Emasculation

I sense that much of the audience for talk radio and right-wing punditry feels emasculated. The world has changed and they don’t know how to cope. The more successful part of the audience also sees that the world has changed, but they’re not just coping, they’re thriving.

I can’t think of any right-wing pundit who is not hysterical. The left-wing pundits may be all hysterics too, I just don’t pay them as much mind.

A dominant tone on talk radio and right-wing punditry is male hysteria about a changing world. May 5, 2020, Dennis Prager wrote this hysterical column:

The idea that the worldwide lockdown of virtually every country other than Sweden may have been an enormous mistake strikes many — including world leaders; most scientists, especially health officials, doctors and epidemiologists; those who work in major news media; opinion writers in those media; and the hundreds of millions, if not billions, of people who put their faith in these people — as so preposterous as to be immoral. Timothy Egan of The New York Times described Republicans who wish to enable their states to open up as “the party of death.”

That’s the way it is today on planet Earth, where deceit, cowardice and immaturity now dominate almost all societies because the elites are deceitful, cowardly and immature.

But for those open to reading thoughts they may differ with, here is the case for why the worldwide lockdown is not only a mistake but also, possibly, the worst mistake the world has ever made…

The forcible prevention of Americans from doing anything except what politicians deem “essential” has led to the worst economy in American history since the Great Depression of the 1930s. It is panic and hysteria, not the coronavirus, that created this catastrophe. And the consequences in much of the world will be more horrible than in America.

The United Nations World Food Programme, or the WFP, states that by the end of the year, more than 260 million people will face starvation — double last year’s figures. According to WFP director David Beasley on April 21: “We could be looking at famine in about three dozen countries. … There is also a real danger that more people could potentially die from the economic impact of COVID-19 than from the virus itself” (italics added).

That would be enough to characterize the worldwide lockdown as a deathly error. But there is much more. If global GDP declines by 5%, another 147 million people could be plunged into extreme poverty, according to the International Food Policy Research Institute.

Foreign Policy magazine reports that, according to the International Monetary Fund, the global economy will shrink by 3% in 2020, marking the biggest downturn since the Great Depression, and the U.S., the eurozone and Japan will contract by 5.9%, 7.5% and 5.2%, respectively. Meanwhile, across South Asia, as of a month ago, tens of millions were already “struggling to put food on the table.” Again, all because of the lockdowns, not the virus.

In one particularly incomprehensible act, the government of India, a poor country of 1.3 billion people, locked down its people. As Quartz India reported on April 22, “Coronavirus has killed only around 700 Indians … a small number still compared to the 450,000 TB and 10,000-odd malaria deaths recorded every year.”

One of the thousands of unpaid garment workers protesting the lockdown in Bangladesh understands the situation better than almost any health official in the world: “We are starving. If we don’t have food in our stomach, what’s the use of observing this lockdown?” But concern for that Bangladeshi worker among the world’s elites seems nonexistent.

The lockdown is “possibly even more catastrophic (than the virus) in its outcome: the collapse of global food-supply systems and widespread human starvation” (italics added). That was published in the left-wing The Nation, which, nevertheless, enthusiastically supports lockdowns. But the American left cares as much about the millions of non-Americans reduced to hunger and starvation because of the lockdown as it does about the people of upstate New York who have no incomes, despite the minuscule number of coronavirus deaths there. Or about the citizens of Oregon, whose governor has just announced the state will remain locked down until July 6. As of this writing, a total of 109 people have died of the coronavirus in Oregon.

When you enrage, you engage. That’s the winning formula for talk radio. I’m not aware of any viable business model for non-hysterical punditry (except for a few elite Substacks and Steve Sailer).

Michael Hiltzik writes May 19, 2021 for the Los Angeles Times:

The published data point to two related conclusions: First, lockdowns played a significant role in reducing infection rates. Second, they had a very modest role in producing economic damage. Conversely, lifting lockdowns has done very little to spur economic resurgence.

Some of the evidence for both propositions has been expertly compiled by Noah Smith, a former finance professor now writing economic commentary for Bloomberg…

A team of UCLA researchers, in a paper first published in May 2020 and updated later, found that “likely Trump voters” reduced their movements by 9% following a local stay-at-home order, “compared to a 21% reduction among their Clinton-voting neighbors, who face similar exposure risks and identical government orders.”

