I fell in love with Judaism because Dennis Prager and Joseph Telushkin presented it to me (through their writings and lectures and media appearances) as a step-by-step system for making a better world.
They said Judaism embodied ethical monotheism — the belief that there is one God whose primary demand of people is ethical behavior.
Dennis and Joseph complain that ritual observance, rather than ethical behavior, has become the measure of a Jew’s religiosity. If a Jew keeps the Sabbath and the kosher laws, then he is religious, even if he cheats in business.
I still love Dennis and Joseph and ethical monotheism but my views on these topics have become more nuanced.
For one thing, the primary reason that ritual observance is usually taken as the measure of religiosity is because ritual observance is easily measured while ethical behavior is not.
In my first few years of Judaic obsession, I thought one could sort through one’s life for unethical behavior and systematically root it out.
While this approach may work to varying degrees with various people, the perpetuation of goodness requires much more, including community.
Ethics are not enough to hold a group together. Rituals bind people together. For instance, Orthodox shuls tend to be much tighter knit because Orthodox Jews are not allowed to drive on the Sabbath (and festivals) and thus must live within walking distance of the shul (and each other).
Frequently, there’s nothing in common between what looks right and what does right.
For instance, in the summer of 1995, I wanted to write a book on how to be a good person (based upon Dennis Prager’s teachings). When Prager asked me to hold off on that project, I decided to write a history of porn instead.
That would seem to be major demerits to me.
But in the course of researching my book, I exposed somebody who was transmitting HIV to a lot of people (and other stories of similar importance). For those who I saved from HIV, it’s a good thing I devoted my skills to investigating porn rather than goodness.
I’m reading Rabbi Telushkin’s new book A Code of Jewish Ethics: Volume 1: You Shall Be Holy in the light of a clash (Rabbi Telushkin and company made a scorched earth attack on those of us who’d reported accurately on the predatory behavior of Rabbi Marc Gafni) we had a couple of years ago.
Based on his public statements (or lack of them), Telushkin has learned nothing from his prodigious efforts on behalf of a sexual predator (Rabbi Gafni carried Telushkin’s letter with him in a briefcase wherever he went).
In a prominent letter Rabbi Telushkin (along with Saul Berman, Dr. Stephen Marmer and ) sent out in early January 2005, he wrote: “Luke Ford is a discredited malicious gossip columnist for the pornography industry.”
Hmm. In 2003, when 60 Minutes sought out a critic of the porn industry, they did not turn to Rabbi Telushkin or any clergy. They turned to me.
When Beth Jacob’s Rabbi Steven Weil was asked about my report on Aaron Biston’s claim that Rabbi Weil slapped him and cursed him in front of his daughter in the process of throwing Biston out of shul, Rabbi Weil’s response was that I was a pornographer.
I’m not arguing that that is an unethical response. A good argument can be made that that is the best response.
I’m reading chapter five of Rabbi Telushkin’s book about judging people fairly. He trots out the familiar injunctions about judging with empathy.
I studied these same texts with religious Jews for years and I don’t know if our study made any difference in our behavior. When I was kicked out of a shul, nobody (with a couple of exceptions) made any effort to get my side of things (or even to stay in touch — I’m not arguing that they should’ve acted differently, I am just observing about the facts on the ground).
“Jews invented shunning,” says my pornographer friend James DiGiorgio.
I’m not arguing that Jews or anybody shouldn’t shun gross sinners such as myself. I am simply musing on Judaic admonitions to judge with empathy and how such admonitions are carried out (if at all).
I’m thinking about what happened to Rabbi Juda Mintz. His shul computer was found to have two pictures of child pornography on it. I suspect he did not even seek out such material. Just in the course of cruising the web looking for porn, he accumulated those two criminal pics on his harddrive. For that sin (there’s no evidence he harmed any child or ever acted like a predator on anybody), he lost almost all his friends and family.
You can have all the pious admonitions you want about judging people with empathy, and I don’t think the very persons who study such admonitions and pay lip service to them will act any differently (when the sinner they are called upon to judge is now judged by their peers to be outside their community).
A lot of people who led pious lives by going to seminary and embracing a heavily religious lifestyle would probably have done far more good in the world if they had pursued money and fame instead (by creating valuable products and services and paying taxes on their earnings).
Some of us are so screwed up that when we take on a lofty cause such as ethical monotheism, we only bring disrepute to it, no matter how hard we study the sacred texts and try to implement them.
