should either have been that rabbi or (if that is not his thing) have been the one to refer her to him.
Marlene Fineberg writes:
When Schwartzie wrote me this insane, bizarre, scathing emails, I initially wrote to many Orthodox rabbis in the LA area, because I had lived in LA briefly a long time ago…and they all chose to either not reply to my letter, or to say they didn’t want to get involved. I was disgusted with their unified cowardice and still am. I had really respected these rabbis immensely.
So then I wrote to the Jewish Journal, and due to the fact that they needed to do research, (and whatever other reasons), it took all this time for them to finally write this article. Thank you for writing it, Julie Fax.
I had already forgotten about the whole incident by this time. At the time, I was very, very angry, because I had spent a considerable sum of money coming to LA for Passover…flight, hotel, renting a car, etc.
Instead of him being appreciative and welcoming that I had traveled and spent a good deal of my money to be there…that was the response I received.
Also, I met several, nice, single women that night, and I emailed them and told them about the incident. They said they were going to say something about it, but most likely didn’t.People generally say they’re going to do something about a situation but most of the time don’t follow through. (Sorry to be so cynical).
Thank you to Julie Fax, again, for FOLLOWING THROUGH, (even though it is her job, of course, but thank you anyway).
The most disturbing aspect of that bizarre experience to me was that a man would NEVER have been treated that way no matter what.
I did just write a book of poetry and you can find it on Amazon.com or on Outskirtspress.com, under "Elephants, Alligators, Umbrellas: A BOOK OF POEMS FOR A FAST-PACED WORLD."
You are right, Ben Plonie. He didn’t change with the times, which is mandatory for everyone, even if you are fortunate enough to be a prima donna like "Schwartzie." The name ‘Schwartzie’ even sounds like he never grew up, if you ask me.
I’m not one generally to talk about others disparagingly. I generally enjoy (like most people) talking about myself most of all, so it’s not like I’m vicious or vindictive, but I was tired of men getting away with so so so very much more in our society than women ever get away with, so I wrote to everyone about this incident. Like I said, however, the rabbis "didn’t want to get involved," to their discredit, as far I’m concerned.
I have to say, before I retire for the evening and move on from this unfortunate, unhappy experience…which was three years ago already!…
Rabbi Schwartz and I, ironically, are really on the same team. I’m often dismayed and distraught not only by the grotesque events of the Holocaust, but also at the way Jewish women are continually overlooked for marriage in favor of non-Jewish women.
However, Rabbi Schwartz is targeting the wrong people in this scenario: the women. I would have liked nothing more in this world than to have married a nice, Jewish man. Since I was lucky enough to have been born not bad looking and not stupid, and from a nice family and with a cultured background and a love of learning, etc., etc…I thought that having a nice, Jewish family would not only be possible but probable.
Unfortunately, since the Jewish men, (who many times weren’t even as intelligent as I), passed on me and often did prefer a non-Jew, I did marry a non-Jew, (not the one I brought to the Seder), but a brief marriage years before.
Rabbi Schwartz should be holding classes to re-educate the slightly "warped" minds of the Jewish men, whereby they don’t appreciate a woman for her mind and her soul, and often just want a "hot" woman on their arm, and forsake deeper goals and values.
I feel sorry for the young, Jewish women in LA, and hope they fare better than I. I moved out of LA a long, long time ago since it was not condusive to me feeling appreciated for who I am.
The Orthodox want someone Orthodox; the secular want someone "hot" and successful; the Israelis…I dated them, and I think they just want a mirror so they can fall in love with themselves, from what I could see…
Meanwhile, the wonderful, unique, sacred essence of so many women like myself, was utterly passed over. It is a very sad state that I still don’t have the family I always wanted. I have three dogs and two cats, and they are beautiful and sweet beyond repair. Anyone who knows me and sees them at the dog park everyday with me, here in Tucson, knows what an amazing mother I would have made if the Jewish men in LA had noticed I have a spark of the Divine within me.