Hostility to social measures short of a lockdown, such as social distancing and masks, bears the same partisan coloration.

It makes sense, therefore to examine the evidence — or rather, gather ammunition for the coming debate.

Numerous studies from across the world have found that lockdowns succeeded in suppressing transmission rates. An Italian team found that lockdowns start to reduce the number of COVID infections about 10 days after they start, and keep reducing the case rate for as long as 20 days following initiation.

French researchers, in a paper published in January, compared the experience in countries that imposed stay-at-home orders early in the pandemic and lifted the restrictions gradually — New Zealand, France, Spain, Germany, the Netherlands, Italy and Britain— to that of Sweden, which imposed no lockdown, and the U.S., which had (and still has) a patchwork of state policies often involving late orders followed by abrupt and premature lifting.

The first group saw rapid reductions in infections and a rapid economic recovery, compared to the second. “Early-onset lockdown with gradual deconfinement allowed shortening the SARS-CoV-2 epidemic and reducing contaminations,” the researchers concluded. “Lockdown should be considered as an effective public health intervention to halt epidemic progression.”

The UCLA researchers, meanwhile, estimated that reductions in movement resulting from stay-at-home orders reduced transmission in the hardest-hit communities, such as Seattle, New York, San Francisco and Los Angeles by 50% or more.

All these findings point to savings of millions of lives globally. None of it is especially surprising. Compliance with stay-at-home orders meant reducing one’s exposure to strangers whose viral conditions were unknown. That was especially crucial in locations where COVID was raging and therefore the prospect of coming into close contact with an infected individual was relatively high.

That leaves the economic question. Critics of lockdowns typically advocate balancing the public health gains from stay-at-home orders against the economic losses from keeping bars, restaurants, hair salons, and other small businesses closed. They argue, as has DeSantis and other red-state governors such as Greg Abbott of Texas, that concerns about the latter should take primacy over the benefits of the former.

The problem with this argument is that there’s very little evidence that lockdowns themselves damaged local economies more than individual behavior that would have happened anyway, lockdowns or not. Nor is there much evidence that lifting lockdowns produced a faster recovery.

Those who have studied the course of the pandemic in the U.S. and Europe understand why the lockdowns have less economic impact than one might expect. The reason is that people made their own choices to stay at home or to patronize only businesses where they felt relatively safe.

As Austan Goolsbee and Chad Syversen of the University of Chicago said of their study of the economic slump during the pandemic, “The vast majority of the decline was due to consumers choosing of their own volition to avoid commercial activity.”

Noah Smith writes May 16, 2021:

There is copious evidence that lockdowns reduced transmission of the coronavirus. Some types of social distancing restrictions are more effective than others, and some sub-populations benefit more than others, but overall, lockdowns did limit the spread and saved lives.

That’s hardly a surprising result. The bigger question is, what did lockdown do to the economy? Most people make the natural assumption that lockdown hurts the economy — if you ban people from going out to restaurants, that stops people from spending money on restaurants, right? Obviously. Many economists made this assumption when they tried to model pandemic policy. In fact, some people go so far as to blame all the economic costs of the pandemic on lockdowns…

The fact is, even without lockdowns, plenty of people will avoid restaurants and other crowded spaces during a pandemic simply out of fear of catching the virus. And that will hurt the economy.

And lo and behold, when we look at evidence, we find that lockdowns accounted for only a small percent of the economic slowdown. For example, economists Austan Goolsbee and Chad Syverson looked at the state border between Illinois and Iowa. On the Illinois side, the towns issued stay-at-home orders, whereas on the Iowa side they did not. And guess what — economic activity fell almost as much on the Iowa side as on the Illinois side!

This is very similar to the results of a comparison of Sweden and Denmark. Denmark locked down and saw its economic activity decline by 29%; Sweden chose not to lock down, and saw its economic activity decline by 25%. The biggest economic destroyer by far was not government policy; it was fear of COVID.

In fact, states that didn’t issue stay-at-home orders in the spring of 2020 saw just about the same amount of economic devastation as states that did issue those orders:

How did lockdowns save lives without hurting the economy?

At this point you may be scratching your head (or, if you’re a lockdown hater, seething with rage). How the heck could lockdowns have a big effect on the transmission of the virus, but only a small effect on the economy? Shouldn’t the tradeoff basically be one for one? Doesn’t every infection you stop mean one less meal in a restaurant, one less drink at the bar, one less trip to the store, etc.?

