I Get Mail

* I resolved to return to 12-step today, a much-needed development I have been mulling for several months. (I used to attend AA but gave up giving up.) I have a lot in common with many in the alt-right, despite being a patrilineal Jew. My social and financial capital is extremely limited; I have spent many years procrastinating and avoiding; and I was already marginalised and interested in fringe ideas from the outset. You are right to emphasise the dangers of the red pill: in some ways the alt-right made me even more marginalised and, coupled with a fondness for alcohol, I put myself in a few situations where my readiness to talk about our ideas nearly got me in trouble. My brother, whom I previously got on very well with, has all but disowned me (and I have barely even spoken about the alt-right with him. He can simply sense a dangerous change.)

In other ways, however, the alt-right has been positive. For the first time ever I feel in touch with reality; I think my delusions are fewer; I have been forced to face up to the future and my culpability in failing to build an adequate life for myself. I began saving money for the first time, and while my professional life is still very unsatisfying, I am more positive about my ability to effect some change. Whether I will ever get there I don’t know but I have at least accepted I have a duty to try. I haven’t wanted to try before, not really. Life was too much of a struggle – I preferred dreaming/drinking.

I found the recent stream (‘Under Earning’) highly enjoyable. It was notable that the presence of the older man triggered many under-earning responses in the young Australian. He became needlessly confrontational in a way that illustrated the point you were making. I don’t think he was aware of that though. Rodney, to his credit, handled him very well.

About Luke Ford

I've written five books (see Amazon.com). My work has been followed by the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and 60 Minutes. I teach Alexander Technique in Beverly Hills (Alexander90210.com).
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