Well, no. That’s not how it works. As the evidence above shows, it’s fear of the virus that was the big economic killer. And if fear is proportional to actual infection rates, then by suppressing the virus, lockdowns reduced fear.

Let’s do a little thought experiment. Suppose in City A, they lock down. People stay home. The economy gets hurt, but the virus gets suppressed and infections go to a low level. Eventually, they can start to reopen safely, and they don’t immediately get another wave of COVID because there just aren’t that many sick people in town. But in City B, they don’t lock down. 80% of people stay home because of fear, so the economy gets clobbered anyway. But the 20% who go out end up spreading the virus, raising the infection rate to a high level. That causes more fear, and eventually even the 20% who were going out get scared enough to stay home. But now it’s too late — infection has a higher baseline, and takes much longer to go down. So the fear lasts longer, and so does the economic pain.

In fact, this is why in the long run, lockdowns might even have helped the economy. Countries that don’t lock down will have higher infection rates, thus prolonging the fear and keeping people in their house for longer (on top of having to pay higher medical costs). In its World Economic Outlook in October 2020, the IMF notes this possibility:

The effectiveness of lockdowns in reducing infections suggests that lockdowns may pave the way to a faster economic recovery if they succeed in containing the epidemic and thus limit the extent of voluntary social distancing. Therefore, the short-term economic costs of lockdowns could be compensated by stronger medium-term growth, possibly leading to positive overall effects on the economy.

And an analysis by some folks at the Institute for New Economic Thinking found that countries that tried to sacrifice lives to save their economies ended up hurting their economies anyway.

In fact, historical evidence shows that something very similar happened in the Spanish Flu, the eerily similar pandemic that hit us almost exactly 100 years ago. A March 2020 study by economists Sergio Correia, Stephan Luck, and Emil Verner found that cities that enacted stricter social distancing restrictions in response to the Spanish Flu saw their economies recover faster.

In other words, we were warned. This isn’t just a case of — pardon the pun — 20/20 hindsight.

In the summer of 2020, right-wing pundits pointed out the hypocrisy of the Left in advocating lockdowns and street protests. Now it is clear that there were virtually no cases of outdoor transmission of covid, so the Left wasn’t so hypocritical after all.

So what’s the solution for emasculation? Number one, accept reality. Reality keeps changing and we can’t change reality. We can only change ourselves to adjust to reality. Number two, develop a life of love and service. When you seek to be helpful to others, you stop feeling emasculated. You only feel emasculated when you focus on what you’re not getting. In other words, you only feel emasculated when you have a selfish attitude. Change your attitude and you change your life. Change your attitude and your rage goes away. Change your attitude, and instead of focusing on what you’re not getting, you look for where you can help others.

A friend says:

All of these persons writing about how the lockdowns saved lives are idiots, or else they are unaware of the fatality rate associated with contracting Covid and actually becoming ill with it. Better than most I can talk about that since I became ill with the disease.

There are a lot of misunderstandings about (1) how transmissible the disease is (2) who gets it (3) how to prevent its transmission and (4) the medical outcomes for those who get it.

The key is to prevent those who are most at risk from the disease from getting it. I am the classic example of someone who is at risk, but not at the severest risk, once I contracted covid. It almost exclusively kills the elderly obese, and poses a risk to non elderly obese with other co morbidities. Everyone else is at a statistically non existent risk of fatality.

The emphasis should have been on isolating those most at risk and letting the rest of the population roam freely. As an example children are not at risk and except for the most elderly and fattest teachers they are not at risk yet schools were closed out of ostensible fear by teachers that somehow or other they would be exposed to children who would give them the virus. This is non sense and no scientific evidence supports that.

Then once one looks at the factors I have set out, you have to do a cost benefit analysis to locking down. Its important to note that some of the original projections were that this is such a virulent disease and we had not therapeutic means of dealing with it that up to 5% of persons who contracted the disease would die from it. In other words it was a modern day bubonic plague. That turned out to be wildly off the mark.

All the statistics cited by Hiltzik and others are based on worst case projections, none of which came anywhere close to be being accurate. We have never before treated a disease which has a specific victim profile, by locking down everyone including those to whom the disease is harmless.

Through that prism, its clear that lockdowns had little effect on mortality rates and what little effect they had was greatly outweighed by the negative aspects of the lockdown.

What conservatives said was hypocritical was the criticism by liberals of college kids frolicking in close range during spring break in Florida and Texas and criticizing the Trump rallies during the closing days of the campaign as well as the outdoor events at the white house while not objecting to (and in some cases encouraging) protests in the wake of George Floyd’s death. The reality is that none of these outdoor activities carried any risk. The best evidence is that only one case (in China) was transmitted outdoors.

Posted in America, Corona Virus | Comments Off on Emasculation

Why are young men so scared of sex? (5-20-21)

00:00 Zoe Strimpel talks about Love and Sex, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Al0BZMmEtUw
03:00 Why are young men so scared of sex?, https://spectator.us/topic/young-men-scared-sex-sexting/
17:00 Why crypto currency is a fraud, https://www.currentaffairs.org/2021/04/why-cryptocurrency-is-a-giant-fraud
18:00 How Baseball Cards Explain What Bitcoin Really Is, https://jabberwocking.com/how-baseball-cards-explain-what-bitcoin-really-is/
20:00 The Best Bitcoin Debate Ever Recorded (Anthony Pompliano vs Mike Green),

23:00 Startup series on Netflix, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/StartUp_(TV_series)
25:00 Column: Coinbase had a great public stock offering. That doesn’t make bitcoin legit, https://www.latimes.com/business/story/2021-04-27/bitcoin-coinbase-investment
26:00 Pro Palestinian mob attacks Jews in Los Angeles
35:00 Youtube reverses my latest strike
38:20 This crypto analyst is still bullish on bitcoin’s future amid sell-off, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oS9eaABGWPw
42:00 BITCOIN MAKE Or BREAK MOMENT, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7pB9QM-Ylt8
46:00 Washington is rushing to regulate crypto. It’s a mess., https://www.protocol.com/fintech/bitcoin-cryptocurrency-regulations
53:50 Sargon of Akkad: Posh Feminist Zoe Strimpel Outraged Poor People Have Free Speech, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g1T4-Wu4BqA
1:02:40 Zoe Strimpel: This House Believes Sex Has Lost All Meaning (Comedy Debate), https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dLDnwhPQoU
1:09:00 Karen Owen’s Duke Grad Student Sex Power Point?
1:15:00 There Is Life After Campus Infamy – How five people recovered — or vanished — after intense scrutiny at an early age, https://www.nytimes.com/2018/07/21/style/campus-sex-women-exposure.html
1:37:30 Howard Stern Comes Again, https://lukeford.net/blog/?p=139464
1:38:00 Howard Stern on what he learned in therapy, abandoning ‘pure id’ persona, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxKRy8hm2pU
1:56:00 Stuttering John addresses the article that tears into Howard Stern, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzbHGM5yylI
2:02:00 Army Recruitment Ads: China vs Russia vs USA, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kfe6d6MzeLM
2:11:00 Tommy Robinson: Chinese Military Recruitment Ad Puts British Army to Shame, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcoDJB2kP7w
2:15:40 Gregg Henriques: A framework to integrate objective view & personal view, https://www.relationalimplicit.com/henriques/

Posted in America | Comments Off on Why are young men so scared of sex? (5-20-21)

Sleep & Happiness

When I go to bed happy and feel happy even when I wake up and would rather be sleeping, I sleep better. On the other hand, the more angry I get about my lack of sleep or my life circumstances, the worse I sleep.

I find that my happiness corresponds almost exactly with my competence and progress in life. When I break something significant or lose something or damage something or someone in my carelessness, I experience a substantial decrease in my happiness that can last for weeks. On the other hand, when I save more money than I spend, when I take care of aches and pains and other problems, when I keep my stuff clean, organized and in good working order, when I connect with people I like, when I stay appropriate and realistic in various social interactions, when I ask for help when appropriate, when I see that I am contributing to the happiness of others, I feel happy.

Carelessness is the single biggest cause of my unhappiness so for me to build a life that works, I have to consistently take care with everything that is important to me including people, finances, time, and things.

Report:

Sleep, although a vital aspect of human functioning, has received scant attention in happiness research. This research examines the effect of sleep quality on life satisfaction, and one possible mechanism that bridges the two. One cognitive factor that might tie the relationship between sleep and life satisfaction is a belief about the (in) finite nature of happiness (zero-sum belief about happiness; ZBH), a mindset that occurs more under conditions of scarcity. Given the interconnections among experiences prompted by various types of scarcity (e.g., financial and calorie), we predicted that deprived cognitive resource caused by poor sleep may activate the ZBH, thereby hurting one’s life satisfaction. As expected, we found that sleep quality predicted the participants’ life satisfaction, even controlling for baseline variables. More importantly, this relationship was partially mediated by ZBH. This study opens interesting questions on a relatively unexamined role of non-social predictors, such as sleep, in well-being.

As highly social beings, humans are wired to connect with others. Not surprisingly, social experience is one of the most heavily studied topics in happiness research (Diener and Seligman, 2002; Diener et al., 2018). However, no human beings are constantly with others. For example, the average person spends about one third of her time not interacting with others, sleeping. Although a significant portion of time is spent on sleeping, few have examined how this experience relates to happiness (however, see Paunio et al., 2008; Sonnentag et al., 2008; Steptoe et al., 2008). The purpose of this study is to verify the association between sleep and life satisfaction, and investigate one possible cognitive belief that may bridge the two.

Various personal beliefs about happiness affect the actual level of happiness experienced by the person. For instance, those who consider happiness as more relational (Bojanowska and Zalewska, 2016; Shin et al., 2018), controllable (Joshanloo, 2017), and incremental (Tamir et al., 2007) are happier than others. Here we focused on a potentially important, yet unexamined mediating belief – whether happiness exists as a zero-sum state (zero-sum belief about happiness; ZBH). Zero-sum beliefs in general (cf. Von Neumann and Morgenstern, 1944) are based on the assumption that a finite amount of goods exists in the world, in which one’s gain is possible only at the expense of others. Viewed in this way, those with high ZBH are presumed to consider the amount of happiness as fixed (vs. unlimited), amongst people (i.e., if someone gets happier, somebody else might become less happy) as well as across time (i.e., if one is happy now, he or she might become less happy in the future). Such zero-sum beliefs about happiness predict low well-being (Koo and Suh, 2007; Różycka-Tran et al., 2015).

One condition that activates such zero-sum thinking is resource scarcity (Różycka-Tran et al., 2015). The authors noted that resource-deprived mindset may lead individuals to perceive the world as competitive, becoming more prone to zero-sum beliefs. Although scarcity arises in various domains (e.g., financial and calorie), there is a common overlap among the diverse experiences of scarcity (Muraven and Baumeister, 2000; Briers et al., 2006). Sleep replenishes depleted resource (Saper et al., 2005). Conversely, impaired sleep may trigger a sense of scarcity (especially, cognitive), leading people to perceive happiness more in a zero-sum manner. In other words, ZBH would be driven in part by low sleep quality and, consequently lead to a temporary drop in life satisfaction…

A significant portion of daily time is spent on sleep. Yet, much remains to be known about how sleep relates to life satisfaction. In this research, we found that those who sleep well are more satisfied with life, controlling for individual characteristics such as personality. Although social relationships are essential for well-being (Diener and Seligman, 2002; Sandstrom and Dunn, 2014), social activity is costly and energy-consuming (Baumeister et al., 2000). This is perhaps why people need a certain amount of time alone, which serves a restorative function (Coplan and Bowker, 2014). Sleep, although far less studied than social experiences, needs more research attention in future happiness research.

More research is needed to clarify how sleep predicts life satisfaction, but we uncovered one possibility. Those who sleep poorly were more likely to view happiness as a zero-sum game. A zero-sum mindset leads people to engage in more social comparison and savor positive experiences less, which eventually lead to less happiness (Koo and Suh, 2007). As many societies become more competitive and market-oriented, sleep is easily regarded as a waste of time (and money). However, sacrificed sleep may create a vicious cycle of making the world appear as a zero-sum competition, which aggravates interpersonal stress. Increasing public awareness of the importance of sleep might have greater societal benefits than most assume.

The link between sleep quality and life satisfaction highlighted in this paper might be bidirectional. A satisfied mindset about life may increase sleep quality, but as our findings imply, a good sleep may also affect how positively one evaluates his/her life. More conclusive statement about causal direction should be derived from additional longitudinal work. One notable finding is that the zero-sum belief mediates sleep quality and life satisfaction, even controlling for traits known to strongly influence happiness (e.g., neuroticism). It implies that believing happiness as a fixed, predetermined experience is psychologically deflating, above and beyond the predisposition to experience negative affect. Finally, replicating current finding with more sophisticated sleep measures (e.g., polysomnography) and with diverse samples will be desirable.

What constitutes a good life? Many people in modern society may shove a “good sleep” below other priorities, such as high status or income. However, our study suggests that this inconspicuous daily routine not only restores the body, but also elevates the mind’s view of life.

Posted in Happiness | Comments Off on Sleep & Happiness

Hysterias

00:00 Political Hysterias Of The Right & Left, https://lukeford.net/blog/?p=139452
03:00 Covid Cover-Up: Did It Come From A Lab?, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LgGPygFHh4
05:00 As New Evidence Emerges For COVID “Lab-Leak” Theory, Journalists Who Screamed “Conspiracy” Humiliate Themselves, https://mtracey.substack.com/p/as-new-evidence-emerges-for-covid
11:00 WP: Congress is finally investigating the lab accident covid-19 origin theory, https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/global-opinions/congress-is-finally-investigating-the-lab-accident-covid-19-origin-theory/2021/05/06/d7bfb0e4-aeaf-11eb-b476-c3b287e52a01_story.html
13:00 Column: The evidence is clear — COVID lockdowns saved lives without harming economies, https://www.latimes.com/business/story/2021-05-19/covid-lockdowns-worked
26:00 Breakdown of the Pentagon UFO videos with Mick West, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Le7Fqbsrrm8
47:00 Attack on Jewish diners by members of pro-Palestinian caravan in Beverly Grove investigated as possible hate crime, https://ktla.com/news/local-news/jewish-men-allegedly-attacked-by-members-of-pro-palestinian-caravan-outside-beverly-grove-restaurant/
57:00 What to do about Woke Capital, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SvAB5alv6wo
58:00 Christopher Rufo on fighting critical race theory brainwashing, https://twitter.com/realchrisrufo
1:14:40 Michael Anton on fighting woke business
1:21:00 Peter Thiel, J.D. Vance Invest in Rumble Video Platform Popular on Political Right, https://www.wsj.com/articles/peter-thiel-j-d-vance-invest-in-rumble-video-platform-popular-on-political-right-11621447661
1:35:00 Listening In: Radio And The American Imagination, https://lukeford.net/blog/?p=139448
1:38:00 The late radio host Bob Grant, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FL9ECthEeVo
1:50:00 Liberal media forced to backtrack on the origins of Covid
1:57:30 Crypto Mega-Crash with JF Gariepy, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c7bazTQsGAw
2:22:50 Dennis Prager says conservatives should come out of the closet
2:26:00 Chicago mayor prioritizes non-white journos
2:27:30 Google docs go PC
2:33:00 Cold War II—Just How Dangerous Is China? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E12r-37GZI0
2:35:00 Why is Tim Tebow getting a second shot?
2:36:20 A critical view of Bitcoin, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IoWIejPF_tc
2:46:00 Tucker Carlson on equity

Column: Is Elon Musk trying to destroy bitcoin over environmental concerns?,
https://www.latimes.com/business/story/2021-05-17/elon-musk-destroying-bitcoin
Coinbase had a great public stock offering. That doesn’t make bitcoin legit,
https://www.latimes.com/business/story/2021-04-27/bitcoin-coinbase-investment
How Baseball Cards Explain What Bitcoin Really Is, https://jabberwocking.com/how-baseball-cards-explain-what-bitcoin-really-is/
Why Cryptocurrency Is A Giant Fraud, https://www.currentaffairs.org/2021/04/why-cryptocurrency-is-a-giant-fraud

Posted in America, Radio | Comments Off on Hysterias

Howard Stern Comes Again

Howard writes in this 2019 book:

* I’m not proud of my first two books. I don’t even have them displayed on my bookshelf at home. I think of them, and of the interviews I did with my guests during those first couple decades of my career, and I cringe. I was an absolute maniac. My narcissism was so strong that I was incapable of appreciating what somebody else might be feeling.
I have so many regrets about guests from that time. I asked Gilda Radner if Gene Wilder had a big penis. Great question. Drove her right out the door. George Michael’s band Wham! Everyone I worked with said, “Whatever you do, don’t ask them if they’re gay. Do not ask them if they’re gay.” Within twenty seconds, I asked them if they were gay. Eminem came on the show once then never again. Same with Will Ferrell.
Possibly my biggest regret was my interview with Robin Williams. When Robin came on the show in the early nineties, I spent the entire time badgering him about how he had divorced his first wife and remarried his son’s former nanny. I was attacking the guy, and he was justifiably furious with me. Years later, I realized I finally needed to apologize. I had already done this with some other people. I called them and tried to make amends. Some were gracious. A radio guy I had been awful to said, “You know what, man? I’m so glad you called. I actually felt bad for you that you were carrying around so much bitterness and ugliness inside, and I’m happy you don’t have that anymore.” Others were angry. A famous comedian I had bashed said to me, “I appreciate that you called, but I don’t know if I could ever forgive you. I had to go through a lot of misery, because your fans were brutal.” I didn’t know what Robin’s reaction would be. He could have hung up on me. He could have cursed me out. I had to do it. It took me twenty years to work up the nerve. I was in the midst of tracking down his phone number, and the next day he died. I’m still filled with sadness over his loss and remorse for my failure to reach out sooner.
Telling Carly Simon how hot she was for a half-hour or spewing sex questions to Wilmer Valderrama—this ultimately led to nothing. It wasn’t good radio. It was meaningless. It was just me being self-absorbed and compulsive about asking something that would provoke and antagonize. Those weren’t really interviews. They were monologues. Instead of a conversation, it was just me blurting out ridiculous things. I had some real issues.
Then I started going to a psychotherapist.
This was in the late nineties. I had no idea how therapy worked. The only thing I knew about it was what I saw in movies and on television, where people would just sit there and tell stories. So that’s what I did. My first session, I sat down in the chair and began telling the therapist anecdotes as if I was on the radio. I hit him with all my favorite routines. I did a thorough and involved set on the Stern family tree, complete with impressions of my family. I put together a few minutes on marriage, then moved into the pressures of the radio business, and closed with the trials and tribulations of raising a family.
After I was finished with my stand-up, the therapist instead of applauding said, “There’s nothing funny going on here. Quite frankly, some of this stuff sounds pretty sad.” My first response was to get defensive. Who was he to say that? I could tell that story and laugh. I had done it many times. Gradually, after a few more sessions, I realized he was right. He was the first person who ever said to me, “I take you seriously.” I had always been hungry for someone to confide in like that, but I had pushed away my hunger. That’s often what people who are traumatized do. In order to protect themselves, they act like nobody else matters. They tell themselves they don’t need anyone.
The irony is that I’ve always had an appreciation for others in my work. Yes, it’s called The Howard Stern Show , but I’m at my best when I have a bunch of people around me, when I can call on them and collaborate. Whether it’s Robin or my producer Gary Dell’Abate or our jack-of-all-trades (sound effects, impressions, and so much more) Fred Norris; the staff of incredible writers and brilliant engineers; my front office, including chief operating officer Marci Turk and senior vice president Jeremy Coleman; my agent, Don Buchwald, and my executive assistant, Laura Federici; my bosses and the sales department at SiriusXM—I consider everyone a part of the team. What we do is like music, in a way. It’s like a symphony. That is truly how I’ve always seen myself: as an orchestra conductor.
Yet that generosity of spirit didn’t extend to my guests. I should have treated them as talented soloists and welcomed them to join in our performance. I was just too afraid that the audience would be bored when they didn’t get their fix of outrageousness—as if some quiet notes would have destroyed the concerto. Everything had to be one loud, crashing crescendo.
Initially, I went to therapy twice a week. Then the therapist had me up it to three times. Eventually he recommended I make it four. I thought, “Man, I didn’t know I was that screwed up.” I was reluctant to make such a big commitment, but I did it. I completely gave myself over to the process.
The more I went, the more that translated into how I interviewed my guests. I found myself changing my approach because I had experienced what it was like to have someone genuinely interested in my life. Therapy opened me up and enabled me to appreciate how fulfilling it was to be truly heard. That led me to the thought: “You know, somebody else might actually have something to say. Let’s just sit here and listen and not make it all about you.”

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